Ask Me Help Desk - Should I hold my child back

My daughter is almost 8 years old and her private school teacher and principal want to put her back in 1st grade. She struggles with reading but spells well. One day she can read the words and the next she can't. She is very outgoing and has no behavior issues. She is very mature verbally, but doesn't seem to be interrested in doing homework at all. She was in public school where since she was well behaved I believe that she wasn't challenged about her reading level. We work at home on it and she claims she "can't read" but she reads restaurant menus and signs well, but won't try and read books. When tested she clams up and does poorly, but gets great scores on spelling tests. If she is reading while not being tested can read fairly well but as soon as the idea of a test pops up she can't read the material that she previously read. I don't know if I should take their advice and hold her back because I don't know how that will affect her emotionally. The teachers can't understand why she can read one day and not the next. I am going to take her to get evaluated by a Dr. and see if there are any other issues. How should I proceed?

See what the doctor says first and don't settle. Some doctors know how to rule out almost everything through the process of elimination of course. Some will even admit when they are at a loss and will send their patient to another doctor. It is very possible that she may see different types of doctors.

There could be a slew of reasons as to why your daughter can read one day but not the next. Sometimes a food allergy or sensitivity can be difficult to detect. This alone can cause someone to have difficulties with which you are describing but it is only an example. It is sometimes easy for a doctor to misdiagnose and this is why I say don't settle.

Unless you are absolutely certain and comfortable with what the doctor tells you, get a second opinion.

If it comes down to her having to be held back you can always get counseling for her if you are concerned about how it will affect her. Are there counselors at this private school?

There are no counselors in her school, and they seem like holding child back is completely normal. I just don't feel that this is normal, they talked about many kids being held back for behavior issues and she doesn't have any. They said that their school is 1 1/2 year ahead of public school so I don't know if this school now was even a good idea at all. Our public schools have almost 35 kids in a classroom and they put her in resource last year and with the one on one help she cought up quickly. So I thought by putting her in private school with 15 kids in a class that would help with the one on one help. I didn't know until today that they feel they are 1 1/2 years ahead of the state curriculum. I was more leaning on the smaller class sizes for her needs. I just got the feeling that her teacher was torn on this decision and the principal claimed that both of her kids were held back which seems strange to me. My daughter is very artistic and left handed. I have read that leftys write numbers and letters backwards up until 5th grade normally. She solved all of her math problems correctly but wrote 3 and 7 backwards occasionally. I just feel that since she got the answer correct it is more of a handwriting issue than a math issue.

Have you ever considered home schooling?

I can't do home schooling, I have a very demanding career that is the income of our family

Many children come out on top of the world when they do a grade over.
To go back two grades is worrisome to me.

If she needed help in first grade ,why wasn't she getting it?

I think I would have a discussion with the board and want an answer to that question.

If you think she is intellectually ready to go forward but she has limitations,she should have help within the curriculum to address those issues.

She should be out of the classroom for special help as she needs it,preferably once a day for each subject she is not faring well in.

Perhaps you should ask to sit in on a day in the classroom and see if she is ready to progress.

You have to look at this from all sides and make an informed decision.Talk to teachers,talk to anyone who is familiar with this type of going back two grades.I have never heard of such a policy in New York.

Personally I would encourage perhaps keeping her in the grade she is in one more year ,to back track 2 years is something I don't get.

I am a retired teacher so I know a few things and I don't understand that.

If she needs and deserves special treatment because of a learning disability,what assurance do you have that she is going to get it now?
Clearly it was not provided.We all pay for children to get that special help!
Make sure she gets it.Its her right!

I am a teacher and my opinion would be to hold her back. It's obvious that her foundation in reading isn't solid enough to continue successfully into the next grade. Sounds like she is not a fluent reader and needs extra practice in this area. Spelling is a totally different ballgame than reading; just because she spells good doesn't mean she reads good. If you do decide to send her into the next grade, or not, one thing you can do is something called the NIM approach. This is where you sit her in your lap and you read as closly in her ear as possible and point to each word. Start with something below or at her reading level and gradually build up and begin to let her point to the words with you. It sounds VERY simple but it works wonders!
Here is a website on the Neurological Impress Methoad ask NIM :)
ReadStrong - Neurological Impress Method

Let me know if you need anything else and I would be happy to help. Good luck

Normally, this would be an easy question to answer, but the fact that this is a private school complicates things. Public schools have state guidelines that they need to follow regarding struggling students and special education needs. Since private schools do not receive state funding, they can make up the rules as they go.

I am a third grade teacher and based on the information provided I would not recommend retention. Especially since she is verbally mature, putting a third grader in a first grade classroom will stunt her social growth. Even though she struggles in reading, her verbal and reasoning skills will be far beyond that of a first grader. What your daughter needs is some sort of remedial reading support in a small group setting (e.g. 1 teacher and 3-4 students in a group).

Quote:

Originally Posted by HeathP

She struggles with reading but spells well.

Spelling is encoding and reading is decoding. Sounding out words to spell will not affect the comprehension of the word she's trying to spell. However, have to sound out too many words in a reading passage can easily limit the comprehension of that passage.

Quote:

Originally Posted by HeathP

She is very mature verbally, but doesn't seem to be interrested in doing homework at all.

Often times the students who struggle in school don't like doing homework. Let's face it, if you didn't like cooking, you wouldn't look forward to dinner time. Then again, a student's lack of interest in homework may have nothing to do with academics. Kids work pretty hard in school and when they get home, the last thing they want to do is continue working hard. Not to mention Nintendo, Playstation, and the TV are tough to compete with.

Quote:

Originally Posted by HeathP

but she reads restaurant menus and signs well, but won't try and read books.

Reading signs and menus is a different kind of reading. Generally speaking, when you look at a road sign or restaurant menu, the rules of grammar do not apply. If there is a complete sentence it is not difficult to comprehend because there is so little writing.

Quote:

Originally Posted by HeathP

The teachers can't understand why she can read one day and not the next. I am going to take her to get evaluated by a Dr. and see if there are any other issues.

Going to the doctor is the smart move. Explain your concerns to the doctor and ask the doctor if there is anything medically that could be interfering with your daughter's educational growth. Although a classroom teacher teaches reading skills, we are not reading experts. There is normally a specific reading teacher in a school. This personal will have additional training in regards to the administration of different reading assessments. These assessments are able to pinpoint specific areas of weakness that need to be focused on.

If your private school really is a year and a half ahead of your state's curriculum, that's a good thing. However, the brain develops at a certain rate and this rate is slightly different for everyone. If I started teaching my students skills that were a year and a half above grade level, half of them would need additional support.