Lately I have been feeling down that I have no girlfriends. It's not that I've never had any before, I just don't have any at the moment. All the ones I used to have have either stopped talking to me for one reason or another or just plain don't care. My four closest friends are males, including my boyfriend and I feel as though I need some more females in my life but I have trouble connecting with them. I feel as though I don't have a very large network of friends that I can rely on and most of the people I do see are friends of my boyfriends and I just feel like a tag-a-long and like I don't belong. I have tried to interact with them and show an interest in them but they never seem to respond to it.

Firstly, how old are you? This is a good time to find out about yourself. Try to find your true self and become stronger, and more confident. Learn about relationships with women- but avoid stereotypes. You never know if you'll end up with someone shy, or outgoing, adventurous, or more reserved, etc. And wait for the one! I always stress that you should wait for the one you're thinking of potentially marrying- because it's either marriage, or a break-up, there's no other option. Don't feel pressure to have a girlfriend- I didn't have my first kiss till a year ago on my 18th bday- it was over a year into a relationship w my one and only, and he was well worth the wait- plus now I don't have pain and baggage to bring into my marriage/relationship to make it more complicated. You should first become friends with females though- maybe it's not that you can't relate or connect- maybe it' them. I always found it easy to connect with guys because I have interests that are stereotypically "dude" interests (video games, shooting, archery, etc.) Most girls these days aren't like that. Find a girl that you share interests with, and you should hit it off right away.

Jaime90, I think the poster is a straight woman and means female friends - mentions having a boyfriend, so isn't looking for a romantic "girlfriend". But I think your advice about avoiding stereotypes is appropriate.

My suggestion is to not wait around to find the people you want to do things with - just do those things and the people who share the interests with you will be there. For example, way back in high school I was not too excited about the girls I met from just socializing - nothing wrong with them but I didn't connect at all with them. I joined some activities that I liked, not knowing anyone else in those activities. For example, I joined stage crew. I am not a girly girl, and this group gave me a chance to meet really nice boys (I dated some of them) but also meet other girls who weren't afraid to get their hands dirty, who were smart, witty, fun. I also joined a sport, where I met girls who shared my competitive nature.

As an adult I volunteer to help set up for my son's school dances, or to work the concession stand at his game with other parent volunteers and things like that, and I've met some really cool women who have things in common with me.

Generally though, getting out and doing things to be of service and improve yourself will put you in the company of other people, and because there's something planned that you're all working on, there's no pressure, and friendships just happen naturally if you're friendly. I've met many close friends from working situations and it didn't take much more than to let them know I was going to lunch and asked if they'd like to go, or asking for their advice on the work at hand, or otherwise opening up the conversation.

I am 20, and yes I do have a boyfriend. Sorry I wasn't very clear. Definitely after female friends. I have been backstabbed by so many friends before and I am really petrified of making new ones because I don't want the same thing to happen. Thanks for all your advice guys. :)