My girlfriend and my mother have now both told me that I am self-centered or should I say selfish. I don't see this because I am always thinking about other people. The only way I can see this in anyway is I use relations with "I" to topics. I don't want this ruinning my relationship. I feel this is changeable. How do I go about not showing/being so selfish?

More info please.

I think you should say all of the time you haven't been self centered.and then ask them about the times that you were self centered and say that you didn't know and your sorry for them thinking that you were trying to be (:

I meant times you haven't been self centered.

You definitely need to ask them about the areas you need to work on... otherwise, there's not enough information for us to really help you out.

I agree with the others be open and ask them to give you some examples of things you do that make them feel this way.

How about next time you go to start a sentence with I, substitute it with some sort of animal, for example instead of, " I do everything perfect." you could go with, "Penguins do everything perfect" or "Spider-Monkeys do everything perfect."

Just an idea.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by LifeChangesMan

how about next time you go to start a sentence with I, substitute it with some sort of animal, for example instead of, " I do everything perfect." you could go with, "Penguins do everything perfect" or "Spider-Monkeys do everything perfect."

Just an idea.

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Er, what? How bizarre. I sort of like the suggestion because it's like something out of Monty Python's Flying Circus ( the parrot did it not me! ), but I'm not sure how it will assist him to focus on others rather than himself.. . his family might just end up calling the men in white coats...

I believe he was using sarcasm to prove a point.
To make it more serious.

Original; self-centered: I think we should go to the movies.
After changing his style: Do you want to go to the movies?

Think it's good advice, but needed a more relatable way to say it.

Ask them what areas you need to improve on this way you can go into it with information on what to improve.

It is changeable and I would have said perhaps it was a misunderstanding but when Mom AND the G.F. agree,its time to pay attention.
Ask them to be specific and to give you examples of what they mean.
In the future,try to include others in conversation and truly listen.
People who are self centered generally don't honestly listen and appreciate others input.
It is not something I think can be faked so look at why you behave this way to really get to the crux of the issue.