Hi I'm at the end of my rope. I'm trying if being upset all the time but I can't help it. My hubby and I have been togather for 4 1/2 years but only married for a year 1/2. since we have been together he has got everything he has wanted a family and his tattoo shop. And when he started fixing the shop he started acting different ( like he hated everything and everyone) now his mom and dad had to move in with us because he is remolding their house for them now he is getting worst about everything. While his mom and dad have been hear his dad passed away and his mom is still here. I'm trying hard to understand why he is still being a jerk ( I understand his dad passed part but what I don't get is him treating me like I'm a maid in our home and his mom does it too I don't work I stay home to take care of the kids and I pay most of the bills with child support and I buy the food and I stand by him on what ever he does but he gets so upset all the time about everything so it makes me upset I tried talking to him about everything but he gets more mad. I see since his mom has been here he treats her like he use to treat me but now it is like me and the kids are not here to him and he has told me that no one matters to him but his mom so what do I do? Please help me this has been going on for 4 months and his dad just passed a week ago and I don't know what to do or say to him anymore with out upseting him thank you

Sounds like you need to get out of that arrangement asap. Sounds like he married you with every intention of wanting nothing more than a maid.

I think that there are probably a number of stressing elements here.

Your husband's father has just died and I think that he wants to look after his mother. If things have been bad for 4 months, I suspect it's because he's found his father's sickness and death hard to deal with. It's not unreasonable for him to say he wants to look after her at this time.

Although you've been unhappy for a while, I really believe that you should back off at the moment. The death of a parent - his father - is a huge thing to have to deal with and I would suggest that being loving and supportive is the best way you can respond.

Try and do some nice things for him to show him that you love him and let him know that you want to support him in his loss. Be patient. Of course he's going to be emotional! His father has only been dead a week.

Having said all that, don't let him or his mother treat you like a maid or treat you badly. Don't get mad, just be firm and gentle in your responses.