Ask Me Help Desk - At age 7?

My daughter is only 7 and she is having some questionable behavior. One time my step mother walked in on her on top of her little sister and as stepmom put it "she was just humping away". When I give little sister a bath and at anytime that she is undressed my 7 year old comes up with some excuse to be in the same room. Like she'll pretend she has to use the bathroom and shell sit on the toilet but she never really goes she'll just sit there and stare at her sister so now I tell her she has to wait till Im done and lock her out. A few times Ive caught her trying to kiss her sister on the mouth or saying stuff and suggesting things that are innappropriate. She has boy barbie dolls and girl barbie dolls. The boy barbie is tossed to the side while the two female barbies get their make out session on. Ive had to go through her room and throw out a lot of clothes because no matter what she will find the tightest, show your butt when you bend over street hooker clothing that she can wear and Ive caught her trying to sneak off to school with the stuff hidden under other clothing so now I have to pick her clothing out for her. I know that she isn't getting any of this from me. Idk. Im confused. Is this normal behavior for her age?

At the age of 7, you should ALWAYS be the one picking out her clothing, no matter what she wants. She is 7, not 17. Is she getting ideas for her behavior from anywhere else? Is there any kind of outside influence about this 'behavior'?

And I have to tell you, wondering whether this behavior is normal isn't good. YOU are her mother. Start acting like it, discipline her for any inappropriate behavior AFTER you make sure none of this is or anything like this is being done to her. Talk to her, take her to a counselor, just get her to open up on why she has been doing the things that she is doing. Its important that you do, before it starts to get out of hand (and it can).

I had daughters, this is not common behavior. I would talk to a professional about it. Are you sure she has not been touched or molested by someone? A neighbor, cousin, uncle, even a friends brother. It is not uncommon to find out someone in her life has done something to her. I would be quite concerned about that.

Do you know if she was in the care of anybody else that she might be getting this from? Somebody that has done something to her? How about television influence. There are so many different possibilities of why this child is suddenly behaving this way. Mind you there are some children even young children who are curious about things. She needs to know this behaviour is not acceptable with her sister or anybody else. Counselor is a great idea. You need to be able to discipline her and teach her that this behaviour is unexceptable.

Thank you for your responses. I do discipline my kids every time they do something wrong. Ive had a very hard time with them since their father left us. There was a huge problem with them lying and stealing from me and other people and Im still having a hard time trusting them. Especially my seven year old. But Im doing my best. And to the person that says its not good that I wonder if something is normal: kids do not come with instruction lables and you don't automatically know everything as soon as you become a parent. Its something you have to learn and this behavior is new to me. As for picking her clothes out I allowed her to do it because she seemed to have no problem picking decent clothing before and no one picked my clothes for me when I was a child. There is no reason she should have this behavior. I choose what they watch on TV and who are around. The only thing I can think of is their father who I am divorced from who is not allowed around children because he put bruises on a little boys private which the court calls it aggravated assault. But my children were taken to a doctor and checked out and put through counselors and nothing was found wrong and the kids were asked if any one touched them and they said no. Ive even pulled them to the side myself and told them that its bad if anyone does this and they should tell me if anyone does and its not their fault and nothing. Ive tried being paitient and waiting because sometimes they'll tell me things out of no where but Ive gotten nothing. I can think of no reason at all for her to act this way at her age.

I understand where you are coming from, and keep on trying, much luck to you.

Quote:

Originally Posted by nymphetamine

my daughter is only 7 and she is having some questionable behavior. One time my step mother walked in on her on top of her little sister and as stepmom put it "she was just humping away". When I give little sister a bath and at anytime that she is undressed my 7 year old comes up with some excuse to be be in the same room. Like she'll pretend she has to use the bathroom and shell sit on the toilet but she never really goes she'll just sit there and stare at her sister so now I tell her she has to wait till Im done and lock her out. A few times Ive caught her trying to kiss her sister on the mouth or saying stuff and suggesting things that are innappropriate. She has boy barbie dolls and girl barbie dolls. The boy barbie is tossed to the side while the two female barbies get their make out session on. Ive had to go through her room and throw out alot of clothes because no matter what she will find the tightest, show your butt when you bend over street hooker clothing that she can wear and Ive caught her trying to sneak off to school with the stuff hidden under other clothing so now I have to pick her clothing out for her. I know that she isnt getting any of this from me. Idk. Im confused. Is this normal behavior for her age?

Some curiousity is normal. Has she seen things at the age she shouldn't be seeing. Or could she herself had something sexual happen to her. I know with the 5 year old I adopted (prior to adoption) her grandfather alledgely sexually abused her. I notice her twisting her nipples, having inappropriate boundaries. Maybe you should take her to the pediatrian and explain your concerns and they will check her and see if anything is going on. Maybe even get her in therapy, it's always better to get them help when they are young.

I agree with getting her into therapy. Even if she says nothing happened to her something may have and she just feels uncomfortable with sharing. I can relate to that because I was molested when I was 6 and even though my mom had told me over and over again that it was okay to tell her about anything, I had a hard time. It wasn't until only a couple of years ago that I told her of this

I would agree with the others "there is something not right here", I would check out who she plays with at school. It is amazing what you observe in the playground. She is acting out something.