Hello everyone,what does it mean when a girl says to you"we are not breaking up but Im stressed out because my family is over seas and my mum is sick. I have so much things going around inside my head but I think we should slow it down"

We just got back from 15 days together driving up to cairns the driving back to Melbourne slowly stopping in every town on the way. When we got back to Melbourne that's when she said the stuff above.

She texted me last night to see how's everything is going so I text back saying everything is fine. (was that the right thing to do?)

How long should I give her to think (my little brother who been in this mess said give it a month)

Is she breaking up with me or what? Please help
Thanks :):(:confused:

How long have you been involved with her? And, slow it down from what level? Have you been asking her to marry you?

It means exactly what she said: she is stressed out and wants to slow it down.
She never said she was stressed out because of YOU, she said that it was because of her family and her mom being sick. So don't get all worked up now. Give her some time to take a breath. Keeping a relationship and dealing with family issues is tough. By what she has told you: no she does not want to break up with you, she just wants a break. She wants to slow things down because she is stressed out. If you have any other questions about it you need to ask HER. It shouldn't hurt anything to just ask.

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Originally Posted by rockie100

How long have you been involved with her? And, slow it down from what level? Have you been asking her to marry you?

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Ive been seeing her for about 6 months and no I haven't told her that I love or want to merry her but. I think I have been going to fast.

Thank you for your advice

Well then if you agree, with her, that it has been going quite fast. Then all you can do is be supportive. She might be trying to handle more than she can take right now. Tell her how you feel. And then take a few steps back. Time will tell all.

Give her some time and be supportive. Apologize for moving too fast and then TAKE IT SLOW.

Support her in her time of need, no matter what. Don't worry about the relationship, that will work itself out. The last thing you should be is NEEDY, which is selfish on your part.

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Originally Posted by talaniman

Support her in her time of need, no matter what. Don't worry about the relationship, that will work itself out. The last thing you should be is NEEDY, which is selfish on your part.

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Im 37 and haven't been in many relationships in my life time.I told her that she can call me anytime my phone is always on so I will surport her... A really good friend of mine (also a girl) said that she might be in love with me and need time to think if she is or not... What do you think.

I don't know, but I do know that family problems can be distracting, and eye opening, and very stressful. If you add to the stress, your out for sure.

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Originally Posted by talaniman

I don't know, but I do know that family problems can be distracting, and eye opening, and very stressful. If you add to the stress, your out for sure.

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Thanks for this one but Im going to play it buy ear... She knows Im here for her if she needs me and I will surport her in every way I can. But Im not going to have any contact with her until she gets back in touch with me... She has to do this on her own not because I want her to... But Im not waiting forever...
Thank you everyone for your advice and I will keep you posted on this but in the mean time still write things here to help other people in this mess.

When my female is in need, I try to be useful, not ignore her. You know she is down, and needs support, why wait for her to ask for it. Give her a day or two, and see how she is, ask about her mom, and be a good listener. That's my idea of love and support, not sulking in a corner, waiting for her to show you some attention. That's just me though, but abandoning a partner when they need something to get them through a hard time, is NOT support. I guarantee, that's as bad as adding stress to her life. My gosh man, if she is worth it you make adjustments that let her know that your slowing things down, as she wants. You just got back from a more than two week vacation, and she has issues to catch up with. She has to adjust, let her, but don't abandon her. That's uncaring, and selfish, just because you don't understand what she needs.

Slowing down, doesn't mean stop.

She knows that you're available to support her and she knows how to contact you. So just do your own thing and let her sort out her problems. If you want, you can check on her every few days to remind her that you're still available as her support system, but don't push her to talk about your relationship.

Once she's figured things out, she will look for you and then you can pick up your relationship from where you left off.