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-   -   Help Please.. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=398291)

  • Sep 21, 2009, 05:22 AM
    MGuillen2
    Help Please..
    My GF just broke up with me a few days ago. I was controlling, jealous, I used to lose my temper a lot, insecure and was possessive at times. All this unfolded when she took another guy to her senior HS prom.. She gave me a chance before or maybe 2 to change my issues,I tried but she didn't realize some of her mistakes.. Well, my jealousy lead to a break up and She said that she didn't want to be with me anymore and she was tired of me, that she's not turning back, she's not coming back to me and its for good, she's made up her mind and knows what's best for her and she can't be with me anymore.. I've been really depressed and I have seen my friends with their GFs and it destroys me inside because I love her with all my heart, I really want to be with her, she's my everything. I don't want to lose her and I'm so sorry. I've said sorry to her but the problem is I keep doing the same damn things and I don't know why. I didn't call her or text her at all yesterday but the 2 days before I tried everything I could. Emailed her and texted her a lot, I see now that you say that's a big mistake, yes I was going crazy, I didn't know what to do, I LOVE HER. I can't be without her. I really need your help, what can I do? Please help me. I really want to call her or text her but I don't know if I should.. :'(
  • Sep 21, 2009, 05:27 AM
    redhed35

    You have pointed out some very negative traits in yourself,jealous,angry,possessive.. you need to work on these issues.

    I doubt she will come back,and you only have yourself to blame,however in saying that,now that you do know what the issues were you can work on them,and not let them be a factor in future relationships.

    Do not torment this girl by text,phone etc,it makes you needy and desperate..

    Starting no contact will benefit you in many ways.

    Read the stickies in the relationship thread and start making a change in your life today.
  • Sep 21, 2009, 05:39 AM
    amicon
    Now that you know why she broke up with you, you can start working on your issues.First you need to accept that its over and start moving on.No contact, so no more emailing texting etc.Respect her decision so that YOU can get your life back on track.
  • Sep 21, 2009, 06:23 AM
    MGuillen2

    But we love each other.. I just really want to be with her. I really don't want to let her go. We've done so many things together.. I know she cares too but she hasn't called me. She has a few of my things such as a game system and my hoodies and shirts. I was supposed to pick these up about 2 days ago but I didn't. What should I do? When I see her? I want to write her a love letter.. Do you think she'll come back to me? I don't know.. I don't know. I love her, I don't want to let her go.. What we have is so special.. I'm not a complete.. I'm really a nice guy and sweet. Loving. I never thought I would be like that.. Its just in previous relationships I've been hurt and cheated on. I was really looking out for myself too. But I just want to be with her.. Kiss her, hug her, hear her laugh again.. :'(
  • Sep 21, 2009, 06:25 AM
    kctiger

    You do what you got to do to release your emotions MG, but the fact is she has made it clear it is over and you have to be a man and accept that. Acting like a stalker or acting creepy isn't going to do anything but lower your own dignity. From the sounds of it, she doesn't sound like she will come back. The question is, what if she does come back? Are you going to start working on YOUR own problems NOW to ensure that a relationship with anyone can remain healthy in the future? That's what I would be worried about. Get your own act together and make yourself more valuable for future endeavors.
  • Sep 21, 2009, 07:20 AM
    I wish
    Most of the problems that you have is not within your relationship. It's not problems that can be fixed while you are with it. These are problems that you have to fix on your own.

    You definitely need to be single for a while so that you can work on your personality before you start another relationship.

    We have no idea if you can get her back, but she's made it clear that she doesn't want to go backwards and that she's moving on with her life. So you have to respect her decision. Forcing her to be with you is just another example of your controlling traits.

    Leave her alone and focus on working on your personality.
  • Sep 22, 2009, 05:26 AM
    thecatmando
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by amicon View Post
    Now that you know why she broke up with you, you can start working on your issues.First you need to accept that its over and start moving on.No contact, so no more emailing texting etc.Respect her decision so that YOU can get your life back on track.

    Agreed

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