I received an email from my exhusband's girlfriend requesting that I agree to reduce child support payments, and that I tell the State of Wisconsin that I want to receive payments directly from him and for the State to cease it's collection efforts on my behalf. Right now he is "supposed" to be paying support for our two children. I know he has had a change in jobs and he is not making what he used to. To that end I have no problem with the court adjusting his payments. They are offering to pay $200 a month (his court ordered amount is $175/week plus $75 toward arrears). He currently earns $15/hr. He has told me that he works 6 10-hour days, which calculates to more than $200 month. My issue is that, he doesn't pay. He is over $40,000 in arrears. He has paid very little over the last 7 years... which would explain the amount of the arrearage. In the email they state that they are "...hoping they can work out a separate deal with the state ...and not have to pay the full amount".

I do not think it is wise to accept payments directly from him... actually, I don't think I am supposed to. Nor do I think $200/month for two children is sufficient to meet the needs of my children. Can they just "cut a deal" with the State to wipe out his arrears debt? I thought it was you owe what you owe until you are current. I was under the impression Child Support Debt does not "go away." HELP! I do not know how or if I should respond to their request.

Hi, foolsplay!

For one thing, please don't communicate with these people via email. The content of email can be changed... It's in your best interest to protect yourself as much as you can.

Does the State know that he's in arrears that much?

Thanks!

The State is aware of his arrears. He lives in SC.

Hi again, foolsplay!

Have you been to court where you live to see about an order for child support happening in South Carolina? If the parent that owes child support lives in a different state than the custodial parent does, then typically, there needs to be a separate order done in the state where the non-custodial parent resides.

Thanks!

WI Workforce Development has been in contact with the State of SC and has transmitted all relevant info. I believe SC is supposed to be assisting in the collection. I don't know if there is an order there

You thought right. He owes what he owes and the state isn't going to modify that. In addition, tell the girlfriend to get bent and do not allow, even for a second, him to modify how he is paying support and to whom.

NONE of this benefits you or your child. If he feels his support should be modified, let the court decide what he should be paying. This won't change what he owes in arrears though.

You ex and his significant can not dictate what he pays for his current or arrearage.

That is set and determined by the Courts alone.

Tell them if they want their adjustments to file. Other than that it is just talk to get you to reduce their obligations. Let the Courts decide. He probably won't even file.