I am trying to find advice in removing my sons sperm donors parental rights. My husband is the only father my sons knows. The "sperm donor" has been gone for 6 years and then all of a sudden reappears and wants to see my son. My son will be 8 next month so we asked him what he wanted and he said NO. I told the "sperm donor" and he was not happy. This guy has been in and out of jail for different things. He currently owes almost $30,000 in back child support through the DA. He said he would sign over his rights if the $30,000 is removed. Where do I start? I have 3 kids and can't afford to retain a lawyer for help. But it seems easy enough to fill out the legal papers since he won't be fighting it. Where can I get the legal papers from in Los Angeles County in CA?

Go to a local branch of Family Court. But relinquishing his parental rights does not legally absolve him of financial responsibility. If there is a court ordered child support then the court has to agree to forgive it. You can't on your own. I would look for a legal aid lawyer on this.

I have gone to legal aid. I make too much money to get help and not enough money to hire a lawyer. Can anyone direct me to where to get the forms?

I am asking for any help I can get from someone who can help me not make things worse. I am not asking for someone I don't know to tell me I am not doing the right thing. Advice would help!! Badgering is uneeded.

BTW why would a HEALTH ADVICE person be looking at a parental rights questions? AND has everyone else seen ECCONS comments he is a jerk to almost everyone on here. He says himself he is a bored OLD man.

You aren't listening to what you are being told. You can't modify the support agreement at least not without appearing before a judge. Child support is not for you its for the child. You are talking about potentially depriving your child. If you can't afford an atty, how are you going to afford college?

Check with the office of the court clerk. Your husband can petition to adopt your son. However, I doubt that that'll get the "sperm donor" off the hook for the $30,000 he owes in back child support (he must not have paid a cent since your son was born.) He just won't have to make any future payments.

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Originally Posted by kloane

I am asking for any help I can get from someone who can help me not make things worse. I am not asking for someone I don't know to tell me I am not doing the right thing. Advice would help!!!! Badgering is uneeded.

BTW why would a HEALTH ADVICE person be looking at a parental rights questions?? AND has everyone else seen ECCONS comments he is a jerk to almost everyone on here. He says himself he is a bored OLD man.

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HEALTH ADVICE (actually health expert) helps because I deal in mental health also, just cause you see the word HEALTH does not mean it is limited to a physical illness. Talk about badgering!!

Kloan, you are realtively new, we are all here to give advice, whether it is learned from a book or experience, but you must provide as much info as possible to get the best advice that you need.

The badgering you have done so far will only get you little advice if any.

A word to the wise for Kloane: Disparaging those who's advice or view you disagree with, especially after you asked the question, is generally considered against the rules and is bad manners here. Its fine not to take the advice, and if you think someone is out of line, use the "Report Inappropriate Post" link to complain. Its all laid out in the rules, Kloane.

You came here looking for help from people with greater knowledge and experience then you have. Its not a good idea to insult the people who are trying to help. Some people's style is more ascerbic then others. Some people might be an expert in some areas but knowledgeable in others.

Once you post you are opening yourself to any comments based on what you say. If you don't like someone's advice you are not required to follow it.

FYI ~ The Legal advice I have received for a CA lawyer states that the moment he lets go of his parental rights the DA will remove all obligations past & future of child support.

To answer the question above please don't question how I pay for my kids. I am married with 3 gorgeous kids and I have been paying for my oldest on my own with my husband I just don't think I should throw another dime my exes way to help him with anything. I already had myself $20,000 in with an attorney to obtain full custody physically & legally and I paid for that with no problem.

My main question is HE WANTS TO SIGN OVER HIS RIGHTS. I know there are forms for it because the court told there was. Does anyone have any idea where they are??

Kloane,

There is a saying about "vinegar and honey" maybe you should research that, then come back and apologize for your very rude behavior on these post. Nobody owes you any response. All these are voluntary. If you have read any of the post on many of the subjects that are available here, you would realize you are being very bad mannered to many of the main "answers" on these sites. These people are trying to be helpful and having a spitfull response to the answers doesn't get you any brownie points. I would be surprised if anybody bothered to send another response to your questions. You are just a nameless, faceless entity on the screen. Just a bunch of words thrown together. Like a book, you are telling a story and your story right at the moment is quite rude. Rudeness begets rudeness. Ace