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-   -   Help - urgent (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=44009)

  • Nov 20, 2006, 06:23 PM
    Skaskank90
    help - urgent
    hi =] so I have a quick question I would really appreciate a response to, because I would like to know how to deal with this tomorrow

    there is a guy that I have been "with" for a few weeks now, and we're what a lot of people call friends with benefits, but recently , I was informed he has feelings for me. He treats me so well, compliments me all of the time, and from what I hear can't stop talking about how much he likes me. However, this past weekend, he went away for 3 days and did not have a cell phone or anything. Today, he seemed very unusual and quiet, and not flirty. Did something happen? Did he forget me? Or was he just having a bad day, and if maybe he did forget about me a bit, how do I regain interest?
  • Nov 20, 2006, 06:40 PM
    corriehac
    Just remain a good friend, he will come around and let you know. It sounds like your falling in love. Its always good to be a good friend first, the benefit part is a plus. But you must understand that at this time you both are just friends and some times it blossoms into more sometimes not. Be prepared to step down if he does fall in love with someone else and just be friendsA!
  • Nov 21, 2006, 02:43 AM
    Krs
    I personally disagree, I don't feel the benefits part is a plus one, could you even consider that the benefits part could be why he is acting that way now that he had time to think! :cool:

    Skaskank, if I were you just be friends act normal, don't question him so much, be yourself :)
  • Nov 21, 2006, 02:49 AM
    imation
    Maybe he got the impression that all you want from him is 'benifits' and seeing as he really likes you could have been blinded into thinking that you felt the same way, from which your post doesn't really specify
    You could either ask him why he's been acting weird lately, honesty is always good, or you could just be normal be yourself and see what's going on, the friends who told you he has feelings for you may be able to shed some light on the subject if he has been talking to them
  • Nov 21, 2006, 06:52 AM
    talaniman
    Be patient and don't press him with questions. Let him come to you. He should work out whatever it is at his own pace.
  • Nov 21, 2006, 06:56 AM
    Tuscany
    Friends with benefits is a tangled web. It is a hard place to be because often feelings get hurt. I would say just continue to be you. Don't ask him questions about his feelings, just be the friend. Guys often take a little longer defining their feelings (to themselves) and even longer when they have to tell other people. Give him the time he needs and when he is ready he will come back to you.
  • Nov 21, 2006, 07:08 AM
    Krs
    Couldn't spread the love Tuscany but absolutley correct :)
  • Nov 21, 2006, 04:02 PM
    Wildcat21
    Do you have feelings for him?

    Friend with Benefits, as documented here 0ver and over and over is very unhealhty and EXTREMELY confusing.

    Go slow - give him space.

    DWB - your supposed to check your emotions at the door. Do you feel for him?
  • Nov 21, 2006, 08:24 PM
    s_cianci
    It's hard to say for sure. He could have something on his mind. Wait several more days. Then if you don't hear from him just drop him a quick line asking him how he is. Keep it light with no pressure. If he wants to talk about anything, he will.

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