I talk to my brother each night and ask his advice on something... like I did when he was alive. I want him to tell me what to do... like come to me in a dream or send me a sign but I get nothing. I have only ever felt him around me once but never since. I don't like the thought that he is not here.

We don't always feel their presence because they know (whether or not we like or want to accept it) that we need to be able to move past the grief and mourning. Sometimes, they stay around but try to keep their presence subtle so that we can learn to let go of the pain and heal. If you are listening for a shout, he may be barely whispering.

He is always with you. He always will be. He is a part of you. That will never change.

When you feel like you need his help, think about how he would have helped you while he was alive. Think about how you solved problems and dilemmas together. Let that help you figure out what you need or should do.

I know that you are so right and I am really trying to get past the griefing process but I do not know what else to do. I have passed the point where I am not crying everyday and I can actually speak to people without getting upset.

It may not seem like it right now, but it sounds like you are healing.

It is an old cliché, but it is true-grieving takes time. I will be honest that even time probably won't take away all the grief. However, it will make it less painful to remember and share those memories. I don't know if you like writing or arts and crafts (or even gardening), but they are activities that can help focus the mind and busy the hands when you feel like your emotions are running away with you.

One of the big things to remember is not to put him on a pedestal.

Sorry for the lost of your brother. But you have to let him go even though its hard to loose someone!

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Originally Posted by 899874xx

sorry for the lost of your brother. but you have to let him go even though its hard to loose someone!

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She DOESN'T have to let him go - there is no set pattern for grieving, for moving on, no right way to grieve or mourn. When it becomes excessive, then it's a problem.

To OP - Your brother's spirit will ALWAYS be with you. I agree that when there is a decision to be made you have to sit and think about what he would want you to do, what he would recommend.

I am a widow - people told me wonderful experiences about dreaming about, "seeing," "hearing," "being touched" by someone who is deceased, feeling their presence. I have never had that experience - it is different for everyone.

I am sorry for your loss and I wish you well.

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Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

She DOESN'T have to let him go - there is no set pattern for grieving, for moving on, no right way to grieve or mourn. When it becomes excessive, then it's a problem.

To OP - Your brother's spirit will ALWAYS be with you. I agree that when there is a decision to be made you have to sit and think about what he would want you to do, what he would recommend.

I am a widow - people told me wonderful experiences about dreaming about, "seeing," "hearing," "being touched" by someone who is deceased, feeling their presence. I have never had that experience - it is different for everyone.

I am sorry for your loss and I wish you well.

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Opps sorry then I don't give good advice as I thought I did
But still sorry for the loss of your brother