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My boyfriend and I have had sex PLENTY of times we even have a baby together I love to have sex with him but Im always too scared to start it off. I want to know what's the best or easiest way for me to overcome this fear? He gets really mad and now doesn't really come at me first to have sex we have talked about it I just for some reason can't do it can you please help me so I can better to satisfy him like he does me.
What is your age, what are you "scared" of
Im 18 years old. Im not really sure what I am scared of just sometimes I feel that if I go to have sex with him what if he doesn't want it? Then I've made a fool of myself. I just need to know what to do to overcome it
How old is your boyfriend?
Have you told him that you are afraid of being rejected?
Has he ever rejected any overtures that you have made for things like cuddling or just playing around with no sex involved?
I think you need to sit down and be honest about being afraid and that you are going to need his help over-coming that fear.
Start with initiating small things like cuddling and let them build into playing around and intercourse.
He is 19.
No I have never told him I am afraid of being rejected I think it may be our past.
But, like when I dress in front of him I know he likes it but I guess he's not used to it so he says oo what are you doing or look at you, then I say OK then if you don't want me to I won't then he says stuff like shut up or something and smiles. He wants me to watch pornos so I can be like those girls I just feel low because of it. I want to be like that for him. I know he wants sex he's 19 and a guy I'm just so scared to start it off. We talk about it and I say sometimes I don't think you like to have sex with me he says no its not that I'm just tired of always coming on to you first, and I understand but a lot I've worked on, we cuddle ALL the time so that's NOT a problem I just want help so I can overcome this fear.
If you've had a child with him and he's still having sex with you then you shouldn't be worried.
He loves you. If doesn't want to have sex at that point in time so what? Try again later.
Besides most guy will even have sex when they are dead sick and super tired. Make the right moves, say the right things, touch him in the right places and he's up and ready to go.
I know I know. I really wish that it was a lot easier.
I'm just scared and I Don't KNOW WHY!!
I'm just scared to look dumb.
But deep down I know I'm not, going too.
When he starts to fall asleep I want too and I try to wake him up but he says WHY were not doing anything then I say I have to BEG you to stay awake then he says I'm not begging in the right way.
I know this I just don't know how to overcome this fear.
Then when I said I think you'd rather sleep instead he says yeah because were not doing anything but watching TV
Nah it's not dumb, but you should just push yourself to do it. It's really not that big of a deal. Child birth is a lot harder than putting the moves on your man ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by his_wifey2009
Common' now. Buck up and go get 'em.
If your looking to spend the rest of your life with him then you should really be able to talk to him about these things.
Once your in bed start touching him and just go for it. Go down on him and surprise him! It'll be hard to say no once you've already started ;)
--well that's just what I would do anyway.
Your sooo right I just have to push myself in to it. I love him with all my heart we been together over a yr and we have a 1 month old. Thanks everyone this last person was TOTALLY right.
You have a ONE month old baby? Has your doctor cleared you for having sex?
NOO NOO NOO we haven't had sex since we had our baby
Cat is right! Has your doctor said it's okay to have sex now? Talk to him first!
No we haven't had sex since before I had her
What?Quote:
Originally Posted by his_wifey2009
Have you been to the doctors? What did the doctor say to you?
Good. It is always best to wait until your doctor says that everything is okay.
Once you are cleared, I think you will be okay if you just relax. It sounds like timing might be part of the problem. That is something that you will have to be patient with each other about especially with the baby making her own demands on time.
However, make sure that you use birth control and use it correctly. You and your body do not need another child in the next year,
You got that right..!
But we know we don't want ANY more
At least not right now!
ANY more chat speak in this thread will cause the entire thread to be deleted.
If you are an adult, you can TYPE like an adult.
My boyfriend says no to my advances more than he has accepted them(not a libido thing, just long hours and stress). I was very scared for a while to advance first. Now I test the waters. Do something first to see if he is interested, before putting yourself out there. A nice long hard kiss is a perfect way to test. If he is interested, you will definitely know after that.
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