I am 34 years old. Have been divorced for 11. Since then, I have had only 2 serious relationships. Otherwise it has mostly been flings or "friends with benefits". My problem is, I do seriously want to be in a committed relationship but I have a lot of guy friends. And yes, most of them I have been with intimately. Every time I get close to someone that is looking for the same things I am, they end up having a problem with all my guy friends. I am not a cheater. But am I wrong to think that having guy friends is OK? Is this why I have so much trouble finding the right guy? Some of these guys are very very important to me. I'd hate to have to end friendships to be in a relationship.

Guy friends are great, but you just have to prove to your man that they are just friends. Trust is KEY to a good relationship. Otherwise keep in mind that he might also have some girls as friends. So tell him to put the shoe on the othe foot. You must make yourself come first.

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Originally Posted by KatieK

Guy friends are great, but you just have to prove to your man that they are just friends. Trust is KEY to a good relationship. Otherwise keep in mind that he might also have some girls as friends. So tell him to put the shoe on the othe foot. you must make yourself come first.

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That's what I was thinking. Thank you. That's why I've always been honest from the start about my guy friends. Seems like at first they think its OK until I actually spend time with my friends when he's not around. It has nothing to do with who I'd rather spend time with. Its just like hanging out with a girlfriend to me.

Will that mite be one way to decide if you've foud the right guy or not if your with I guy who really loves you and trusts you then he wouldn't care if all your guy friends were nudists lol if there is no trust in a relationship its not a good relationship :)

Do the guys you date know that you have been intimate with your guy friends? Or do they just see guy friends and instantly have a problem with it?

I guess I don't come rite out and say that I've been intimate with them. If they ask, I'm honest about it.

Personally I wouldn't be bothered by it but a lot of guys are. I don't think you should give up your friends. Hopefully you will find a guy who will accept it for what it is.