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-   -   Is this a mistake? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=40419)

  • Nov 2, 2006, 09:49 AM
    jane609
    Is this a mistake?
    If somesome suffered from miscarrige, is it something that the person should keep it discreet and only tell people who are close?
    I suffered from one recently, and I work with a group of people where except one all of them all are man, and I first told my manager who is female about my condition, later on I sent mail to my group saying that I suffererd from miscarrige.
    Now, I feel like I made a mistake by sharing this news to the group, especially since almost all of them are man. It's killing me and I just feel like I made a big mistake, and doen't feel like going to work and face those people as this news is very personal and should be shared in person not brodacasting in the group.

    Please I;m very disturbed.. what should I do? Do man mind if I share this kind of information? Is it unprofessional and unpolite?

    Thanks
  • Nov 2, 2006, 09:53 AM
    J_9
    Well, it is not something you just go up to someone and say, "hey I had a miscarriage."

    That kind of info is pretty much kept private unless the topic comes up in a discussion.

    Out of curiosity, why did you do that?
  • Nov 2, 2006, 09:56 AM
    jane609
    I'm just going through difficult time , my mind is not working functionality as my harmone level is going down, I didn't sleep for two days.. I'm vey confused.

    I'm just not thinking right, hence at that moment I thought this is the right thing but now I'm regressting a lot!!
  • Nov 2, 2006, 11:05 AM
    helper123
    Well, maybe looking back on it, it wasn't the best idea, but it's done now so you can't change it. If you explain that to your colleagues, of even if you don't, I'm sure they'll be very understanding of what you're going through. Good luck with this!

    Xo
  • Nov 2, 2006, 12:45 PM
    Depressed in MO
    However, were these colleagues of yours- your friends? If you all share other personal life stories, whether they are funny, sad, serious, or whatever-then maybe that is why you felt the need to share. I wouldn't say that you made a mistake, unless you barely knew any of these people. Then what you did would cause awkwardness, but if these people are your friends, then they may feel sincere towards it, not weird.
  • Nov 2, 2006, 01:16 PM
    giggles
    Maybe you regret letting everyone know, but your hormones have been all over the place, you have suffered a loss, and perhaps you felt the need to share where you have been at with people.
    The fact that you call them "the group" implies you are closer than most work colleagues. I have worked with women who have had miscarriages, and some have disclosed it and some have not. It's your business to share as you feel fit. If you feel a bit raw about it, why not send another (brief!) mail explaining you felt you needed to explain where your head was at, that you made the decision to let people know in case you were acting a little out of sorts, that you are managing just fine, and are back to work as normal.
    Or you can just concentrate on moving on, and not worrying about having regrets. Good luck xx

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