I really need some advice... especially when in this day and age mothers somehow have more rights then fathers...
My daughter just turned 1, her mother has tried everything to keep me away from her, when I get my limited visits which where it was every other Sunday for an hr and half. And if I was with my daughter any longer she would take my daughter out of my hands and tell me to leave...
She finally I guess got sick of me trying to see my daughter, I wasn't going to give up, she decided that I would be easier for her to take me to court...
Honestly I don't mind paying child support, but it bothers me when I don't have the right to see my daughter without having her mother there...
Her mother has even gone as far as trying to teach my daughter not to say "daddy"... of course on court documents she denies this...
She has used everything against me... smoking hemp occasionally, and the relationship between my parents isn't the greatest...

I honestly feel lost... I have no family that I can trust, or say that they're for me...

Any advice as to what I can do... please let me know...

PS
I can't afford a lawyer... was recently laid off... and having difficulty finding work... which is making things a bit more difficult...


Thanks...

I'm not sure I'm understanding this. Is the Sunday visits the deal unofficially worked out with you and your ex? Or court ordered?

It is obvious you don't have an attorney, you need to get set visits at your home, most likely every other weekend at the least.

You can't afford not to have an attorney

And, yes, smoking "hemp occasionally" can be used in Court against you. Anyone's personal beliefs aside this can be used in an argument that you use street drugs and are an unfit influence or a danger to your child.

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Originally Posted by justcurious55

i'm not sure i'm understanding this. is the sunday visits the deal unofficially worked out with you and your ex? or court ordered?

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No there was no court till this month... everything was based on agreement between each other...

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Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

And, yes, smoking "hemp occasionally" can be used in Court against you. Anyone's personal beliefs aside this can be used in an argument that you use street drugs and are an unfit influence or a danger to your child.

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I have had 2 major motorcycle accidents.. my spine a lot of my joints where affected by this accident... I have doctors admitting that I suffer from chronic back pain... they aren't going to say that I should be allowed to smoke hemp.. obviously... my position is that if the court orders me to stop smoking hemp... I will... but I require other forms of medicine... which I can't afford... hemp is so much cheaper and works to relax the muscles... also I work in construction and I'm the smallest guy on the site... so I have to put effort and at the end of the day my back is killing me...
But if court wants me to stop ill stop... I love my daughter... but its BS though... lol

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Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

It is obvious you don't have an attorney, you need to get set visits at your home, most likely every other weekend at the least.

You can't afford not to have an attorney

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Nope... got laid off in July... been looking for ever since... and what a convent time for my daughters mother to attack me... I don't work... I don't have a car... but I can get one anytime I need... so yea... I know where I stand in court... all because want to express their "power"... well they weren't powerful while they were laying on their backs... right?. lol

Wow. If that's how you choose to behave in court, you are screwed. I'm not laughing out loud about any of this, I'm not sure what you're finding so funny.

Your position on illegal drugs may very well make you an unfit parent. A court does not need to order you to not smoke pot... the LAW does. If a court has to, you should be in jail.

The rest of your story... not buying it. Your child's mother cannot teach your daughter not to say daddy to you. A 1 year old does not have the cognitive ability to learn that. Most can't even say daddy in the first place.

Your problem in court isn't that you are a father and the mother has all the power, your problem is that you have an attitude problem and the mother is doing things the right way.

If you can prove to the court that you are financially in dire straits,you can get your child support amended to reflect your present income and you also may qualify for a court appointed lawyer.
Many family courts have mediation services ,which are free and you should also check into that.

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Originally Posted by castertroy

I have had 2 major motorcycle accidents..my spine a lot of my joints where affected by this accident...i have doctors admitting that i suffer from chronic back pain...they arent going to say that i should be allowed to smoke hemp..obviously...my position is that if the court orders me to stop smoking hemp....i will...but i require other forms of medicine...which i can't afford...hemp is so much cheaper and works to relax the muscles...also i work in construction and im the smallest guy on the site...so i have to put effort and at the end of the day my back is killing me...
but if court wants me to stop ill stop...i love my daughter....but its BS tho....lol

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The Court shouldn't have to order you to stop smoking weed if, in fact, it is not by prescription. You are breaking the Law and attempting to explain why and that is what the Court will look at.

As far as whether you should or shouldn't smoke, that's up to opinion - I work with the Court system. What is looked at is whether you are breaking the law, not why you are doing it.

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Originally Posted by castertroy

Nope...got laid off in July...been looking for ever since....and what a convent time for my daughters mother to attack me...i don't work....i dont have a car...but i can get one anytime i need...so yea....i know where i stand in court..."I;m a father, I"m F*@$ked.....all because want to express their "power"...well they werent powerful while they were laying on their backs...right?....lol

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Your attitude (combined with the "hemp" smoking) is going to cost you custody of your daughter.

You are making a very convincing argument concerning why you are an unfit parent.

So the mother of the child got pregnant by herself? You had no part in that?

You apparently enjoy being a victim - and I guess so far it's worked for you.

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Comments on this post
JudyKayTee agrees: Agree with you in theory but if he has money for street weed he has money to pay an Attorney.

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Point well taken!

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Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

Your attitude (combined with the "hemp" smoking) is going to cost you custody of your daughter.

You are making a very convincing argument concerning why you are an unfit parent.

So the mother of the child got pregnant by herself? You had no part in that?

You apparently enjoy being a victim - and I guess so far it's worked for you.

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Sounds to me like the mother was the victim here...

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... well they weren't powerful while they were laying on their backs... right?. lol

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I think everyone else somehow missed that the courts have apparently ordered supervised visits:

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Originally Posted by castertroy

but it bothers me when i dont have the right to see my daughter without having her mother there

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Clearly, you are not a fit parent and want to blame the mother for everything. The court doesn't order supervised visits just for fun; it takes a lot to get that passed. You, sir, are the reason that your daughter "got taken away" from you.

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Originally Posted by this8384

I think everyone else somehow missed that the courts have apparently ordered supervised visits:


Clearly, you are not a fit parent and want to blame the mother for everything. The court doesn't order supervised visits just for fun; it takes a lot to get that passed. You, sir, are the reason that your daughter "got taken away" from you.

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He stated that there has been no court orders... which means no paternity has been established either. He has supervised visits because he hasn't established paternity nor taken on the responsibility of child support. The mother is just being responsible.

Not defending... just clarifying. :)

I thought this:

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Originally Posted by castertroy

she decided that i would be easier for her to take me to court...

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Originally Posted by castertroy

No there was no court till this month

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... meant that temporary orders were in place, which led to him not being able to see his child without her mother present.

Maybe I'm loopy :)

You should have gone to court as soon as the child was born to establish your rights. But you chose to go the easier way out. Now you are paying for it.

Actually the courts have swung towards father's rights in the last several years.

I also think your claim of teaching the child not to say daddy at 1 is ridiculous.

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Originally Posted by this8384

I think everyone else somehow missed that the courts have apparently ordered supervised visits:


Clearly, you are not a fit parent and want to blame the mother for everything. The court doesn't order supervised visits just for fun; it takes a lot to get that passed. You, sir, are the reason that your daughter "got taken away" from you.

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Let's start this way as to the unfit parent part... the comments I made where arrogant... I know.. im upset but that certain things where accepted by the mother about medical and attitude.. my attitude is that I am not subject to conditional thinking like the majority of society is...
I leave lies at the door and I find the truth... and it seems that when people see that other people see what their true colors are they are frightened by that... When I see peoples true colors I have no mercy when it comes to exposing their ignorance..
As for the comment that I need a lawyer... well lets put it this way... I was served first... I replied to her allegations... I wrote the statements on my own with research and literature that the court system requires lawyers to use... I had a Duty counsel look over it and asked me who wrote this?. I replied I did... he smiled and said pretty good...
As for the Hemp comments... well I don't drink and I don't smoke cigarettes...
I don't support elite Pharmacy Companies that make money off destroying our health...

When I told that my daughter was born... I asked if she put my name on the birth cert.. she replied no... I asked her what she needed for my daughter... she said she wanted nothing from me and told me to leave... I have spend hundreds of dollars on gifts for my daughter... yet in return I haven't seen any compassion with regards to letting me have my daughter for a day... so that she can get to know my grandmother... I have 4 God kids... I have taken care of kids all my life... and unfit father well I doubt I am close to being that...
And by the way the only reason hemp is illegal... is so that huge companies wouldn't lose Billions... and they discovered that in the 1940s-50s... but before that it was fine... kind of strange as to who's making these "laws"... question is are they for us... or against us...

IE... how many families lost everything cause of Divorce, child custody..?
It's a Business...

Well... im sorry I fight it out by myself... and eventually the truth will come out...

Bless...

Oh you poor thing. Not.
I almost felt sorry for you when I read your very first post. I thought you were a good guy just trying to keep the relationship with is little girl. If having your name on the birth certificate was so important to you and getting to see your little girl was so important also, you'd have gone to court already and established paternity and petitioned for visitation. Not sat there waiting and whining until you were served.

And were you high when you wrote your last post? I can't even understand parts of it.
And I know all about the history of hemp and why it's illegal, blah blah blah. Bottom line, regardless of whether it should or shouldn't be illegal, IT IS ILLEGAL! And as judy already pointed out, the court doesn't care why you are breaking the law.