My ex partner won't tell me anything about my child who was due on sep 11 and we have no mutual friends.im going for acsess but is going to take a while.how do I find out if she's alive or not? I'm going out of my mind not knowing and I can't go to her house as she calls the police

You can go online and scan your local paper's birth announcements for the week or two around your exe's due date.

You've left out a lot of detail. Is the baby yours biologically? Does your ex have a restraining order against you? If you're the biological father, I suggest contacting an attorney to assist you. If you're not, you might be out of luck. Only a professional can assist you. You might ask that this post be moved to family law.