I have been dating a guy for almost a year now. We have the strongest relationship ever. I enjoy just studying with him, spending time with his family, simple stuff. Those are my favorite things to do with him, the simple things. We are both Christians, we go to the same chruch, we both play in orchestra for chruch(we are both music geeks), and we love God. One night, we kind of dropped all of that of a cliff. We sort of did, you know, but I guess technically not. It hasn't happened since. Its been enough and I still feel bad about it though we have vowed that that will not happen again and it will really happen only after we get married if we do(which we both plan to marry eachother). I really need advise on what to do. How do I forgive myself? Do I stay with him after making that one mistake or is it to big to forgive? I really need help on this.

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You can forgive yourself, but as a christian you need to seek forgivness from God. This means not only asking but also changing your ways in your heart. There have been many people in the bible who have committed horrendous sins, and God has used them even after their sins have been committed. You have made the right first step by understanding what you did, but now you must follow through with a renewed spirit. God will forgive you, just live for him and not for the flesh.

I think you should ask yourself, how religious you are. It seems to me that obviously religion wasn't important enough for you to keep you away from temptation. If it was really an honest mistake and you regret it deeply, talk to God about it. I don't see a reason why you should break up with your boyfriend unless he stands in the way of you making that same mistake again.

Is there someone in your church you could have a meeting with? The three of you could discuss what steps you both could take to not let it happen again. One step I could think of is to not be alone with each other, have a habit of having someone else present with you like a little brother or another person from band.

The very fact that you are thinking negatively about this indicates that you regret it. I'm guessing the two of you will be much more aware of emotions and attraction, and will take whatever preventive steps you feel necessary if these urges bubble up again. God created us with a sex drive, so what you are experiencing is normal human biology. God has forgiven you already; now, forgive yourself.

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Originally Posted by jwood2011

I have been dating a guy for almost a year now. We have the strongest relationship ever. I enjoy just studying with him, spending time with his family, simple stuff. Those are my favorite things to do with him, the simple things. We are both Christians, we go to the same chruch, we both play in orchestra for chruch(we are both music geeks), and we love God. One night, we kinda dropped all of that of a cliff. We sorta did, u know, but I guess technically not. It hasn't happened since. Its been enough and I still feel bad about it though we have vowed that that will not happen again and it will really happen only after we get married if we do(which we both plan to marry eachother). I really need advise on what to do. How do I forgive myself? Do I stay with him after making that one mistake or is it to big to forgive? I really need help on this.

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I have a question. How do you "technically not" have sex? You don't have to answer that . Either way, it's going to be OK. "You can unscrew a lightbulb, but"... well, you can figure out the rest.

If you did, get past it. GOD forgives us doesn't HE? If HE can forgive you, then I'm sure HE would want you to forgive yourself.

Is this your only sin? No, sure it's not.

You can't go back in time and not do "it". So I suggest you two keep your commitment, and keep your love alive.

You're very lucky to have found love at this stage in your lives. Keep living your lives like the way you are, and I'm sure you two will make fine adults, parents, and most importantly, Christians.

May GOD ease your guilt, and bless your future.

Thanks to everybody. I really am a stron g christian. I spend everyday now reading my bible study, I'm always praying, and I'm always asking Him for advice