I have received oral sex from several women, and had vaginal intercourse with a decent number... and I don't even get close to coming. It's kind of like exercise, just pumping away until she gets sore or I get bored.

And from all the articles, you'd think EVERY guy comes just fine once he gets hard. For all the help with women's orgasms, is there any help for a guy who can't seem to come?

It isn't even about "letting go." I don't get tense at all during sex. It's frustrating, because there isn't a point for me.

I can come from masturbation (indeed, it's the ONLY way I've ever gotten off).

Does anybody know what my problem could be, and how to solve it?

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I can come from masturbation (indeed, it's the ONLY way I've ever gotten off).

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You've gotten too used to the feel of your own hand and nothing else will do it for you.

Stop masturbating.

You'll eventually get to the point where if you have intercourse or oral sex you'll have to come because you haven't been masturbating.

Trust me, it's the only way. Stop using your hand. Tie it up if you have to.

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Originally Posted by Gemini54

You've gotten too used to the feel of your own hand and nothing else will do it for you.

Stop masturbating.

You'll eventually get to the point where if you have intercourse or oral sex you'll have to come because you haven't been masturbating.

Trust me, it's the only way. Stop using your hand. Tie it up if you have to.

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AGREED!
Go cold turkey for a few months, including sex of any way, shape, or form.

If I were you I would stop maturbating for several weeks and if you know you are going to be having some 'special time' with a girl get yourself worked up first.
Watch porn, draw out the foreplay, anything to get you super revved up before doing the actual act.

Is it really a problem. You get hard okay, you just do not come.

Well some women might think that this is a perfect gift to them. Sex could last longer, and you could very much give a women many orgasms.

Consider it a gift.

Another question is if you're wearing a condom and if you are how thick is it? Maybe try a thinner condom so that your penis gets more stimulation. Maybe just check to see that you're not using any of the Novocaine lube or condoms.

Hope it works out for you.

Do you have any health issues? High blood pressure? Prostate problems?

Inorgasmia can be health related as well.

He can have an orgasm and ejaculation when he is playing with himself.

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Originally Posted by Jesushelper76

Is it really a problem. You get hard okay, you just do not come.

Well some women might think that this is a perfect gift to them. Sex could last longer, and you could very much give a women many orgasms.

Consider it a gift.

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Last longer? It NEVER STOPS UNLESS I GET BORED! I can shag for 3 hours or more, give the girl 7 orgasms (my current record, but it's been awhile), and finally be all "Can we cuddle now?"

I'm not talking about 'taking a long time to come,' which wouldn't be a big deal. I mean DOES. NOT. HAPPEN. You ever have someone go down on you... and keep on... and keep on... and finally cramp up and quit? That goes over about as well as it sounds, from both perspectives.

A gift, you say? Well, what's in it for me? So many guys will take so much garbage from a woman, just for that tasty milkshake. But for a guy who can't come, WHAT'S THE POINT?

I've tried all manner of condoms, and condomless (in circumstances of low disease risk), makes no particular difference.

When you masturbate do you apply tighter grip than oral or vaginal intercourse can provide?

Can you climax if a female is giving you a 'hand job'?

Are you mentally stimulated during sex with a partner?

When you masturbate are you fantasizing about things you can't/don't feel comfortable sharing with your partners?

Do you have a problem letting yourself go mentally or are you maybe holding back part of yourself without realizing it? Are you concerned about losing control long before you even get close to climax?

I don't think there's anything too uncomfortable.

I mean, women don't really care about anything except their pleasure, so it's not like I'm really _into_ it all that much. Just please them, and maybe they'll stick around awhile (works occasionally).

I don't do women who aren't reasonably attractive, and most are quite good-looking. Hand-jobs frighten me (I've had some... unpleasant experiences where my manhood was treated like a handrail).

"Women don't really care about anything except their pleasure"

THAT answers that question for me, right there.

First, stop with the masturbation.

Second--try getting involved with a woman that you're actually mentally involved with, and with a woman that you don't have the attitude of "please them and they'll stick around a while".

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Originally Posted by Clogbeaten

I don't think there's anything too uncomfortable.

I mean, women don't really care about anything except their pleasure, so it's not like I'm really _into_ it all that much. Just please them, and maybe they'll stick around awhile (works occasionally).

I don't do women who aren't reasonably attractive, and most are quite good-looking. Hand-jobs frighten me (I've had some... unpleasant experiences where my manhood was treated like a handrail).

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This post sounds like you need to change your attitude. You 'do' women instead of 'making love' or enjoying a mutually satisfying act. If you aren't 'into' it, you can't really be surprised that you don't get anything more than erect.

I get the feeling that instead of getting into a relationship and working on it, you 'hook' up with women and neither of you are in it for anything more than getting laid. It seems to have affected your ability to get full pleasure out of a relationship.

I am almost wondering how old you are.

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Originally Posted by Clogbeaten

I don't think there's anything too uncomfortable.

I mean, women don't really care about anything except their pleasure, so it's not like I'm really _into_ it all that much. Just please them, and maybe they'll stick around awhile (works occasionally).

I don't do women who aren't reasonably attractive, and most are quite good-looking. Hand-jobs frighten me (I've had some... unpleasant experiences where my manhood was treated like a handrail).

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Your problem goes deeper than just not being able to have an orgasm. You sound like a self centered misogynist. You're having sex for all the wrong reasons. Stick to your hand - it sounds like much more fun that communicating with a real person.

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Originally Posted by Gemini54

Your problem goes deeper than just not being able to have an orgasm. You sound like a self centered misogynist. You're having sex for all the wrong reasons. Stick to your hand - it sounds like much more fun that communicating with a real person.

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Simply brilliant.

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Originally Posted by Clogbeaten

I don't think there's anything too uncomfortable.

I mean, women don't really care about anything except their pleasure, so it's not like I'm really _into_ it all that much. Just please them, and maybe they'll stick around awhile (works occasionally).

I don't do women who aren't reasonably attractive, and most are quite good-looking. Hand-jobs frighten me (I've had some... unpleasant experiences where my manhood was treated like a handrail).

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I kind of felt sorry for you... until this post. Until you learn to respect women better than THIS, you should remain dormant with them, and "do" your hand.

I hope you and your hands have a very happy life together, because until you change your attitude, you won't be getting an orgasm from anything but masturbating.

I did not feel sorry for him at the start, but me saying that does not really make a difference now.

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Originally Posted by Jesushelper76

I did not feel sorry for him at the start, but me saying that does not really make a difference now.

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I did to a certain extent because there are guys who do have serious problems with not being able to climax for a variety of reasons (mental as well as physical).

Being able to keep an erection for 'hours' is not a 'gift' to me. Vibrators can 'last' forever, too.

I knew it was not really an issue when he stated that he could get off by playing with himself. If he can do that, then there is no series problem to talk about.