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-   -   Divorce after 2 years (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=411670)

  • Nov 1, 2009, 09:42 AM
    nataliacc
    Divorce after 2 years
    Hi, I had been married for 2 years now, we had a lot of problems before in our relationship, but I got pregnant and we thought that getting married was the best thing to do for us and the baby (at lease I tough that). To be very honest I think he only married me because of the baby, but I didn't got pregnant in purpose, it just happened.
    I think that I still love him, but because of soooo many things that happened to us the love it seams to be so tinny that I can't see it no more like before. We had been through so much even got involve in fighting physically, but we thought things Will get bettter.. and they got a little bit better but I think it's not enough.
    Now we don't fight as before, but there is a negative vibe in my home, sometimes that makes me fell that in any moment a bomb will explote... and I'm afraid for my daughter to be in the middle of everything.
    He never mentioned a divorce but yesterday, he did over a nothing a very stupid fight, but I now he really mean it, So I'm thinking it to, I know maybe we should try more, but alone I can't, and he will refuse to see any help, I already suggest it but he will never accept any Martial help (that's one of his feturs... "he's always right, and need no help").
    So my biggest concern is my daughter, how she will be affected in all this, I want the custody but of cause I want her to see her father, what about child support? How this thinks work?? I don't want to hurt him in any way, I wish we could set thing friendly but I know us, and know that any divorce is no easy, and I want protection for my daughter that's why I fell I should get legal help.
    Anybody could advice me? Please? I'm really clueless about this matters.
    Thank you very much
  • Nov 1, 2009, 07:35 PM
    Jake2008
    You have to slow down, and take one step at a time.

    The first priority is the safety of your daughter, who is living in a very dangerous environment, and your safety. It is important that you find your way to a shelter, or to another safe place such as a relatives or friends.

    Go and seek aid, and speak to an attorney who can advise you on custody, and how to file for support.

    Speak to a counsellor at your local welfare office for interim assistance and financial aid if you need to, and ask about information on counselling for battered women, and other resources that you will need such as assistance with education, job training, etc. There are many women's organizations that are more than capable of helping you remain safe, and assisting you through the transition to becoming a single mom, and self-supporting.

    It is a very clear option for you, should you choose to go that route, and I hope you do. You are wise to put your daughter first, and realize that her health, emotionally and physically, depends entirely on the decisions you make now. Both your futures are in your hands, and there are resources out there to help you make it.

    Please do not think for a moment that you have to live the way you do. Thousands of women have been where you are now, and have found their way, with help, to healthy and productive lives.

    Please think about getting the help you need.

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