Jerry here, I've been living with my girlfriend for 2 years now, I'm hmong and she's white and we both lived together for 2 years, I'm 24 and she's 18. She's going out with her best friends every night now and I don't know what to say or do, because we lived together for 2 years without having this problem and now its happening. She won't tell me were she's going every night, all I know is she is drinking every time she goes out and also somking weed, do to her best friends. I don't really want to live with someone who goes out every night and drinks and smokes, but this is her and I love her. It hurts a lot, because she's acting different, and she said she loves me too, but from this point tell the lease end, she can't show it and trying not to lead me on until the end and then will take a break and she other people until I know myself. To me, us taking a break we don't see other people, its different because once you do were done. Is it right to ask her where is she going when we always gone together to house parties and what not? Is she seeing someone and not telling me? 4 days of drinking and smoking and partying without me knowing, is it wright for her not to tell me where she is, because we live together and we both love each other.

Sorry to say, but she is extremely young - 18. She is going to go through a phase of partying and being experimental with different drugs/alcohol as most of us do. You two are at opposite ends of the maturity spectrum. I did a lot of stupid stuff at her age, and I'm sure you did as well. It doesn't mean she is cheating on you, it just means you have something to think about in regards to this relationship continuing on, because I don't see her behavior changing anytime in the near future.

Talk to her about how you feel, but just know that her actions right now do not show that the relationship is a huge priority to her, and at that age, I can't really blame her. Bottom line, if there is no open communication, there is no relationship, regardless of the lifestyle you two live.

She's going through her experimental phase and you can't control her.

She's still learning and experiencing new things, while you seem to be ready to settle down. You're going to have to find a way to accept this fact; otherwise, it's better to go your separate ways so that you don't continue to torture yourself by constantly wondering where she is and waiting for her to come home.

She did say that she still loves you, but this is going to take a huge leap of faith on your part to trust her. Can you do it?

She's going through her phase and this sort of thing is natural. How were you living with her when she was 16 is what I'm curious about?

There isn't anything you can do to change her, this is the path she is choosing

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Originally Posted by Romefalls19

She's going through her phase and this sort of thing is natural. How were you living with her when she was 16 is what I'm curious about?

There isn't anything you can do to change her, this is the path she is choosing

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I was her brothers friend and she, at the age of 16 mom and dad didn't want her, kick her out, I said to mom and dad that you can't do that, will they did, so I took her in as a brothers friend and she and I started owr relationship after she became 17, the first year she did act like my girl, but I know age diff, I'm hmong, in owr ways of life we can get married when were 16 or younger, its all about love and families. I'd ask her would you want to just thow 2 years of the most happies time of owr lives just to go out and drink, smoke and have parties without telling me, because back then we would go out with friends and drink and party. Idk why now, she goes out alone and leave me home without her. You know how... when the first time you look at one another and the first time you kiss, we both agreed on it that we've been doing that for 2 years, and now when I get up and look at her just like the first time we fell in love, negative words come out of her mouth. Also her friend said that, she's going to make her just like her, to go out and drink, smoke and party and have lots of sex with other guys without me knowing. I have it on recding. Should I show her that? What can I do? She and I are still in love and this is the second time her friend has done this.

Whatever your thinking about this relationship, it ain't happening, just because she is young and has yet to grow up. Many young people go through that after finally getting their freedom, or first time out of the house. You may love her, but I really doubt she knows what real love is, or is ready for it.
That obvious, even though she can say the word.

Your best bet is gather her things, and tell her to go live with her friend, and call when she grows up, and becomes an adult, and ready to stop being an out of control kid.

Now you have an idea why her parents threw her out, and you had better do the same, because you sure as hell won't change her.