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-   -   Awkward pressence (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=420875)

  • Nov 30, 2009, 11:13 PM
    HalfDeadCrush
    Awkward pressence
    The other day I decided to tell my mum that I was bi,
    She took it pretty well,
    But 1 day after I told her she started to question that she brought me up wrong because of her experience with men, and there is more than one really bad experience that has happened.
    She told me that she thought I told her everything and how can she trust me now after I've lied to her these 15 years.
    But later that night we sorted everything out
    But there is still a really big ukwardness between us now
    I have gotten a lot off my chest and I feel so much better but
    Our realationship just isn't the same anymore. How can I get things back to the way it was?
  • Nov 30, 2009, 11:17 PM
    mudweiser

    To be honest, you won't get things the way back to they way "they were".

    Right now your mom is simply "processing" what you just told her. Give her some time she will come around!

    If anything TALK to her about it-- that you feel this tension between the two of you.

    Good luck!
  • Dec 1, 2009, 06:19 AM
    Jake2008

    It is a shock. The person you raised, is not the person you thought she was, and most likely the territory is unknown to her.

    She will have a lot of questions. Luckily there are a lot of resources to help both of you. Here's one with some good information:

    Resources for Parents of Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgendered Youth
  • Dec 1, 2009, 11:47 PM
    Gemini54
    You can't expect things to go back to normal overnight. She now knows something about you that she didn't before and she needs to think about it and integrate it.

    She's your mother and it might take her a while to sort through her own feelings and thoughts about it. I wouldn't push the issue by telling her you feel tension.

    Give her some time and in the meantime, try to be as 'normal' as you can!

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