Hi, I would love to have some advice on how my spouse can adopt my daugther. I am currently 7 months pregnant and my daugther is due Feb 15th 2007. My spouse is not the babies father, but would love to adopt her as his own. He is in the military and has been in for 10 years. I do know who the babies father is, but we are going through court proceedings right now for communicating a threat and assault on a female. The court has not decided what will come of these charges yet. Im hoping that he goes to prison for 1 to 3 years. He had mulitiple charges in the past of assault. If he does not get prison time then he will have a no contact order with me for a year and if he is good within that year than the charges will be dropped. I know that I have a lot going on. If you can be help me that would be greatly appreciated. Im only 25 years old and I live in North Carolina. I feel like I need to move to a state that would be more willing to let my husband adopt my daugther. Her safety is important to me. Thank you so much.:p

I may be wrong, but typically when a baby is born in wedlock the husband is considered the father. If the child is born before you got married, then he would have to adopt.

I will agree, if your husband merely claims to be the father, and is listed on the birth certificate, that really is the end of it, unless the bio father contests it.

If not the father of the child will have to be notified, he will have to wave his rights as the father ( so if you are not sure who, you will have to find out who by having all possible sperm donors tested till you find the right one)

You don't say how long you have been married or whether the father knows he is the father.

While I am disinclined to suggest that someone be less than honest, I think this is a situation where its justified. As long as you are married when the child is born, its unlikely that the hospital or your OB/GYN is going to question that your husband is the father. When they ask for the father's name, just tell give them your husband's name.

If the biological father does contest this, you can always say you misunderstood and thought they needed the parent, not the biological father.

I'm not sure the specific state is a real issue. If the father willingly consents, then your husband will be able to adopt your daughter. However, if he doesn't, then you'll be in for a long line of legal battles over visitation, child support, etc. It's not likely that any judge will force the father to give up his rights in favor of your husband adopting your daughter if he (the father) doesn't want to. The father's rights may be severely curtailed given his criminal background and everything but not totally taken away.

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Originally Posted by J_9

I may be wrong, but typically when a baby is born in wedlock the husband is considered the father.

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Yes, this is generally true. However, if the biological father can prove he's the dad (by compelling a DNA test), then all bets are off. Considering that you're now only in your 7th month, you obviously haven't been married to your husband that long so the numbers will suggest the possibility of someone else being the dad. In other words, if you've only been married for, say 6 months as of the date of birth, the judge will consider the possibility of another man being the dad. Now, if you're married 10 years as of the date of birth, then that's a different story and, as J says, hubby is the dad, flat-out. It's probably true that if the biological father doesn't attempt to exercise his paternal rights, then your husband can legally be regarded as the father by virtue of being your spouse.

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Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

I will agree, if your husband merely claims to be the father, and is listed on the birth certificate, that really is the end of it, unless the bio father contests it.

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This statement is key right here.