I am a single parent of a difficult teen. So introducing or bringing anyone around my daughter makes me cringe. I have joined a local gym and don't go out much. The thought of computer dating does not appeal to me. I have been single for far to long and would like to meet someone. The person whom admired for years lives abroad and does not think a romantic relationship between us would work.

So I must abandoned all hope in that thought and move forward. Any suggestions on how to meet without sitting on the computer or on a bar stool...

What 2 do... :)

How old is your difficult teen?
What hobbies do you enjoy?
Leagues?
Just building up your social network, can help in finding Mr. Right.

My difficult teen is 15. Hobbies; I don't really have any other than Yoga, going to the movies, etc. No leagues.

How do you build up a social network and keep costs down, in this economy. I just took on a car payment...

You like yoga, try picking up guys in a yoga class! ;)

It's really easy to build up your social network, for free!
Check around for free events. Don't go to "wrestlemania smackfest" just because you think guys will be there, you want to go to something that you like to find a good guy that will click with you.

Hang around the mall, the park, another public place. Meet some more people, find out where they have fun free/cheap, pick it up from there. Once you start, it'll be really easy.

Sorry I slightly disagree with the previous poster... I hope that they didn't mean it but hanging round parks and the mall checking guys out and lunging at guys in a yoga class is not my idea of creating relationships! Apologies (many of them) if this is not what you meant, but it does create a mental picture of a total desperado, which I'm sure the poster does not want!

My suggestion is that the way to create relationships is the same way that you would create friends - through shared interests and common values. Don't think about it in terms of just meeting guys - think about it in terms of extending your friendship network - because that is usually how you meet people that you like. In other words, it is through your old friends and your new friends you might meet men that you like.

So, you might make new friends though the school, your difficult teen's friends parents, a book club, a movie club, whatever. Let your old friends know you're interested in meeting someone but also let them know you don't want to be 'blind dated' or put into embarrassing situations. Don't pass up opportunities to go out with people from your yoga class, go to your teen's school functions and sports events, invite acquaintances rather than friends to go to the movies with you.

As I said, it's about extending your friendship network and taking up opportunities to meet people. See it as a way to enjoy yourself and have fun rather than a quest to find the one. When you're happy and having a good time, you never know what might happen!

So why don't you like online dating,

Next what about other social activities, like religious meetings.

And if you don't go out, start, what do you like to do, but don't go to bars if you want someone that does not drink for example.

Sounds like you want a prince charming but expect to set in your castle with a draw bridge up and wonder why you are not dting.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Gemini54

Sorry I slightly disagree with the previous poster ... I hope that they didn't mean it but hanging round parks and the mall checking guys out and lunging at guys in a yoga class is not my idea of creating relationships! Apologies (many of them) if this is not what you meant, but it does create a mental picture of a total desperado, which I'm sure the poster does not want!

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After going back and reading, I see how you can see it like that.
What I meant, was go somewhere you like hanging out, for free (since she mentioned the economic condition) to meet people who like the same interests as her. Not only for guys, but for girls, making friends and broadening her social horizons.
No appoligies necessary, It does sound like that the way it was originally worded.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by HelpinHere

After going back and reading, I see how you can see it like that.
What I meant, was go somewhere you like hanging out, for free (since she mentioned the economic condition) to meet people who like the same interests as her. Not only for guys, but for girls, making friends and broadening her social horizons.
No appoligies necessary, It does sound like that the way it was originally worded.

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No probs!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Gemini54

Let your old friends know you're interested in meeting someone but also let them know you don't want to be 'blind dated' or put into embarrassing situations.

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Had to spread rep. I like this suggestion the most. Introduction by friends is an excellent way of meeting new people. At least they are pre-screened too. So it's a little bit better than online dating.

But don't give up on the online dating, because someone might click.

You can also ask co-workers if they might know someone for you.

Here is the problem folks, all of my god friends live up North and I have very few friends in Florida. (should have never moved here to begin with) As for my co-workers; I would rather not go there, that is a last resort. Most are married, the others single. (and for a good reason). Someone suggested Events and Adventures; does anybody have any experience or know of someone who did? They could be pricey. I even tried the gourmet dating thing... (hated eating with strangers) not my thing...

I still say from your other two posts, you have to get your family life under control before you can think about dating. I understand that it is lonely, but you will only have toxic relationships when the rest of your life is out of control.

I highly recommend counseling for you first. You have to find out why you allow people in your life to treat you so poorly, if you don't find out, you will probably come back because your boyfriend or husband is abusive and nasty to you.

For the other posters:

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/teens/...me-382967.html

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/other-...ty-382990.html

I was thinking about the today in my car. Your 100% right about that. Or are these people just simply mean? And mean to me?Sometimes it is just in ones nature not to be nice. Perhaps it is not why I allow it, that's just the way they are to everybody. I just get the brunt of it, since I am more accessible.

Counseling is in order again... have spent most of my life in it. Better get used to it...

The funny thing about this is, if there is any humor at all, I am very good to them. I assure this will cease.

Sometimes being good to mean people, will only worsen the problem.
I don't know the specifics, but it surely isn't good that you get it from both directions.
Have you been to counseling with your daughter?
I would hate to think that she will just carry on a vicious cycle of poor behavior.
Maybe counseling together, can help to give the two of you a fresh start.

She had accompanied me twice, always finds something about any physician that she hates/dislikes etc. I always present the option of choosing any Doctor of her choice, be it General Practitioner etc... she never takes me up on it.

Claims she hates doctors and refuses to go to any. I offered this child a gym membership along with mine to help her esteem, didn't want that either. Hates everything and just about everyone. Full of negativity. Truly lethal

Has anyone had any experiences with Events and Adventures?

I would suggest as the others have about going places and all but unless you actually get an opportunity to talk to people I don't see much of a chance of meeting anybody unless you were to wear a sign saying single and available but then you come of looking desperate. I go to many festivals and get around a good bit some summers and I have yet to have guys walk up to me and be interested. Either there is something about them that spells 'creepy' if they do or you have to have something about you that really attracts guys.

I will keep my hope alive in finding a boe in the gym.