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-   -   My girlfriend of 3 years cheated on me. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=409183)

  • Oct 24, 2009, 09:25 AM
    BBOXER5
    My girlfriend of 3 years cheated on me.
    Hi I've been going out with my girlfriend for 3 years and she cheated on me with a guy in Uni. I love her to bits and we have an absolutely great relationship. This guy that she kissed is doing the same course as her and he has a girlfriend aswel. There only in 1st yr so they'l b around each oter for the next 4 yrs. She said she got really drunk and that they were only kissing for a few minutes. She told me straight away when she saw me (which was 2 days later) and she was crying a lot saying how sorry she was. I still love her but I'm finding it really hard to accept that she was wit another guy... What should I do!? Please help...
  • Oct 24, 2009, 02:02 PM
    Bonita--
    I'm sorry that this happened to you. It's a tough situation because you love her but she has broken your heart and your trust, possibly forever. Whether you stay with her or not, it depends on whether you think you can get past this. Can you ever trust her again? Can you forgive her? Can you handle her being around the guy that she cheated with? These are questions you need to ask yourself. I suggest you have a talk with her, tell her how you're feeling and tell her that you need time to think. Take sometime and think about whether you believe you can get through this. See how you feel in a week and two from now because it is still fresh in your mind. Also, I just want to add that the whole "I was really drunk" thing is an excuse. No matter how drunk you are, you still know what you're doing, so don't believe that excuse.

    Anyway, as I said take sometime to think about it because it's still fresh and you may feel differently about the situation in a few weeks time. I hope that everything works out for you.
  • Oct 24, 2009, 02:20 PM
    I wish
    No trust = no relationship

    In addition to getting some distance from her so that you can reflect on what happened, you need to decide whether to give her another chance to earn your trust back.

    If you're not satisfied with her progress in earning your trust back, then it's time to call it quits.
  • Oct 24, 2009, 02:44 PM
    slapshot_oi
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by BBOXER5 View Post
    ...She said she got really drunk nd that they were only kissing for a few mins.

    I hope she didn't expect you to believe that. She wouldn't cry as hard as you say she did if she just kissed him.

    She cheated on you and is now lying to you. First thing to do is get a blood panel.

    Break up with her, for the obvious reason but also because she just started college, and college and relationships are oil and water.
  • Oct 24, 2009, 03:35 PM
    talaniman
    She gave in to her drunken passion, okay, if you forgive her, see if she still drinks, and puts herself in those positions again, so while your hurt and confused, pay attention, so you can see if she is remorseful, and doing the right things to get your trust back, or just repeating a bad pattern. You don't get to keep bringing it up and revisiting your hurt over this if you forgive.

    If you can't forgive her, and work to get beyond this, I think you break this off, and leave her alone.
  • Oct 24, 2009, 08:59 PM
    paxe

    I got cheated also with my girlfriend of 3 years. If I were you I would break it off, once a cheater always a cheater. I don't trust her excuse.
  • May 20, 2012, 09:07 AM
    jayson1993
    This happened to me. Last year. I'm still with her but I have no trust for her and nor will I ever. I'm always thinking of it. Every time I see the guy and here his name. It pops back in my head. It's something you don't forget. I wish I would have just broke up with her forever. There are so many other girls out there. I have not cheated ever in three years and she has twice. Don't make the mistake I did. I find myself regretting not breaking up with her. Because after there first time there was a second I'm waiting on a third. I have no trust for her and I'm lifeless. There's no cheer in our relationship unless were together because I can't trust her. I hate her. I wish it was easy to end it but it's not. I hate her I hate her I hate her. Don't make the mistake from one guy to another there's more girls out there. So many more girls I just wish I had the guts to end it for good.

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