I am married with 4 kids, 2 from a previous marriage. My first husband abused drugs and alcohol and was physically and mentally abusive. I have been married for the second time for almost 10 years. My husband is a very strong willed person. He is very traditional and conservative. We've never had the best communication, but it is at an all time low. He constantly blames me for every bad situation arises, from finances to him forgetting our youngest child's coat. He reminds me constantly of my failing; the house isn't clean enough, I don't try to get a better job; he can't give a compliment, only criticism. I have dealt with it, but now it's starting on the kids, primarily my oldest daughter, who is 14. He always makes fun of her flat chest, calls her lazy, criticized her performance in sports. If she stands up to him, he flies off the handle. He calls her disrespectful (which she isn't), and has even shoved her on the bed, against the wall, forced her onto her knees and shoved her face in the snow. He still paddles her. She is on antidepressants, has quit basketball because she didn't want to be yelled at, and her grades have dropped. He has even started in on our sons, who are biologically his. If they don't perform well in their sporting events, or cry (they are 8 and 5), he calls them pussies, babies, lazy, etc. He threatens all of the children whenever he is mad. It's like we're living with a different person. I have asked him to go to counseling, but he refuses "to tell a stranger our business." We put up a great front in public, but at home, it's a different story. I have been on anti-anxiety meds for over a year, and I can't sleep without a sleep aid. I think we should leave, but I don't want to make a mistake... Please offer your opinion.