My son's father and I were never married. The father wanted him to have his last name - but I wanted him to have mine in case we never got married. The lady who handles the birth certificates at the hospital said we should put both last names, and then later on you can drop one name by not using it. So, my son's name is First Middle MyLast HisLast. I have primary custody of my son and I only want to use my name when he goes to school so that there is no confusion and no need to explain when he gets older. My son's father and his family think this is wrong and he should use their last name. Do I have to use both names?

You can use any name you wish so long as you are not trying to commit a fraud. Some schools will require official records to include both, however. If he refers to himself just by one though, it will pick up fast enough and pretty much everyone will forget the hyphen.

There is no hyphen- he just has two last names, mine first and his father's second

Should still be the same resolution.

You can still hyphenate both names ,using your surname as the last name.
That is traditionally how it is done in Spain where the hyphenated name is more popular.
My sons father is a native Spaniard so his last name is different from my sons.
Example.
Fathers name Manuel Corian- LaRouche.
Corian his fathers name LaRouche his mothers.
When you go to the next generation,as my son, the maternal grandmothers name is dropped.
Example for my son:
Michael Corian- Vaught (my family surname)
I hope I have made myself clear :)

I would assume for school purposes, you may need to present a birth certificate so you would need to use whatever name is reflected on the BC.

Changing the order of the last name is a simple process that can be done for a minimal fee.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by cll528

there is no hyphen- he just has two last names, mine first and his father's second

---

In NY you can't have two last names - you have one last name. If it's the mother's last name and the father's last name without a hyphen, the mother's last name is another "middle" name.

I also hyphenate my last name and by Law I HAVE to use a hyphen or else only the last word in the name is the last name and before that is first and middle.