I've been with my partner for 4 years on and off! We split up about a year ago for eight months the longest we have ever split up and then two and a half months ago we got back together, my mum didn't agree to this so I ended up moving in with my nan and him which made my nan fall out with my mum and myself! He says I get moody for no reason and argue two much and he has decided to split up with me, its been a week and he has already been out meeting people because he says he does want to be in a relationship and that hurts so much because he has a chance to be with me!
I've gone out and got myself a job because he was paying my way and I thought to myself maybe if I get a job I won't have so much time on my hands to think and be paranoid or get moody with him, and we can do normal couple things like go out for meals and go on holiday! All his stuff his still here so I met him last night and he is seriouse its over and he wants to move on I'm gutted cause I don't think 2 n half months don't prove nothing to weather its going to work or not! I'm finding it so hard to deal with I can't cope with these feelings! I try thinking of all the bad stuff but it don't work all I think about is how much I miss cuddlin up to him in bed! And how I miss him making me laugh and just having him around to talk to! Its nice to have someone you have been with for so long because you can just be yourself and feel comftable! I can't stop crying or thinking about what he is doing it is killing me and I find it so much harder then last time! I don't know what to do? :(

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...ed-123862.html

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...kup-78597.html

Here are some great things to get started. Please let me know what you think.

We have all been where you are and right now you are in the most difficult part, but it will get better.

It is time to start loving yourself.

I guess you took him for granted, had too much time on your hands and appeared to needy. Two things which are not good to continue a relationship.

So you learned one lesson the hard way and from what you say, he means it, he is through.

Tick

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I'm finding it so hard to deal with I can't cope with these feelings!

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Believe it or not, that's what we all feel after a break up, and it's a terrible feeling, until we do learn how to cope with those feelings.

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and just having him around to talk to! Its nice to have someone you have been with for so long because you can just be yourself and feel comfortable!

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Your wrong, as once the emotions are under better control, and you learn to love yourself, you will be very comfortable and happy to be yourself, and love it.

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I can't stop crying or thinking about what he is doing it is killing me and I find it so much harder then last time! I don't know what to do? :(

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Take Justy's very good advice and read the links she gave you for some good insights and suggestions on how to cope.

Once you give him his stuff and cut him from your life, the healing can begin. Your just in shock now, but it does get better.

The others have already provided excellent advice, so I'm just going to add onto what they've already said.

You mentioned that you've been trying to focus on the negative aspects about him. I suggest that you forget him completely. Don't even think about good or bad things. Focus on doing something else. Keep your mind as occupied as possible so that you don't have to think about him.

I also want to add that you did the right thing by getting a job. Start supporting yourself and living for you. Everything will fall into place and in the meantime you can always talk to us.

Relationships are always hard to get over especially after 4 years, it's a long time, sadley we've all been there.

Lots of good advice has been given here to help and support you,should you need to post again someone will always be hear to help.

I know it doesn't seem like it right now, but you will come through this, you might even be able to look back at all the great times you had together, even eventually staying friends,I know some do and remain so for many years.

Welldone on getting your job,there will be lots of new people there, so keep yourself busy, try not to dwell on things,look forward and not back, there will be someone else for you in the future,I know that will be the last thing on your mind right now,but time is a great healer, eventually you will start to feel better.