Ask Me Help Desk - What does he think about us?

What does he think about us?

He and I dated several months. I like him very much. But then he got a job in another country far away from here. I texted him these two days. I said something simple, "How are you?" And he replied "I am good, and miss you very much." He then texted me "Can I kiss you?". I answered him "But it's impossible and improper." He texted "Just an idea."
I don't want to break the contact with him. Although I know we are in two different places, I still feel happy just to get a message from him. The feeling reminded me of the time he used to text me a lot, but now I am the person who keep texting him. But he always replies me; just he doesn't text me first, or call me. Yesterday night, I texted him, "later if you have time, I could play the piano for you on the phone." And he replied "fine."
What does he think about me? And does he know I like him? What should I do? If he doesn't like me back, I want to be like a sister of his. He once joked that he wanted to be my god brother.

I'm interested to know how old are you and what your nationality is...

However, we can't tell you what he thinks - only he can. Why don't you ask him? Then you can decide how to proceed.

I don't want to tell you my age. But I am from Austin, TX. If you want to know more, my grandma was from Mexico. Does it help you?
Thank you for your answer.

Quote:

Originally Posted by blueassea

I don't want to tell you my age. But I am from Austin, TX. If you want to know more, my grandma was from Mexico. Does it help you?
Thank you for your answer.

Er, no. Does this mean you're Hispanic? It would be useful to know your age as this will inform my reply - if you don't want to tell me your exact age, you can give me an age range - e.g. 15-18, 18-20, etc.

I am carefree enough to expose my private life concerns here, and I asked about love, so I don't think it is necessary to let you know my exact age. I could easily tell you a fake age to avoid it, but I won't. If you could really help me and feel what I feel, you would answer this question without asking questions. Things might be handled differently by people of different ages. But when a person likes someone, that feeling is the same for people of different ages.

Quote:

Originally Posted by blueassea

What does he think about me?

We are not psychics so we don't know. You should know him better than us but from the sounds of it I think he wants to be intimate with you. At the same time it sounds like he's kind of getting annoyed of you but long distance relationships are hard to maintain through technology. Its just the things around each of you will soon be more important to you because it feels more real.

Quote:

Originally Posted by blueassea

And does he know I like him?

If you dated him, than yes he should know but no one can be sure if you don't tell them straight up.

Quote:

Originally Posted by blueassea

What should I do?

What you should do is think if this long distance relationship will be too hard for you. If that is the case you need to tell him and part ways. If not you need to talk to him about where to go from here, how to manage this relationship etc...

Quote:

Originally Posted by blueassea

If he doens't like me back, I want to be like a sister of his. He once joked that he wanted to be my god brother.

You are willing to be his back up? As long as you are with him you shouldn't settle for less than your expectations. If you want a romantic relationship with him, let him know. Its really hard not to get your feelings involved as a "sister" when you already have feelings for him which leads to a devastating relationship.

Yes, you said that the Kiss would be improper, that has to mean you are very young or from a culture that does not allow physical contact without specific ritual followed.

So if you are 12 or 13, then most likely a long term relationship will not work, at best you may remain friends and both date and see others though the years, and who knows you may see and get back at some point

If you are 20 and not from a culture that has dating rules, I think you need to rethink your dating habits

Quote:

Originally Posted by none12345

We are not psychics so we dont know. You should know him better than us but from the sounds of it i think he wants to be intimate with you. At the same time it sounds like he's kind of getting annoyed of you but long distance relationships are hard to maintain through technology. Its just the things around each of you will soon be more important to you because it feels more real.

If you dated him, than yes he should know but no one can be sure if you dont tell them straight up.

What you should do is think if this long distance relationship will be too hard for you. If that is the case you need to tell him and part ways. If not you need to talk to him about where to go from here, how to manage this relationship etc...

You are willing to be his back up? As long as you are with him you shouldnt settle for less than your expectations. If you want a romantic relationship with him, let him know. Its really hard not to get your feelings involved as a "sister" when you already have feelings for him which leads to a devestating relationship.

Thank you for the detailed answers. I will think about your advice.

Move on...

Your age matters because it will change my answer. So, I'll give you both.

If you're a young teen, then it really shouldn't matter. Be his friend, text him, have fun, just be friends. Long distance usually means that you'll find someone else and so will he.

If you're older, an adult, well, it depends. Can you visit him? Can he visit you? Do you want a relationship with this man?

Either way, we can't tell you what he feels or thinks about you. Only he knows that, so ask him.

Good luck.

I don't know how he could kiss me in a long distance if I replied "yes" after he texted me "can I kiss you?".

I don't know whether I should stop contacting him. Now almost every day I text him. But he replied my message very late and very simple.

Quote:

Originally Posted by blueassea

I don't know how he could kiss me in a long distance if I replied "yes" after he texted me "can I kiss you?".

Um, are you serious? You sound about 13. Regardless of whether you're 13 or 30 it sounds as if you need a reality check.

The guy's away, he responds to your texts briefly - either ask him what his intentions are, or move on. With your level of naivety the whole thing is impossible.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gemini54

Um, are you serious? You sound about 13. Regardless of whether you're 13 or 30 it sounds as if you need a reality check.

The guy's away, he responds to your texts briefly - either ask him what his intentions are, or move on. With your level of naivety the whole thing is impossible.

Thank you. I am not that naïve.

Gemini54, I just want you to know that I am sincerely thankful to your advice. The response above seems a little sarcastic. So I say it here again :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by blueassea

Gemini54, I just want you to know that I am sincerely thankful to your advice. The response above seems a little sarcastic. So I say it here again :)

It wasn't sarcastic, it was incredulous.