How do you have fun with two children who are 7 and 4 that can't stand coming over every weekend because you are the only parent who gives them discipline?


Long in short I have them every weekend. They hate coming over and I am to the point of just telling them not to come over anymore.

The problem with that is then I will be stuck with more child support (sounds messed up I know). I already get kicked in the face every month with the amount I pay. Then they come over and I am expected too spend more on them?

What am I suppose to do. I am going to stand my ground with my kids because they have attitudes, lying and other such issues.

Please don't be offended but try lighting up just a bit, they are still very young, of course, need discipline but they need to sense that coming to your home is a fun thing, take them out, find out what they like to do, have some real fun with them.

That would be ideal. I agree. They are young. But they also have no discipline 5 out of the seven days of the week. So, very difficult to figure out what to do. I'm not one to play the usual divorced parent game of who can be the more fun parent.

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Originally Posted by buster1104

How do you have fun with two children who are 7 and 4 that can't stand coming over every weekend because you are the only parent who gives them discipline?


Long in short I have them every weekend. They hate coming over and I am to the point of just telling them not to come over anymore.

The problem with that is then I will be stuck with more child support (sounds messed up I know). I already get kicked in the face every month with the amount I pay. Then they come over and I am expected too spend more on them?

What am I suppose to do. I am going to stand my ground with my kids because they have attitudes, lying and other such issues.

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Kids at 7 and 4 are still really young. I don't think you should be so hard on them. Diciplining is good, but you can't be too hard on kids when they're that small. Also, if they're not getting diciplined at home, it's going to be hard for you to do it when you only see them 2 days out of the week. Try to find other ways of diciplining them, because what you're doing isn't working, it's just making you out to be the bad guy. You don't want them to look at you as the bad guy, you want them to see you as a good dad. I'm not saying let them get out of control, but just ease up a bit.

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Originally Posted by buster1104

How do you have fun with two children who are 7 and 4 that can't stand coming over every weekend because you are the only parent who gives them discipline?


Long in short I have them every weekend. They hate coming over and I am to the point of just telling them not to come over anymore.

The problem with that is then I will be stuck with more child support (sounds messed up I know). I already get kicked in the face every month with the amount I pay. Then they come over and I am expected too spend more on them?

What am I suppose to do. I am going to stand my ground with my kids because they have attitudes, lying and other such issues.

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Well I believe in being consistence with disciplane is important, but don't go overboard on them. They are young. As they get older they will appreciate you for being a good parent and setting boundaries. Just try to do the best with your kids when you have them. Give them rewards for good behavior. But don't give up on your children, and not have them come over... It's something you'll end up hating yourself for and will lose important times with them.

I agree with you and feel you should continue to stand your ground. Yes, they are young, but they still need guidance and discipline. I would let them know that these are rules in your house and these rules are here to stay. Could you even ask them (at their age level) of how would they discipline some one who was misbehaving? Might give you some insight, and also, I'd get them involved with some kind of board where they could SEE they're rewarded. It doesn't mean they get a gift, but if each time they're at your place and they're following simple rules, such as table manners, picking up their toys, clothes... I'd put a star by their name on the board and after so many stars, maybe a treat, or a trip to the zoo. A treat that they would enjoy, but also all of you would enjoy together. Could you get them involved with these decisions?

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Originally Posted by LisaSue

I agree with you and feel you should continue to stand your ground. Yes, they are young, but they still need guidance and discipline. I would let them know that these are rules in your house and these rules are here to stay. Could you even ask them (at their age level) of how would they discipline some one who was misbehaving? Might give you some insight, and also, I'd get them involved with some kind of board where they could SEE they're rewarded. It doesn't mean they get a gift, but if each time they're at your place and they're following simple rules, such as table manners, picking up their toys, clothes...I'd put a star by thier name on the board and after so many stars, maybe a treat, or a trip to the zoo. A treat that they would enjoy, but also all of you would enjoy together. Could you get them involved with these descisions?

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Check dates of previous posts. This thread is nearly 4 years old.

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Originally Posted by Gemini54

check dates of previous posts. This thread is nearly 4 years old.

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Yeah, noticed that after I sent my response. First time on this site, and didn't notice the date.
Oh well. SH