My boyfriend has initiated once, the first time, and that was it. I've initiated the past 3 times, we've been together about 6 weeks. I finally asked him why he doesn't initiate and he said other women have said the same thing (hmm, red flag?) some of them wanted sex every time they got together and it made him feel like he was just doing it to do it, likes that we connect on 'other levels', feels that 2 or 3 times a week is fine (although we haven't done it 2-3 times a week). When queried about what turns him on he said satisfying his partner turns him on more than anything. Now, altruistic as this sounds, I'm not sure I'm buying it. He's on high blood pressure meds, overweight, and we enjoy a few drinks with dinner, and at this point I'm wondering if maybe he's really having libido problems and just not feeling it but smoke screening with 'it's more important to me that you have a good time', and yes, thank Goddess for oral sex. It seems like this early into the game we should be ripping off each others clothes on a regular basis and I'm wondering if it's just me he's not that into because he'll joke about sex or how much he loves big breasts and has no problem regaling me with stories of past adventures, but it feels kind of like all talk and not much action. I guess I'm uncomfortable initiating all the time because I don't want to be anyone's 'mercy f-ck' and if he's not into me I don't want him doing it only for me but on the other hand I'm not ready to give up hope for a great sex life. I'm 54 and the previous boyfriend had libido problems, it was pretty frustrating at times and I'm not sure I want to tackle it again but we really do have so much fun together and enjoy each others company and I really enjoy being with him. Bottom line, is he not initiating because of fear of failure?

The only way you'll ever know is to communicate with him.

There are too many reasons that someone's libido may not be that high--medical, emotional, mental, you name it.

Heck, for all we know, he can't enjoy sex until you know each other better, and please--6 weeks isn't very long to judge overall behaviour on.

Bottom line: It's only been 6 weeks. Either accept that this is how it is, or move on. YOU can't change him.

One of the great things we have going is that we seem to be able to talk about anything. I haven't delved into the issue of libido because I'm trying to figure it out without touching on something that might be uncomfortable for him to talk about this early. He's a sweetheart and I want to be careful how I handle it. Thanks for the advice.

Im 22 and my boyfriend is 29 we been together for a year and five months. Ive been through and still am in the same situation. Hes the first guy I've actually enjoyed having sex w

With and now after we moved in together its worse. Our communication love and everything is well except sex. So if you can give me advice with your experiances let me know