Ask Me Help Desk - Leave alone or educate?

I have a 7/8 week old kitten, whenever she starts to chew on cables or hide behind chairs where I don't want her to go behind I say "no" and move her away from the cables or chair. My partner tells me this is wrong and I shoiuld just let her do what she wants, but I am worried that if I do not tell her no she will get hurt and also that she will do these things when she is older which would mean attacking peoples feet, getting stuck behind and inside lounges, biting through cables etc, my question is do you agree with me or my partner? To leave her alone and let her learn for herself? Or tell her no and move her away from the problem so that rather than her working out what to do in the situation she simply knows not to get into the situation?

EDUCATE. You are her 'mother' now and will be teaching her what she needs to know to 'survive' in her environment.

If your partner has a problem with educating, bring up the fact the chewing on wires is an extremely common way for kittens to get severely injured if not killed. Wires and cables can "bite" back. Also, this is the age where you teach the kitten where it is okay to sharpen claws and where it isn't. That is unless your partner wants all of the furniture and walls shredded.

I do have a question, how does your partner think she learned how to use a litter box?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cat1864

EDUCATE. You are her 'mother' now and will be teaching her what she needs to know to 'survive' in her environment.

If your partner has a problem with educating, bring up the fact the chewing on wires is an extremely common way for kittens to get severely injured if not killed. Wires and cables can "bite" back. Also, this is the age where you teach the kitten where it is okay to sharpen claws and where it isn't. That is unless your partner wants all of the furniture and walls shredded.

I do have a question, how does your partner think she learned how to use a litter box?

Thank you for agreeing with me :) I have explained this to my partner and he still feels that he is right, I could be because the kitten used the litter tray straight away without us needing to tell her. I teach her not to scratch at things like lounges and he thinks I am silly and should let her learn for herself (strange how when she started chewing up his boots he stopped her but when she ripsup the lounge I brought he thinks its mean to stop her) but because he doesn't stop her she forgets all that I have taught her about not hiding behind the lounge and scratching things.

The litter box argument can be countered with: Her mother was an indoor cat (probably). She (and the person who owned mom and the litter of kittens) taught her about litter boxes before you got her. You probably showed her where the litter box in your house is and that was enough to reinforce mom's lessons of how to potty and cover it up.

It sounds like he doesn't understand that her instinct will tell her hide, claw, bite, scratch and that it is up to her 'parents' to teach when and where those things are appropriate. When we take a kitten from its mother, we are taking on the parental role of teacher. You might try likening it to raising a human child. There are things that children learn on their own through watching adults and trial and error, however, there is much more that they learn including when it is appropriate to do something from actual lessons and behavior modification.

The big lesson that he needs to help you teach her is the one about wires. It doesn't take much for a kitten to get seriously hurt from electricity. If he doesn't understand the damage she could do to her health, would he understand that she could be creating a fire hazard by chewing/clawing wires and damaging their insulation or pulling them partially out of the outlet? Plus the added cost of replacing the cables and wires she destroys.

I don't know if it might help you, but I have had good results with my cat and the cardboard scratching pads. She likes lying on them almost as much as she likes clawing on them.

Cat1864 has already brought up good points, but I'd like to add a few.

For one, cats takes to litter boxes quite naturally. I doubt it even matters if mom already taught them as a kitten. It seems to be where they prefer going for the most part. (There are exceptions.) It's nature for cats to have to pee and poop and to want an appropriate place to do it, and even natural for them to cover it up.

It is NOT natural to be around wires and other human things. Those aren't in nature. She is also in your home now, and I think it's a bit naïve to think a cat is going to learn "on her own." She's not a human. Cats do not realize that certain behaviors are bad unless you teach them.

And this isn't just about wires (which can hurt/kill them) or scratching up furniture or eating a plant that turns out to be poisonous. This includes if you don't want them on your counters and into your food or peeing on your bed (which could happen even if she's good with the litter box) or biting and scratching you, or if you don't want her on certain furniture or in your bed, or outside, or any other different behaviors. Some of them are just "bad" (like wires and ruining your stuff) and some of them will be things that you choose as appropriate behaviors for your household. Just as you would choose appropriate behaviors for a child.

Like a cat is not going to realize on their own that they aren't supposed to get into your dinner plate that is sitting on the table. I mean, why should a cat understand that? I'm not concerned about agreeing with you -- partner just seems plain ignorant about cats. They do need to be taught. Scolding with a NO or the good old squirt bottle works well. A loud clap even. They don't like loud stuff. Those things won't hurt them, but will either create an unpleasant association or at least give them a clue it's inappropriate.

I much prefer cats be able to do as they please and remain independent. However, I do have to keep mine away from certain things and don't want my house destroyed. So there are certain inappropriate behaviors that must be learned in my house, and they have also learned to be on my schedule (relatively)... but they still remain fairly free.

This also isn't going to scar her for life or something. At the same time, when she's being appropriate, you give love and attention, and she'll know she's loved even when you have to scold her for something else.

Thank you morgaine300 and everyone for the advice I have found some cat repellant spray to use on the wires and areas I don't want her to get too. That way she learns without me needing to even say anything :)