My wife and I have been together for 10 years. We got into an argument because she told me that she cheated (and I cheated on her more) on me and she said that I was not big enough for her anymore. Now, I've always known that I was not big (5 inches) but I made up for it in other ways, and it didn't affect my ego. And for a very long time we both agree that we had a spark between us. I know that sounds very immature but we did have a spark. Now that spark is gone because I can't focus on the experience. Every since she told me that I am too little for her, myself esteem is in the dumps. We can be in the middle of having sex and I'll think about what she said and I'll go limp. Sex is a very important issue in our relationship and I'm afraid that if I don't fix my ego or my penis we are going to be miserable

Maybe her real issue isn't that you are too small, but that she's way too big? And isn't woman enough to admit it. And yeah a woman can get really loose if she lacks muscle tone down there.

If she worked on resolving THAT, she could be happy with a pencil.


One thing is for sure... she is pretty damn rude. I bet she'd really love it if you harped about her saggy boobs or butt... or flabby belly. Exactly how would that be any different?

Next time she says that... I'd tell her " THAT might not be an issue if I didn't have to stap a 2X4 to my butt to keep from falling in."

All you would be doing is highlighting her rude comment with a like reply. Maybe THAT will make her see how rude her comment was.

Maybe the problem is that neither of you trusts the other after so much cheating?

Hard to be intimate and truly enjoy someone who you can't trust.

Get counseling for yourself esteem, and accept that the relationship is over and move on.

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Originally Posted by Synnen

Maybe the problem is that neither of you trusts the other after so much cheating?

Hard to be intimate and truly enjoy someone who you can't trust.

Get counseling for your self esteem, and accept that the relationship is over and move on.

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Yeah, they need help, both were cheating on each other and its degenerating to personal jabs... its heading in the wrong way really fast.

So she cheated and you cheated on her more.

I don't think it's the size of your penis that's at issue here - it's the disconnect between you. No wonder there is no spark, it doesn't sound as if you like each other very much any more.

Stop the cheating and get to counselling if you want to save the marriage. Reigniting the spark takes honesty, maturity and commitment. Sounds like you luck out on all three.