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-   -   Why do I feel so horrible? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=387563)

  • Aug 16, 2009, 08:10 PM
    none12345
    Why do I feel so horrible?
    Hello guys, today I decided to actually accepted an invitation to dinner with a some people. I drove my friend there, showed up and for the whole dinner I said nothing more than a few words. Most of the people were friends of my friends. When I was there I just sat there quietly and after dinner everyone just left me alone there. Im not even sure if these people are my friends anymore or if they are just using me.

    Anyway there's this girl, I think she really likes me. She's been looking at me for a long time but I didn't say anything to her so after the dinner she got really mad and started being mean to me out of the no where. Im not sure what the problem is. Plus this girl, I have met her before like a year ago and the same thing happened. I didn't talk to her and she got mean at me again. After the first time, I asked my friend to find out what was wrong and she told me she likes me but I ignore her and don't even say hello. Now it has happened all over again tonight, I think.

    Anyway some people tried to talk to me and I responded, didn't make any friends. Plus after breaking up with my ex, I haven't been really social and tonight everything just felt weird around people. I think I'm not ready to be around people or ill ever be. Anyway that's about it. What do you guys think is the deal with this girl? Why do I feel so betrayed and feel like my friends aren't really my friends? Am I being paranoid? Why do I feel so horrible? What do you guys think?
  • Aug 16, 2009, 08:22 PM
    N0help4u

    Well if that girl reacts by throwing a fit she is either immature, a drama queen or emotionally unstable.
    When you see her again maybe point out to her that she could have just as easily gotten your attention and began a conversation with you and you did not know that she wanted to talk to you.

    I know a lot of people that I consider my friends but they really leave me feeling like the wall flower too but I don't think they are using me at least not intentionally.

    Hang in there and if you feel used just say no.
  • Aug 16, 2009, 08:34 PM
    Jake2008
    I think that maybe you should have made more of an effort.

    It doesn't take much to say a few hello's, and join in a conversation. That's what parties are all about.

    While you sit like a bump on a log, and make it clear obviously that you do not wish to communicate, people will leave you alone.

    Thios is the second time you say that the same thing has happened, and you eventually learn that they were angry because you ignored them, and dindn't even say hello.

    Why so down in the dumps. If you want to enjoy yourself, and be invited back to more parties, try being a little more sociable. And if there is a girl there that you know is interested in you, and I presume you are interested in her, make an effort!

    I see no reason from what you've said to think that your friends have turned on you. Maybe they just tried to get you out of a funky mood, and thought you might enjoy a nice evening out.
  • Aug 16, 2009, 08:43 PM
    none12345
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Jake2008 View Post
    I think that maybe you should have made more of an effort.

    It doesn't take much to say a few hello's, and join in a conversation. That's what parties are all about.

    While you sit like a bump on a log, and make it clear obviously that you do not wish to communicate, people will leave you alone.

    Thios is the second time you say that the same thing has happened, and you eventually learn that they were angry because you ignored them, and dindn't even say hello.

    Why so down in the dumps. If you want to enjoy yourself, and be invited back to more parties, try being a little more sociable. And if there is a girl there that you know is interested in you, and I presume you are interested in her, make an effort!!

    I see no reason from what you've said to think that your friends have turned on you. Maybe they just tried to get you out of a funky mood, and thought you might enjoy a nice evening out.
    Yah I think you're right. I think she is interested in me but I'm not completely sure and I'm kind of interested in her that's why I shy away from talking to her. I've never exactly been the most sociable person. Actually just yesterday it was just 2 of my closest friends hanging out, I felt like I could be myself but today the crowd was just too big and I felt nervous. I guess I don't like hanging out in big groups.

    I should have talked to her because yesterday she was talking to my friend online here at my place. My friend told her he was crashing here for the night and she told him to say hi to me for her. I don't know if that indicates she might be interested in me. But yah anyway so yah after dinner I went to the washroom, I forgot my dress shirt but my friend had took it and she gave it to me when she saw me. I guess that was nice of her.

    But when we were just hanging out on the street, all of a sudden they thought I was going home so when I turned around everyone started walking away, so I just went to my car and drove home. That was when I felt betrayed. It wasn't exactly my circle of friend but I did know a couple of people so I felt awkward there but I did have some conversations. But mostly I stayed quiet. So yah that's what happened.
  • Aug 16, 2009, 08:51 PM
    N0help4u

    I know a lot of guys that don't like groups or crowds. You can be friendly and talk to the girl but if she is pushy or reads too much into it then that is when you should get concerned.
  • Aug 16, 2009, 08:55 PM
    none12345
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by N0help4u View Post
    I know a lot of guys that don't like groups or crowds. You can be friendly and talk to the girl but if she is pushy or reads too much into it then that is when you should get concerned.
    Oh so its not just me who don't like groups or crowds?

    Well I don't exactly have contact with the girl N0help4u. We just share a few mutual friends and we get invited to the same place sometimes.
  • Aug 16, 2009, 09:00 PM
    N0help4u

    Well when you do see her make it a point to say hi asap.

    My boyfriend doesn't like crowds, neither does my daughters boyfriend, my dad hated crowds too.
    I know tons of guys that would rather hide in a small room than be in large groups or crowds
  • Aug 17, 2009, 02:59 AM
    Starry nights
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by none12345 View Post
    Hello guys, today i decided to actually accepted an invitation to dinner with a some people. I drove my friend there, showed up and for the whole dinner i said nothing more than a few words. Most of the people were friends of my friends. When i was there i just sat there quietly and after dinner everyone just left me alone there. Im not even sure if these people are my friends anymore or if they are just using me.

    Anyways theres this girl, i think she really likes me. She's been looking at me for a long time but i didnt say anything to her so after the dinner she got really mad and started being mean to me out of the no where. Im not sure what the problem is. Plus this girl, i have met her before like a year ago and the same thing happened. I didnt talk to her and she got mean at me again. After the first time, i asked my friend to find out what was wrong and she told me she likes me but i ignore her and dont even say hello. Now it has happened all over again tonight, i think.

    Anyways some people tried to talk to me and i responded, didnt make any friends. Plus after breaking up with my ex, i havent been really social and tonight everything just felt wierd around people. I think im not ready to be around people or ill ever be. Anyways thats about it. What do you guys think is the deal with this girl? Why do i feel so betrayed and feel like my friends arent really my friends? Am i being paranoid? Why do i feel so horrible? What do you guys think?
    Even though you may not quite like big groups and crowds,when you get invited to parties,you might want to put in more effort at being sociable.Just very small,casual things,like saying hi to people or putting on a smile,finding some topic of your interest to chat etc etc.
    Once you make this effort,it gets pretty easy actually to plaster that smile and feel yourself letting go and enjoying.

    As for that girl,if you really like her and want some reaction from her,why don't you just paying her some more attention,maybe singling her out in the party and asking her how she's doing simply.I can't say this about everybody but I personally am still pretty old-fashioned when it comes to dating.I still prefer the advances coming from the man initially:)
  • Aug 17, 2009, 06:49 AM
    talaniman

    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...et-375762.html

    Do you think this has anything to do with your mood?

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