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-   -   Is this disrespectful? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=445531)

  • Feb 10, 2010, 04:20 PM
    wall12
    Is this disrespectful?
    If you recently had a fallout with your partner, is it appropriate to keep talking as "friends" immediately after?
  • Feb 10, 2010, 05:31 PM
    Katie36d

    Depends on the situation and what the reason for the break up was. If you were friends before lots of things
  • Feb 10, 2010, 10:28 PM
    Kitkat22

    If the breakup was an abusive one, then I'd say no. If you broke up because you have found someone new or vice versa I'd also say no. If you parted on good terms then I don't see a problem. Hope this helps.
  • Feb 10, 2010, 10:35 PM
    friend4u178

    If neither of you want the other one back I would say OK.

    If one partner still wants the relationship to continue then a definite no-no , that just breeds False hope and stops them from starting the healing process.
  • Feb 10, 2010, 10:42 PM
    kp2171
    Not much backstory given.

    Well... I don't believe it is disrespectful after a breakup for one person to ask for no contact. Might seem vindictive, but it often clears away the clutter and confusion that can be present when people try hard to stay friends. Even with an amicable break, sometimes more distance can help clear the way for focused grounding.

    In this case... the person asking for NC is not being disrespectful generally... my opinion.

    But if the other person doesn't respect that need... well, that's disrespectful, generally speaking... my opinion.

    Sure, there are all kinds of angles that can muddle this... but I just don't think anyone has a right to demand their ex be buddies.

    I'm close to a couple of my ex loves... but it took time and distance to come around. If "protocol" demanded I help support them as they are moving on... it wouldn't be pretty.

    But... as mentioned... there's no one case fits all... depends on the people involved, their history, their needs in the moment, and on and on and on...

    Dontcha love "maybe... maybe not" answers?

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