I have had two bad marriages, one physically abusive, in which I had a daughter, the second I had a son and he was a total control freak although during the dating period he was awesome#2), romantic, and I never felt insecure and I totally trusted him, problem was, he thought of women as 2nd class citizens and never considered my point valid. So now I'm freshhly*8weeks) out of a bad, mentally abusive relationship)Not a husband)see my other post.. wow 3 different types of abuse) although I have dated some decent men who never became more than boyfriends(we wanted different things) I find myself wondering are people right? Is true love B.S. all I want in my life is my other half, a man who will have my back, like I will have his, are all men about getting bored and stepping out on their partners at some point or simply losing interest in someone? What has happened to commitment?

Sometimes bad experiences make us feel hopeless, and we can't see reality, or the good that comes from going through bad experiences. The is much to learn, and gain from catching hell, but we become distracted by hurt feelings, or emotional pain.

In your case now, having read what you have written, your heart is hurting, and your wondering when it will stop, and if you will be happy again.

When the emotional dust has settled, you will be grateful for the experience because you will see the changes, and adjustments, you need to make for the good of your future.

Just can look back on your own history, and see the kids that came out of those bad experiences with guys, and know the love survived through them, even though the relationship did not.

But until the shock, and emotional dust has settled, its very hard to see the good that you can take with you going forward.

No true love is not BS, you just have to go thru a lot of BS before it finds you!

I think that true love is out there. A HUGE part of finding the right one, is being his friend first, knowing who he is. It seems like your relationships started fine, but suddenly he went from "good guy" to "bad guy." In the early stages of a relationship, almost everyone likes to put on the "nice guy/nice girl" façade, and show their true colors later on. This is why patience comes in handy.

Threads merged

Well I am back to the dating scene which by the way I hate w a passion, I'm 47 and am exhausted.. I just want one good < MATURE> man who wants the same things in life.A decent partner.someone respectful, not selfish, and above all a GROWN up. Is there any hope?

Instead of dating, get your energy back, and work to rebuild your life after a tough break up!

Dating is for having fun getting to know someone. You really do have to be about the fun, and not the looking for a decent guy. Doubt if your even ready at this time to be a fun person.

Oh I'm fun all right dating does not mean relationship, I just get tired of the lines in between.