Why does he do this, can he change?
Well first off I know your reaction will be leave him. My best friend says this all the time. But I want to work through this and believe there is room for change. I've been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years now. I'm completely head over heels in love with him. I still get butterflys and all that mushy stuff. Now the commitment on his end is a little different. I don't think he actally considered me his girlfriend until probably a year ago. I've always had the supspicion that he has been seeing other people. I know he talks to other girls online and on the phone. I've read his texts, emails and online converstaions and he is kind of a sleeze. I've overlooked this for a long time. Out of sight out of mind basically. But recently I found out he sleep with someone else for sure in the beginning of our relationship, but granted I think he didn't consider it a "real" relationship yet. He Doesn't know I know, and I'm sure that there has been others. We have fought about this many times. He always reasures me that it doesn't mean anything and he is sorry, loves me and wants to marry me someday. But why keep doing it then? He has changed his passwords, is secretive and says I'm a crazy because I have no right to go though his stuff. I'm completely open with my phone, email etc. I have nothing to hide. I have been completely faithful to him and the thought of cheating on him makes me sick. I don't believe him cause of he lies to me all the time and hasn't been faithful to me. I'm also 8 months pregnant now. I work and go to school full time. I cook, clean, do laundry, basically all the housewife dutys. My friends refer to me as stepferd wife without the actual wife titile. I go out of my way to do nice things for him even though he very RARELY does the same. I do everything I and my power to make him happy. I even let him talk me into a 3some. I offered to let him see other people as long as he stopped lying to me. Now I have no desire to be with anyone else and I don't really like the thought of him doing it either but I'm trying to make this work. But he claims he is happy and doesn't want to sleep withother people. He is still talking to other girls and I found him on dating sites. So why is he doing this? He knows it hurts me and when I ask him why he says he doesn't know but I should have trust in him that he iwouldnt cheat on me. He has accused me of cheating on him numorous times and every time is proven wrong. Is this guilt on his part? I don't even talk to other guys cause I don't want him to feel insecure. I'm an extrealy sexual person. I love to have sex all the time so I know that its not that I don't put out. He doesn't even really seem interested in that anymore, and I get it I'm a fat cow and not as attractive as I was. But I still have feelings and needs and miss the intimacy. He says he doesn't want to sleep with me cause its weird for him but I know its cause he thinks I'm gross. How can I get him to connect with me again and help him overcome this? Why do guys do these kinds of things. Is it possible that he really does love and care for me even if he is unfaithful? Or am I just stupid? I'd love any advice or comments about this subject. I'd really like to hear a mans point of view or maybe the Psychological explanation behind this behaivor. Thanks