Ask Me Help Desk - I need my Ex Back

Just recently my girlfriend broke up with me. We have been together for 2 years. Everything was going well one day, the next day we didn't hang out and she ended up talking to her friends. They told her that I was worthless, and that she needs to find someone better. She was my everything, and I can't get over her, and I don't want to. Even though I did cheat. I love her so much. I didn't mean to do it. I know that she wants to be with me but her friends don't want her to. It has been the best 2 years of my life, and I know she wants to be with me, she always looks at me in the hallway. I know what I did was wrong, and stupid. But it made me realize something. Which is a good thing. I would do anything to get her back. I lost my mom when I was 16. And she can relate with me on that whenever I wanted to talk about it she would. It has only been a few days and she wants to date one of my best friends. Ive tried everything from a dozen roses to cards. I cry myself to sleep every single night. I don't want to eat or talk to anyone at school. I have lost 12 pounds in 4 days. I don't know what to do with myself. She cheated on me like a year ago and I forgave her. Please can someone help me out.

Lots going on here... and it isn't pretty.

See - "Even though i did cheat." - not good. Sorry, but I wouldn't want to be with you either. That's really selfish.

The TRUST was broken.

Cards and roses NEVER work - you need to STOP all contact - don't call her!! Don't!! No contact will help you get over her - I doubt she comes back.

You need to work on yuorself and see why you cheated. Forget her.

You put all this importance into her and then cheated on her?

See - they are part of your life not your lfe. You feel this way because you put too much inportance in her.

I'd move on - there will be other women to cheat on.

I feel your pain and trust me you are not alone. Everyone in the relationship forum has been through that pain, some a lot more than once. I won't sugar coat this but I am not trying to be cruel, but your post sounds like you depend on this female way too much for it to be healthy. Two years is long enough to know what you want in a relationship and until you except the fact that she has ended it for whatever reason, then you will be miserable. Blaming friends badmouthing you will also do you no good and it still hides the fact that this was her decision and hers alone. Face the fact that after 2 years she wants to move on. It will take time to get control over your emotions so don't go whining and crying and begging for another chance as that will not work and you will be even more miserable. Leave her alone and work on getting over her and building a life without her. I wish you luck.

I don't like the cheating part - like it's no big deal - deal breaker in every relationship.

Of course her friends don't like you.

I am being blunt because I don't want you screw up in your next relationship! I don't want you to cheat ever again. This one is done.

Sorry Jordan, I have to agree with WC on this one.

I have to ask, if you really loved her so much, why did you cheat? Cheating is not love.

You didn't mean to do it? Was it an accident? Did you accidentally fall into bed and your... well, never mind, don't want to get to graphic.

So, what exactly did you mean to do when you did the deed with the other girl?

You broke her trust and her friends helped her realise that you were not true to her.

You need to cut off all communication, period. Let her live a life that is healthy and free of wondering if she has contracted an STD because her boyfriend did not mean to cheat.

Yep, I can understand your pain as everyone here can.

But don't blame her friends. If she really wanted to be with you she would. They wouldn't convince her other wise.

You cheated and lost her trust. It is very hard, impossible in fact to have a healthy relationship with no trust.

You need to cut all contact and work on yourself. Work out why you cheated. You have leanrt a very powerful lesson here. Or at least I hope you have.

Crying, begging, pleading, letters, roses won't get her back. You need to cut contact now and begin healing. Grieve, be upset but you need to start to move on and except that it is over.

Not what you wanted to hear but the sooner you realise this the better it will start to get.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wildcat21

I don't like the cheating part - like it's no big deal - deal breaker in every realtionship.

Of course her friends don't like you.

I am being blunt because I don't want you screw up in your next relationship! I don't want you to cheat ever again. This one is done.

He also posted that she cheated on him too.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jordan Van de Voort

Just recently my girlfriend broke up with me. We have been together for 2 years. Everything was going well one day, the next day we didnt hang out and she ended up talking to her friends. They told her that i was worthless, and that she needs to find someone better. She was my everything, and i can't get over her, and i dont want to. Even though i did cheat. I love her so much. I didnt mean to do it. I know that she wants to be with me but her friends dont want her to. It has been the best 2 years of my life, and i know she wants to be with me, she always looks at me in the hallway. I know what i did was wrong, and stupid. But it made me realize something. Which is a good thing. I would do anything to get her back. I lost my mom when i was 16. And she can relate with me on that whenever i wanted to talk about it she would. It has only been a few days and she wants to date one of my best friends. Ive tried everything from a dozen roses to cards. I cry myself to sleep every single night. I dont want to eat or talk to anyone at school. I have lost 12 pounds in 4 days. I dont know what to do with myself. She cheated on me like a year ago and i forgave her. Please can someone help me out.

Her friends don't lyk you because you hurt her because you prob upset er when you cheated and it is tru to a gal when there giy cheats then there not worth it which is tru because if you can do it once you can do it agen. You need to let her no in every way you can that you love her and are sorry and u MUSTTTT not do it 2 er agen. Mayb buy her sme chocolates and a rose and card! But if she decided to move on that was yr mistakre not hers it serves you ryt.

Sorry, Mo, yes he did say that, but I believe the post was revised. I do not remember reading that the first time. I could be wrong, but he may have edited his post to include that later.

Cuppycake, while your advice may be pretty good, it is hard to read. Please answer in complete english rather than text-speak. This is not a cell phone and we really do not "text" here. It's just kind of hard for some of us old folks to understand.