Should I break up with my girlfriend?
This is going to be long, so I apologize in advance.
Okay, I'm a 17 year old guy who is dating a 15 year old girl. I feel very affectionate towards her and everything. I love being around her and I can spend hours with her and it feels like minutes. We talk on the phone every day and every night. We fall asleep on the phone together all the time. I think she is beautiful, smart, funny, and caring. We talk about everything. We've both told each other "I love you" millions of times, probabaly every day. Sounds like a great realationship right?
Well, wrong. I put up with a lot of . A lot. First of all, the guys. There is a seemingly endless supply of dudes that call and text her all the time. We will be on the phone and she'll say "Oh, Eric is calling, I'll call you back, or "Oh Evan," or "Oh Jonny is txting me hold on" etc. I don't know what they are calling about but it's annoying. I had her phone once and she got a txt from a guy named Arron. The txt said "oh baby I'm so horny" ? I confront her about it and she says dont worry about it, the kid is 14 and has a girlfriend. Well then why the hell is he txting you?! Then theres Kenny, a kid that she says shes never met, who wont leave her alone. She leaves her phone at my house,he txts her, I txt back pretending to be her, and we get into an argument, and he says "if you don't leave me alone I will put those nude pics you sent me on the interent" WHAT THE HELL?! Lets not forget about Eric, who she ALWAYS hangs up on me to talk to. She says that she's just concerned about him because he is really emotional and she doesn't want him to do anything stupid. And this guys has never met me but I've heard from about 4 or 5 people that he wants to fight me? What about Abdul, some guy that she said forced her to give him a blow job in a movie theater? Or the 19 year old guy that she dated for a while who she says keeps bothering her. I could go on and on but I won't.
But the guys aren't the only problem. She's bossy and controlling. She littlerally tells me what to do when we are together. There usually isn't any asking. Its "Bryce, do this"Bryce, do this"Bryce, come with me to do that" etc. And everything has to be done perfectly, to her standard. If its not done right she gets really irritated and won't calm down. She gets really why if I don't do what she says, but if I just force myself to do whatever she wants she's fine. Its annoying as hell.
She's also unbelievebly needy. I mean I like it in a weird sort of way because I love being with her and talking to her and stuff, but there is a limit. I will be with my friends, and she'll call and say she just needs to talk to me. About nothing. And if I tell her I'm busy and I will call her back she gets all pouty, and once or twice even started crying?! She keeps me on the phone all night almost every night, and I don't usually mind it, but school is starting and I can't stay on the phone till 3 and get up at 6. It just can't happen.
And then last but not least there is sexual party of our relationship, lets just keep it short, I have to do all this stuff for her, but I pretty much never get anything in return.
So, my question again is, should I break up with her? I mean, I love her company, and she is by far the prettiest, hottest, most good-looking girlfriend I've ever had. I love her personality when she's not being y, and I think about her all the time. I honestly sometimes feel like I love her, but I don't know if its worth it. HELP!!
Should I give this letter to my girlfreind who has been driving me crazy?
I guess I am just writing this because I am better at expressing how I feel on paper rather than in words. I’ve always had a gift and a talent when it came to writing, which is why I chose to write this out and let you read it rather than having me just tell you in person.
First of all I want to let you know that every time I have told you I loved you I truly meant it. I honestly have fallen in love with you. I know it sounds stupid and immature of me to say, I mean…after all we are only teenagers. But I believe that you can experience love at any age. So just know that when I said I love you, every time I knew what I was saying, and I meant it.
Here’s the thing though. Just because I love you, doesn’t mean that I’m afraid to lose you. I’m not. I don’t want to lose you, but I’m not afraid to lose you. And recently the way that you’ve been treating me has caused me to question whether I should stay with you.
There are so many examples and situations that I could bring up as proof of how stressful being with you has become, but I really don’t feel like making a list. This letter isn’t meant to be rude; it isn’t in any way an angry letter. Rather, it is a letter outlining the feelings about you and me that I’ve been having over the past few weeks.
Firstly, you’re criticism. The way that you talk to me without even realizing it. The things that you say. It’s hard to think that you aren’t doing it on purpose. Telling me what other people say to you about us, seems like a roundabout way to make me change.
Telling me the stupid things that people say about me makes me feel like . I mean, I can think of plenty of things that people have said to me about you, but I keep them to myself because I respect you’re feelings. It’s just…the way that you talk about me, like I’m you’re property. Like I’m something you own. Telling me what to do, how to dress, how to walk, what way to wear my hair…its overwhelming. Last night on the phone you crushed me and I don’t even think you realized it. Like I said, no detailed examples, but if you can’t figure it out then there is something wrong.
Then there’s the way that you treat you’re dad. It honestly pisses me off. I don’t know much about him, but you treat him the same way you treat me. Like you’re property. When you ask him to do something, if he does it there’s no problem. But the second he challenges you, you turn into a complete and total . It’s a trend and I hate it. You do the same thing to me. It’s no wonder he gets annoyed with you and tries to avoid you. I’m considering doing the same thing and I’ve only been with you three months.
Then there are all the guys. All the guys that are constantly calling and texing you. It seems endless. Eric, Ron, Kenny, Abdul, Mark, Aaron, Connor,… on and on and on... I mean, I don’t believe that you cheated on me, I honestly don’t. And I don’t judge people by their past because I have a messy one myself, but when all the guys from you’re past can’t seem to leave you alone, there’s a problem. Believe it or not I have girls that I’ve been with before that still try and talk to me, and I tell them over and over that I’m taken and they should move on. It gets irritating when I’m with you and you get txt messages from three different guys while we are together. Or when we are on the phone and you switch over to take a call from another guy, or stop to txt some other guy. It makes me feel like you are bored with me, and if you are then we shouldn’t be together.
I know I’m not the most gorgeous thing to grace the earth, but honestly neither are you. I think you are beautiful, but you aren’t god’s gift to earth from heaven. I don’t need you to complain about how I look or dress, just like you wouldn’t like me to complain about the way you dress or how you wear you’re makeup. If you have a concern then just mention it, like the slouching thing, and I’ll work on it, but the way you do it just makes me feel like you don’t think I’m attractive. And again, if you don’t think I’m attractive then we probably shouldn’t be together.
Like I said, I’m not upset at all. This isn’t a break up letter, unless you want to break up after reading it. It’s not even a letter saying that we should take a break, or anything of the sort. It’s just my thoughts on paper. You might think of it as a wake up call though. Because I’m letting you know that I’m not going to stay with you if you keep acting the way you have been. I know I have some work to do myself, and I am trying to change, but this letter isn’t about me and what I need to work on. It’s about you. Keep the memories of us you have, because if things don’t get better soon there won't be many more. I really want us to work, I really do, but if things don’t its not going to be the end of the world. I’m not going to sit around and wait to see if you are going to change. I love you, and losing you would nearly kill me, but…truthfully I’d survive. Call me if you want to talk.
My girlfriend wants a break.
Okay, so I've posted here before asking if I should break up with my girlfriend. Most of you all said yes. But I decided that I couldn't do it and I would tough it out and it would get better. I thought that my girlfriend would go ballistic if I broke up with her.
But now she's saying that SHE wants a break! I couldn't believe it. Here's the thing though, I don't want to take one. I mean, for a while I considered breaking up with her, but now that she wants to take a break, I'm down and out about it. She says that she just needs some time and when we get back together that our relationship will have its spark back and if it doesn't then it wasn't meant to be.
I told her that I would do whatever it took to make us work, and that I didn't want to take a break, I just wanted her to give me a chance to prove it could go back to the way it was without a break. And she said that only thing that I needed to do to make us work, was to be there for her when when we get back together. That's it.
She said that she is with 100% certainty going to get back with me, she just needs some time away. I just need some advice. I want to call her like... every second of the day, but I force myself not to. I've called her once since our break (about three days ago) and we talked for about 2 minutes.
I just don't want to be strung along, and/or feel this crappy until we get back together. Help!!