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-   -   Do condoms make sex less pleasurable for men? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=403447)

  • Oct 6, 2009, 10:06 PM
    sandalwood7
    Do condoms make sex less pleasurable for men?
    This is a simple question. Do condoms make sex less pleasurable for men? I really need to know how much of a problem this can be for a man. Should a man be understanding enough to wear a condom if other forms of contraception are not an option? In a long term relationship is it unreasonable to expect condom use? Is sex with a condom better than no sex at all? Do condoms hurt? Is there anything that someone can do to make using condoms not such a big deal? I don't feel comfortable not using condoms when I can't afford to get pregnant. Also would rather be safe until sti checkups complete. I would really appreciate honest answers... especially from men.
  • Oct 6, 2009, 10:31 PM
    KISS
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by ;
    This is a simple question. Do condoms make sex less pleasurable for men?

    Yes (same goes for women) Although men and women can have the fear of pregnancy thus without it can be less pleasurable. So it can go both ways. Condoms cut down on sensitivity. Sometimes good. Sometimes bad. Both answers are correct. If you ask, "Does sex feel better without a condom?" then the answer is yes.


    Quote:

    I really need to know how much of a problem this can be for a man. Should a man be understanding enough to wear a condom if other forms of contraception are not an option?
    Yes, but he tends to think with the little head.

    Quote:

    In a long term relationship is it unreasonable to expect condom use?
    Long-term vs trusted monogomous relationship. Again many men think with the little head. What's long term - 6 mo or 5 years.

    Quote:

    Is sex with a condom better than no sex at all?
    Yes.

    Quote:

    Do condoms hurt?
    No

    Quote:

    Is there anything that someone can do to make using condoms not such a big deal?
    Yep, have the female put it on as part of the lovemaking process.

    Quote:

    I dont feel comfortable not using condoms when I can't afford to get pregnant. Also would rather be safe until sti checkups complete. I would really appreciate honest answers..... especially from men.
    Yep.
  • Oct 6, 2009, 10:38 PM
    sandalwood7

    BF says he doesn't feel like having sex much now and condoms are 50% of the problem. He said he would rather not be bothered with the hassle. He says they hurt but I buy special xxlarge condoms for his x-large penis which fit pretty good I thought. I can't take the pill because of medical reasons. I always put the condom on and try to do it quickly and without a big hassle and give him head at the same time to keep him hard.
    I really don't know what to do now. We are 10 months into a relationship.
  • Oct 6, 2009, 11:57 PM
    KISS

    Female condom?

    The Female Condom
  • Oct 7, 2009, 01:02 AM
    jmjoseph
    Yes, it does cut down on the pleasure of sex. However,they are always better than the alternative.
  • Oct 7, 2009, 01:45 AM
    mudweiser
    1 Attachment(s)

    How about an IUD?

    Can you take the depovera shot?


    -- personally, I feel like the female condom is a major turn off. It's so huge and feels like a garbage bag for your vagina.


    More disadvantages:
    • he outer ring or frame is visible outside the vagina, which can make some women feel self-conscious
    • female condoms can make noises during intercourse (adding more lubricant can lessen this problem)
    • Some women find the female condom hard to insert and to remove
    • It has a higher failure rate in preventing pregnancy than non-barrier methods such as the pill
    • It is relatively expensive and relatively limited in availability in some countries
    • It is recommended that the female condom be used only once


    Here are other contraceptive methods:

    Also see: Pros and Cons of Different Contraception

    Sarah
  • Oct 7, 2009, 02:46 AM
    sandalwood7

    Oh my god! That female condom is scary! Thanks guys for your advice...
  • Oct 7, 2009, 05:12 AM
    smoothy
    From a guys perspective. Condoms DO reduce pleasure.

    However, the reality of sex in the last 30 years since AIDS came onto the scene as well as herpes... unless you are married and faithful they are an absolute MUST USE. People are rarely honest with where they have played and with who. And odds are you have forgotten about a person before you would even find out you contracted AIDS from them... long incubation period means its near impossible to know who you got it from unless they were the ONLY person you slept with. And you will never know thos the people they slept with had slept with... and you see the logrithmic progression there.

    So wearing a raincoat is important in some cases and better than spanking the monkey. Even before you consider the pregnancy aspect.
  • Oct 7, 2009, 05:18 AM
    redhed35

    Some of the ribbed condoms can be quite pleasurable,there is such a massive range on the market,flavoured included..

    However I have never come across a man who decided against having sex because he did not want to wear a condom.

    A diafram (sp) may be a solution,if your in a long term relationship.
  • Oct 7, 2009, 07:22 AM
    Synnen

    Let me put it this way:

    If you don't want to get pregnant, he should be taking at LEAST half the steps to prevent pregnancy.

    A condom is NOT a hassle. Believe me--a NEWBORN is a hassle.

    No glove = no love.

    PS--you're only 10 months in. Ditch this guy and find someone who cares more about YOU than about whether sex feels better without a condom. No guy that ever really cared for me EVER put up a fuss about wearing one.
  • Oct 7, 2009, 07:31 AM
    ScottGem

    Its been mentioned before in this thread, but I wanted to reiterate it. A major portion of sexual gratification is mental, its not only physical. Therefore, fear of pregnancy or STDs can certainly put as much, if not more of a damper on sexual pleasure than wearing a condom.
  • Oct 7, 2009, 08:46 AM
    Catsmine
    Additional water based lubricant inside the condom can increase the sensation for the male somewhat, although not to the point of not being able to tell the difference. As for condoms vs. no sex, I own stock in Trojans and I'll BUY MORE!

    If he can't deal, rather than it being a rhetorical tactic, then check his medicine cabinet for anti-virals he's already on.
  • Oct 7, 2009, 09:27 AM
    smoothy
    I'm married... I don't have to... nyah nyah nyah... :D

    But seriously... If I was single today I'd use them faithfully. Too much out there to catch to take the chance these days... not to mention the screaming kid potiential.
  • Oct 7, 2009, 11:15 AM
    Fr_Chuck

    First no one method of birth control is 100 percent, so even with others, if you really don't want to be a parent, using a condom while also not 100 percent helps lowers the odds when used with other forms of birth control.

    Next unless you are in a very long term relationship and both you and your partner have been tested, there are a lot of things out there, some don't even show up for months.

    There are many types of condoms, from colors to flavors, ( can anyone say french vanilla) and there are many types of all of those.

    On top of that, the tightness of the codom, could perhaps help lenghten the performance slightly. The same idea of the use of the rings.

    And at the end of the day, still better than no sex even if you hate them.
  • Oct 7, 2009, 07:56 PM
    dguerr
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by smoothy View Post
    From a guys perspective. Condoms DO reduce pleasure.

    However, the reality of sex in the last 30 years since AIDS came onto the scene as well as herpes...unless you are married and faithful they are an absolute MUST USE. People are rarely honest with where they have played and with who. And odds are you have forgotten about a person before you would even find out you contracted AIDS from them.....long incubation period means its near impossible to know who you got it from unless they were the ONLY person you slept with. And you will never know thos the people they slept with had slept with....and you see the logrithmic progression there.

    So wearing a raincoat is important in some cases and better than spanking the monkey. Even before you consider the pregnacy aspect.

    You know, if you were my daughter, sister or a good female friend, I would definitely tell you to follow the above advice. Why? (1) Ten months into a relationship is nothing, really. Try ten years. (2) If he doesn't want to use condom now, what makes you think he did with other partners? (3) The birth control methods often are just that BIRTH control, not DISEASE prevention. There is a Web site, URL="http://secure.condomania.com" which is an online store with 1000's of condoms of all sizes and shapes, colors, scents, etc. There really won't be any excuse after seeing this Web site. If there still is, just Google Condoms for many more sites, including reliable US Government sites.

    Have fun!
  • Oct 7, 2009, 10:38 PM
    Gemini54
    My now husband used to hate wearing condoms as well.

    He said they decreased sensation and to be perfectly honest I wasn't a fan either - I thought they decreased my pleasure and I found the ribbed ones really felt like someone was mowing gravel inside my vagina.

    But what was the alternative? No thanks. So condoms it was, much to his chagrin.

    I was very lucky that my periods and ovulation were very regular so I used the Billings Method, and we only used condoms when I was ovulating.

    Could this be an alternative for you?
  • Oct 31, 2009, 06:58 PM
    JudyKayTee

    I'm surprised that a health care professional who actually counsels patients would be asking this.
  • Nov 3, 2009, 12:59 AM
    sandalwood7
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by JudyKayTee View Post
    I'm surprised that a health care professional who actually counsels patients would be asking this.

    Some stuff you don't read in medical textbooks... Medical texbooks don't talk about personal experiences. I am not a an O+G specialist. Is there some kind of witch hunt out to get me? Disappointed
  • Nov 7, 2009, 08:04 AM
    s_cianci
    Actually, in my own personal experience, it's been the women more so than the men who find condoms distasteful. I personally have no problem with them. I don't feel that they make sex any less enjoyable. Nowadays they are made from thin yet durable latex and are well-lubricated with spermicide (so the lubricant serves a double purpose.) The only real issues would be if someone has an allergy to latex ; for such a person (male or female), condoms may not be an option.
  • Nov 7, 2009, 09:17 AM
    JudyKayTee

    The UK has physicians who are known drug addicts?

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