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-   -   Not feeling (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=383433)

  • Aug 4, 2009, 02:02 PM
    MutatReklaw
    Not feeling
    I don't know what to do, I have no one I can talk to, I try to talk to my wife and we always end up fighting, I am tired of fighting, I am tired of everything
    Maybe this isn't how this works, I'm just low on options
    I don't feel sorry for myself, I actually feel sorry for my wife, I don't make her happy & it infuriates me with her, nothing I do or say is ever the "right thing", I'm just getting to where I really don't care
    Is their hope?
  • Aug 4, 2009, 02:05 PM
    artlady

    There is hope because you are reaching out to make a change.

    What is going on that is causing all the arguing?

    Is you wife expecting more than you can give at this time?

    How long married?Are you suffering from depression?

    Some background would be helpful to be able to give a better answer.
  • Aug 4, 2009, 02:11 PM
    MutatReklaw

    We have been married for 14 years, we have worked together for the past 10 or 11, last year we opened a new business & things have been rough, she is a pesimistic, I am a procrastinator
    We have 2 kids - 13 & 4
    Fights range from money to having nothing to talk about other than business
  • Aug 4, 2009, 02:14 PM
    MutatReklaw

    Yeah, I guess both myself & my wife would probably fall under the category of depressed as well
  • Aug 4, 2009, 02:25 PM
    MutatReklaw

    Things have been bad for a long time, I think we're still together for the kids
    Sounds pretty crappy seeing it actually written down
    We dated for 4 years before we got married - I wasn't a very good boyfriend, probably not a good husband or dad either
    Like I said, I'm pretty well giving up
    Its not that I don't love them, I just think she might be happier without me
    I look in her face and it kills me to see she can't stand me, I know I don't treat her like a princess or show emotion like I should, like she deserves, its just not the kind of guy I am
    She wants to be swept off her feet, I can't do that for her
  • Aug 4, 2009, 02:38 PM
    MutatReklaw

    Oh well, its time to go home , I don't know if I should, I just want to cave in right here... guess I'll go
  • Aug 4, 2009, 02:50 PM
    artlady

    You do sound very depressed and confused.

    If you are staying together for your children,I would say ,you should rethink that.

    A broken home life where there is constant tension and fighting is a bad environment for everyone.
    The kids are suffering because they are helpless to change it and yet they have to live with it.

    What makes you think she can't stand you?

    Have you sat down and had a conversation about where your marriage is going and how you can improve it and equally, if not more important, how this is affecting your children?
  • Aug 5, 2009, 02:03 PM
    MutatReklaw

    I can't just leave them.
  • Aug 5, 2009, 08:55 PM
    artlady
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by MutatReklaw View Post
    I can't just leave them.

    I would not suggest such a thing unless the household had become so dysfunctional as to be intolerable for everyone.
    Constant fighting is not good for anyone.
    Is there anyway that you and your wife could seek counseling?
    I know money is tight these days but as the risk of sounding bossy,I think it would be money very well spent if you were able to save your marriage and reunite as a couple.

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