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-   -   Funeral expense/procedure (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=388606)

  • Aug 19, 2009, 04:05 PM
    N0help4u
    Funeral expense/procedure
    My neighbor died Tues. morning. The family and the three sons (all in their 40's) were always wasteful with money. They still owe for their mothers funeral and haven't been making payments. Now his body is at the same funeral palor. They are saying they won't have a funeral for him unless they are paid up. He is to be cremated.

    I wanted to know what kind of deals they could make with the funeral parlor to at least get his ashes and possibly a short funeral. They have their parents house which is probably not worth even $20, that they are willing to offer for them to put a lien on if that's what it takes.

    What happens if they can't get his ashes back?
    Can they at some future date get his ashes?
  • Aug 19, 2009, 10:30 PM
    robertva

    Even if the building is worthless, there's usually some value in the land it sits on, proving there isn't a mortgage balance that is so large that it leaves the departed's estate with no equity. Whatever court handles probate matters might not allow the sons to benefit from any inheritance until the funeral expenses, taxes and the parents' other debts are paid from the estate's assets. A court appointed auditor might be empowered to make sure things are handled properly (there will probably be fees). There may be a state/city funded minimalist burial or cremation if the estate is truly bankrupt. If the sons cosigned the loan/payment agreement for the mother's burial they might be vulnerable to a civil judgment that could deplete their assets.
  • Aug 20, 2009, 05:22 PM
    N0help4u

    They only owe some back taxes and I am sure they would still get something out of the place. I'm wondering if the funeral director would go for it or not and if not could they get his ashes someday and from where?

    I don't think the sons signed anything. They don't own anything and they really don't have any real income or anything.
  • Aug 20, 2009, 06:29 PM
    J_9
    Do they belong to a church? My father's cremation and funeral was free. Was he in the armed forces? The burial was in the local national cemetery.. again free.
  • Aug 20, 2009, 06:32 PM
    N0help4u

    There is a community church up the street. The lady has given them so much money already on other things through the years.
    I think she would have already offered if she could,

    I forget if he was in the military I don't think he was. I'll ask
  • Aug 20, 2009, 06:36 PM
    J_9
    My mother's church referred her to a funeral home who works with the poor in indigent. The only monies paid was $65 for my husband and I to have my father's military flag framed. They could check with the local catholic charities, or the catholic churches in the area. I know your area is chocked full with catholic churches (I grew up there). LOL
  • Aug 20, 2009, 06:41 PM
    N0help4u

    Okay thanks
    I hope they figure something out before the funeral home goes and cremates him

    I always said the day he dies is the day Mooncrest officially dies because he was like the dad of the place. His wife already died a couple years ago. They had big picnics all summer and everybody and their brother came out of the woodwork. Then the food and beer ran out and then only their real friends were left.
  • Aug 20, 2009, 06:47 PM
    J_9
    Have them contact the Catholic Charities in the area. They may be able to hook them up with low cost or free services.
  • Aug 20, 2009, 06:48 PM
    N0help4u

    Yeah I'll tell them that. There is a Catholic Charities in downtown Pittsburgh.
  • Aug 20, 2009, 07:05 PM
    J_9
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by N0help4u View Post
    yeah I'll tell them that. There is a Catholic Charities in downtown Pittsburgh.

    Yup, and a St. Vincent DePaul Society. My family always gave money to St. Vincent in Pgh.
  • Aug 20, 2009, 07:06 PM
    N0help4u

    There is a St Vincent DePaul second hand store at the bottom of my hill.
  • Aug 20, 2009, 07:07 PM
    J_9
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by N0help4u View Post
    There is a St Vincent DePaul second hand store at the bottom of my hill.

    Try that, at least ask for info. My family gave to the one in Squirrel Hill.
  • Aug 21, 2009, 08:07 PM
    N0help4u

    I didn't know there was one in Sq. Hill.

    They said they worked something out and they can have a funeral on Sunday afternoon.'
    I guess they will get his ashes too. I didn't get to really talk to Arm cause he had to go to his gf's relatives funeral in Bedford today.
  • Aug 22, 2009, 07:05 AM
    N0help4u

    Now the one son is in the hospital because the girl down the street thought he OD-ed and they committed him for 72 hr observation so he is going to miss the funeral. His girlfriend has been in the hospital for the past month then dumped him then his dad died. G has always been a mess but this has to be a lot on him.
  • Aug 23, 2009, 05:41 AM
    J_9
    I am so sorry he is going through this. They won't let him out for the funeral? That's a little cruel.
  • Aug 23, 2009, 05:46 AM
    N0help4u

    They did let him out last night. I didn't get back to post again. Then I had to work until 1 am, Where I live the rumors are crazy but I thought his own brother would have it right.

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