Help!! My teen daughter is driving me nutts! I don't know where to start, we have always been close she has a great boyfriend who thinks she is a goddest, buys her whatever she wonts, takes her wherever she wonts. They get along fine on the weekend and while school is out, but if she is in school she is different, she is this way with me also.she talks to some guy from her school on line but says they are just friends, I don't believe her,her and her boyfriend have always got along great but lately she has been weird toward him.about a month a go she thought about breaking up with him after being together for a year and a half, she told him she didn't feel the same about him, he took it hard,then she told him she didn't won't to break up they just need a break so she could figure out what she wonted(a boy at school ask her out). He told her OK he would wait on her and give her time, for her to call when she made her mind up. She came home from school and called him the first day to say she was sorry and she loved him, well things were fine and she did this to him again and again he stood by her and waited for her dicision. And again after one day she was calling him to say sorry and she loved him.things were back to normal and it seems in the last few days she has been acting funny again, he goes to a different school and works part time after school some, so she hasn't seen him in a couple of days,her boyfriend is close to our family he goes on vacation with us and everything, I know that they have had sex, my daughter use to tell me everything ,it was the first time for both of them.so what is up with her!she couldn't ask for a better boyfriend and she will tell you so, some days she is telling him he is her world and she loves him and others she barley talks to him. She has started to lie to me to which she never did. I think it is this boy at her school but she says it isn't and that I'm up in her grill!help please all we are doing is fighting now she says I think she is cheating , and I do

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Originally Posted by brendae73

Help!!!!My teen daughter is driveing me nutts! I dont know where to start, we have always been close she has a great boyfriend who thinks she is a goddest, buys her whatever she wonts, takes her wherever she wonts. they get along fine on the weekend and while school is out, but if she is in school she is different, she is this way with me also.she talks to some guy from her school on line but says they are just friends, i dont believe her,her and her boyfriend have always got along great but lately she has been weird toward him.about a month a go she thought about breaking up with him after being together for a year and a half, she told him she didnt feel the same about him, he took it hard,then she told him she didnt wont to break up they just need a break so she could figure out what she wonted(a boy at school ask her out). he told her ok he would wait on her and give her time, for her to call when she made her mind up. she came home from school and called him the first day to say she was sorry and she loved him, well things were fine and she did this to him again and again he stood by her and waited for her dicision. and again after one day she was calling him to say sorry and she loved him.things were back to normal and it seems in the last few days she has been acting funny again, he goes to a different school and works part time after school some, so she hasnt seen him in a couple of days,her boyfriend is close to our family he goes on vacation with us and everything, i know that they have had sex, my daughter use to tell me everything ,it was the first time for both of them.so what is up with her!she couldnt ask for a better boyfriend and she will tell you so, some days she is telling him he is her world and she loves him and others she barley talks to him. she has started to lie to me to which she never did. i think it is this boy at her school but she says it isnt and that im up in her grill!help please all we are doing is fighting now she says i think she is cheating , and i do

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You should let her live her life and stay out of it

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Originally Posted by brendae73

Help!!!!My teen daughter is driveing me nutts! I dont know where to start, we have always been close she has a great boyfriend who thinks she is a goddest, buys her whatever she wonts, takes her wherever she wonts. they get along fine on the weekend and while school is out, but if she is in school she is different, she is this way with me also.she talks to some guy from her school on line but says they are just friends, i dont believe her,her and her boyfriend have always got along great but lately she has been weird toward him.about a month a go she thought about breaking up with him after being together for a year and a half, she told him she didnt feel the same about him, he took it hard,then she told him she didnt wont to break up they just need a break so she could figure out what she wonted(a boy at school ask her out). he told her ok he would wait on her and give her time, for her to call when she made her mind up. she came home from school and called him the first day to say she was sorry and she loved him, well things were fine and she did this to him again and again he stood by her and waited for her dicision. and again after one day she was calling him to say sorry and she loved him.things were back to normal and it seems in the last few days she has been acting funny again, he goes to a different school and works part time after school some, so she hasnt seen him in a couple of days,her boyfriend is close to our family he goes on vacation with us and everything, i know that they have had sex, my daughter use to tell me everything ,it was the first time for both of them.so what is up with her!she couldnt ask for a better boyfriend and she will tell you so, some days she is telling him he is her world and she loves him and others she barley talks to him. she has started to lie to me to which she never did. i think it is this boy at her school but she says it isnt and that im up in her grill!help please all we are doing is fighting now she says i think she is cheating , and i do

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Bless her and know that all you have done in bringing her up properly will facilitate her making the right choices for her highest good.
Get out of the story and let her make her own choices

It's very nice of you to look out so closely for her boyfriend, who isn't even related to you. It almost seems like you're more concerned for her boyfriend's happiness than you are for hers. Have you tried talking to her in an objective, matter-of-fact manner, kind of the way you'd talk to a girlfriend who you felt was unjustly jerking a boyfriend around? That might be your best approach in this situation. Temporarily remove your mother's hat and replace it with the hat of an experienced woman and talk to her truly as woman-to-woman. Ultimately she'll have to make up her own mind. Keep in mind that if her boyfriend tolerates this then he's partly to blame as well. He needs to grow a spine and stand up to your daughter (but I'm not sure you should stick your nose in that one!)

Who let the dogs out! Look here
Go look at all her threads... jigs up!

Give her space and time the way her boyfriend has, and let her learn from any mistakes she might make.

I think it would be best suited if you stayed back and let your daughter live her life, she can't expect to just be able to have you make her deciscions for her, and if she screws up it will be a lesson in life she will learn that really no one can teach her. You can be there for her when she falls but you need to let her fly by herself. It's her life to screw up, not yours.

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Originally Posted by brendae73

Help!!!!My teen daughter is driveing me nutts! I dont know where to start, we have always been close she has a great boyfriend who thinks she is a goddest, buys her whatever she wonts, takes her wherever she wonts. they get along fine on the weekend and while school is out, but if she is in school she is different, she is this way with me also.she talks to some guy from her school on line but says they are just friends, i dont believe her,her and her boyfriend have always got along great but lately she has been weird toward him.about a month a go she thought about breaking up with him after being together for a year and a half, she told him she didnt feel the same about him, he took it hard,then she told him she didnt wont to break up they just need a break so she could figure out what she wonted(a boy at school ask her out). he told her ok he would wait on her and give her time, for her to call when she made her mind up. she came home from school and called him the first day to say she was sorry and she loved him, well things were fine and she did this to him again and again he stood by her and waited for her dicision. and again after one day she was calling him to say sorry and she loved him.things were back to normal and it seems in the last few days she has been acting funny again, he goes to a different school and works part time after school some, so she hasnt seen him in a couple of days,her boyfriend is close to our family he goes on vacation with us and everything, i know that they have had sex, my daughter use to tell me everything ,it was the first time for both of them.so what is up with her!she couldnt ask for a better boyfriend and she will tell you so, some days she is telling him he is her world and she loves him and others she barley talks to him. she has started to lie to me to which she never did. i think it is this boy at her school but she says it isnt and that im up in her grill!help please all we are doing is fighting now she says i think she is cheating , and i do

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It sounds like hormones running wild

It's a known fact that some teens girls are prone to being finicky, fickle, picky, unknowing and naïve. If she loses a great guy? Let her learn that lesson on her own, and just be there for her if she is hurt, you are mom, its what you are there for. You have a teen on your hands honey, you can never really direct but you can sure as hell guide.

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Originally Posted by valinors_sorrow

Who let the dogs out! Look here
Go look at all her threads..............jigs up!

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Whoa. O_O

I think that you being conserd is awsome! But give her alittle space don't ignore her and if she starts getting out of hand and being rude. Take the cellphone away if it continues ground her.

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Originally Posted by brendae73

Help!!!!My teen daughter is driveing me nutts! I dont know where to start, we have always been close she has a great boyfriend who thinks she is a goddest, buys her whatever she wonts, takes her wherever she wonts. they get along fine on the weekend and while school is out, but if she is in school she is different, she is this way with me also.she talks to some guy from her school on line but says they are just friends, i dont believe her,her and her boyfriend have always got along great but lately she has been weird toward him.about a month a go she thought about breaking up with him after being together for a year and a half, she told him she didnt feel the same about him, he took it hard,then she told him she didnt wont to break up they just need a break so she could figure out what she wonted(a boy at school ask her out). he told her ok he would wait on her and give her time, for her to call when she made her mind up. she came home from school and called him the first day to say she was sorry and she loved him, well things were fine and she did this to him again and again he stood by her and waited for her dicision. and again after one day she was calling him to say sorry and she loved him.things were back to normal and it seems in the last few days she has been acting funny again, he goes to a different school and works part time after school some, so she hasnt seen him in a couple of days,her boyfriend is close to our family he goes on vacation with us and everything, i know that they have had sex, my daughter use to tell me everything ,it was the first time for both of them.so what is up with her!she couldnt ask for a better boyfriend and she will tell you so, some days she is telling him he is her world and she loves him and others she barley talks to him. she has started to lie to me to which she never did. i think it is this boy at her school but she says it isnt and that im up in her grill!help please all we are doing is fighting now she says i think she is cheating , and i do

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First off even though your family loves this 1st boyfriend, you can't keep pushing the issue, it's her decision to go out with other guys, and find out what's up. I would think you'd want her to date others to see what's out there, instead of just settling for the first. Maybe you are getting too much into her personal life and should back up just a little. Her lying to you kind of means she doesn't want you to know something, she's tro work out, I believe. When she asks for advice, of course give it, be there for her like you've done, but I think you should give her a little space, right now If she's cheating, that also is her business, teens go through this and it all works out, give her a minute, she'll be fine, you raised her right, right, so let it unravel on it's own.:p

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Originally Posted by brendae73

Help!!!!My teen daughter is driveing me nutts! I dont know where to start, we have always been close she has a great boyfriend who thinks she is a goddest, buys her whatever she wonts, takes her wherever she wonts. they get along fine on the weekend and while school is out, but if she is in school she is different, she is this way with me also.she talks to some guy from her school on line but says they are just friends, i dont believe her,her and her boyfriend have always got along great but lately she has been weird toward him.about a month a go she thought about breaking up with him after being together for a year and a half, she told him she didnt feel the same about him, he took it hard,then she told him she didnt wont to break up they just need a break so she could figure out what she wonted(a boy at school ask her out). he told her ok he would wait on her and give her time, for her to call when she made her mind up. she came home from school and called him the first day to say she was sorry and she loved him, well things were fine and she did this to him again and again he stood by her and waited for her dicision. and again after one day she was calling him to say sorry and she loved him.things were back to normal and it seems in the last few days she has been acting funny again, he goes to a different school and works part time after school some, so she hasnt seen him in a couple of days,her boyfriend is close to our family he goes on vacation with us and everything, i know that they have had sex, my daughter use to tell me everything ,it was the first time for both of them.so what is up with her!she couldnt ask for a better boyfriend and she will tell you so, some days she is telling him he is her world and she loves him and others she barley talks to him. she has started to lie to me to which she never did. i think it is this boy at her school but she says it isnt and that im up in her grill!help please all we are doing is fighting now she says i think she is cheating , and i do

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Maybe your daughter doesn't know what she wants and if she doesn't see how great her boyfriend is then maybe she shouldn't have a guy at all.maybe she wants 2 guys.she should just wait until she an adult and just work on getting her life together and she need to focus on knowing what she wants to be when she's an adult then she can follow her gaols in life then latter on when her life is together then she can think about having a boyfriend ,and settling down to have a family.right now she should not even be thinking of guys and dating.thinking about guys and dating is just too much for her she has homework and school and after school clubs and stuff like that she can do in stead of guys.and for the guy maybe if he hasn't talk to her about how he's treating him then maybe he should talk to her and he can just try to work things out with her.I really hope the best for your daughter and the boyfriend thing and I hope you stop having arguments with her.

I don’t think you should step back and let her go wild. I’m also not saying to ground her in her room. I’m saying you should try to talk to her not as a controlling mother but as a caring friend. Try to have a mother/daughter night out, just the two of you. Casually bring up the subject on how she's doing in school. It seems to me you two have had a strong relationship as mother and daughter and as friends, so there is no problem in asking her what’s going on. Try to see her point of view, let her know you are interested. That you miss being her friend (which it seems like you do). Nothing is better or more beautiful than the relationship between mother and daughter... I have that with my mom. And if something was causing me to do such unexplainable things I would want my mom to be there for me, ask me, take me out, have a nice dinner together, show me she cares so I would be able to tell her everything if the days drifted us apart a bit. Don’t act like a police man inspecting a crime. Act like an experienced friend who misses the time you two spent together and the honesty you both had.
That is what I think. You might come to know things you never expected.
Best of Luck,
Silent Breeze

Im a teen myself. I think you should let her learn her own lessons.. I mean don't be mad at her if she doesn't like the guy you want her to. Just let her live. If she messes up it was a mistake and she messed up but obviously she doesn't feel like she wants to talk to you about the situation or else you wouldn't be on here writing about how she drives you nuts.. thats her personal business and it shouldn't effect you just because her and her boyfriend are having problems. She's your daughter, he's not your son. Put her first and her feelings. Let her live.