I am currently going through divorce and I finally received my wife's "Notice to Produce" documents and going through them I found that she has had a separate checking, saving and credit card account sent to her parents house that I was completely unaware of. The statements go back to 2006 it is 2009 now and it has been thousands if not tens of thousands of dollars. Every month several atm deposits and she has skimmed from every check that she ever made for the family. When she gets a paycheck a part goes into her own separate account and the rest goes to the marital checking account. Looking over her purchases it has all been for herself. Alcohol, Clothing stores, Starbucks, everything for her nothing for the kids or myself. What can I do? I have no attorney because I have no money should I go to the police and document this. We have two children which we are going through a ugly divorce and custody battle. I would like her to pay all the money back and go to jail. Does the court frown against this? Any ideas? THanks

I don't think there is anything you can do as far as getting her in legal trouble because she can just say you hand over the money and don't specify what is to be done with any monies
The money is joint basically because you are married.
But in the divorce you should be able to bring that account up for the dividing of the marital property.
Basically it would be your word against hers about how the money was meant to be used.

It is not illegal for her to save and put back part of her own money, even part of your money you earned.

There is nothing you can do, since there was nothing legally wrong.

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Originally Posted by CMMdivorce

I am currently going through divorce and I finally received my wifes "Notice to Produce" documents and going through them I found that she has had a seperate checking, saving and credit card account sent to her parents house that I was completely unaware of. The statements go back to 2006 it is 2009 now and it has been thousands if not tens of thousands of dollars. Every month several atm deposits and she has skimmed from every check that she ever made for the family. When she gets a paycheck a part goes into her own seperate account and the rest goes to the marital checking account. Looking over her purchases it has all been for herself. Alcohol, Clothing stores, Starbucks, everything for her nothing for the kids or myself. What can I do? I have no attorney because I have no money should I go to the police and document this. We have two children which we are going through a ugly divorce and custody battle. I would like her to pay all the money back and go to jail. Does the court frown against this? Any ideas? THanks

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Go to the police? For what for goodness sakes?

Why do you think she did something wrong?

If she had spent 100% of her paycheck on herself and not shared a penny with you or spent a penny on the kids that would have been okay--perfectly legal.

It may be morally wrong but it was her paycheck and she can have a separate hidden account on her own,without it being illegal.

"you cannot steal your own money" is the phrase you should remember here.

It is her money... she can spend it on what she wants. Did she leave the children hungry with out adequate food or clothing? That would be grounds for neglect but if she made sure they were taken care of who cares what she spend the rest of her money on. (obviously you but she it isn't illegal to spend your own money on yourself)

I know a lot of married people that have the joint account and their own separate account. I find it a bit shady but as everyone said there is nothing illegal about it. When my wife and I got our joint account she was afraid I would be asking her about every single purchase. I told her as long as the bills get paid I don't care what you buy.

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Originally Posted by spitvenom

I know a lot of married people that have the joint account and their own separate account. I find it a bit shady but as everyone said there is nothing illegal about it. When my wife and I got our joint account she was afraid I would be asking her about every single purchase. I told her as long as the bills get paid I don't care what you buy.

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My wife has her own account. She likes having it because she knows that whatever money is there she can spend on whatever she wants/needs without worrying about affecting the household spending account.

I don't ask what she spends it on and frankly, I would be perfectly happy not having her recount the 45 minute decision making process of choosing a new tank top... but she does anyway.

http://www.illinoisdivorce.com/_pdf/...l_property.pdf

I am trying to understand how everyone is concluding that this is non-marital property. Everything done following a marriage becomes marital property, her account, unless all activity was done prior to the marriage ceremony would be marital property, whether it is in her name, his or both.

Please clarify how that is not accurate?

EDIT: I agree, her uses of the monies were not illegal.

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Originally Posted by Justwantfair

http://www.illinoisdivorce.com/_pdf/...l_property.pdf

I am trying to understand how everyone is concluding that this is non-marital property. Everything done following a marriage becomes marital property, her account, unless all activity was done prior to the marriage ceremony would be marital property, whether it is in her name, his or both.

Please clarify how that is not accurate?

EDIT: I agree, her uses of the monies were not illegal.

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Because it was spent while in the marriage. If the account were full that would be subject to the divorce. The fact that it was spent already was a communication/trust problem, not a legal problem.

Ok, I see where the focus is, he wants to recover the monies, not freeze the account.
My misunderstanding.

I would be perfectly happy not having her recount the 45 minute decision making process of choosing a new tank top... but she does anyway.

LOL. I love it.