Ok well.im 12 almost 13 and sometimes I'm all happy and have good thoughts but then I get depressed and sad?I always think about the what if's.. and it ruins my life.but then I'm happy.I don't knoo who to be friends with because I always get jelous when my best friend is hangin out with other people and lke not talking to me.But then when me and hurr only hangout I lke hurr again.And I don't know what the real me is.I don't knoo what to do with my life.I don't knoo what to act like.And I'm afraid of difference.. and I always care of what people thnk of me.. ugh.Please help.and don't say mean things like yourr too confusing.I need an answer please:(and I just got my hairr died platnium blonde.and like some people were like your hair is white and you're a ghost and making fun of me.I was about to cry.haha.. im a very sensitive person..

Hi, merissam!

I know that it's tough growing up and trying to find the "real you" in the world. When someone is trying new things, there's always going to be those who question what's being done that's new. Some of them might even be jealous.

What's important, is that, if you're trying anything that can make you a better person in some way, it's okay. I'll bet that your hair looks great!

Do you play a musical instrument or sing, please?

Thanks!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Clough

Hi, merissam!

I know that it's tough growing up and trying to find the "real you" in the world. When someone is trying new things, there's always going to be those who question what's being done that's new. Some of them might even be jealous.

What's important, is that, if you're trying anything that can make you a better person in some way, it's okay. I'll bet that your hair looks great!

Do you play a musical instrument or sing, please?

Thanks!

---

Thank you.I am going to learn how to play the electric guitar.

It's tough being at such young age. You may not completely understand where I am coming from yet, but hopefully some day you will.

So here is what I am going to say to you. It's not about FINDING yourself, it's about CREATING yourself. Making yourself into the person that YOU want to be, nobody else.

If you have certain expectations of yourself, sit back and really think about what they are and why. If they serve a purpose, then keep them. Set goals for yourself and stick to them.

Think about what your values are and where your morals lie. Don't just believe something because somebody tells you that you should. Always try to form your own opinions about things. (this does not mean that you have to disagree with everyone else's opinion either) And make sure you know why you have that opinion.

To keep it simple, try to think about what you're thinking.

Most things happen like this; something happenes to someone that causes an emotional response. This is called a trigger. Most people understand the trigger and the emotion only, what they do not understand that their emotions are directly connected to what your thoughts were at the time of the trigger. Make sense?

Here, just in case

A) Trigger, Something happens
B) You have thoughts about the event
C) emotions caused directly from the thoughts they had

To make it simple, most people do not pay attention to what they think (B) after the trigger occurs.
Most often people try to change their emotions by changing the trigger, when in fact, they can usually be changed by changing your thoughts.

Thinking about your thoughts after there is something upsets you can be really helpful.

I suggest this, if something upsets you during the day, quickly write it down, and your immediate emotional reaction to it.
Later on in the day, when you have time, go back and read them and think about your thoughts when that happened.

Try it out, it can really help.

Hi again, merissam!

ohsohappy has given you a really great answer and ideas above!

If you're going to learn how to play the electric guitar, would you like some free musical training on this site? I'm not talking so much about the guitar. You really do need a teacher face-to-face for that. But, it is possible to learn some basic piano and music skills on this site that will help you with playing the guitar.

Thanks!