Please help.

I am losing my faith in God. Actually, Im a roman catholic, I hope it doesn't make much of a difference under this Christianity category.

Lately, I've just gone through a really upsetting break up. I cannot take the pain. I've been talking to God a lot about my r/s and asking him to give me strength to handle my r/s to the best of my abilities and I prayed long and hard to not get hurt. Because this is my first serious r/s where I actually made an effort for a guy. I know a lot of people will tell me, maybe god has something better. Or, it's a test of your faith.

Well you know what? Im sick of tests of faith. I'm sick of having to deal with this kind of pain. This is not the first time I've prayed for guidance and prayed for God to be here for me.. but every time it just seems to make me feel even more miserable. How am I supposed to believe in God anymore if I'm made to go through trials and tribulations. Im tired of it. I know of friends who don't have religions or are christians but don't practise their faith. AND yet, they aren't sufferning as much as I am.

I really hate this pain. Please help.

First of all, Roman Catholics are Christians. In fact, they were the first Christians.

Even if you weren't a Christian, there would still be suffering in your life. You may not see suffering in the lives of other people, but it's there. Just being in this world and living life means there will be suffering along the way--suffering in relationships, suffering when losing loved ones to death, suffering in disease, suffering in economic hardship.

It's difficult to see someone else's suffering when we are so wrapped up in our own. Many people hide it or rise above it or deny it, but it's there. It's a guarantee for being human. Also, there's suffering and there's suffering--suffering as a bump in the road of life or suffering that freezes us into immobility. We are subject to both kinds, and to all forms in between.

It's how we handle suffering that is important. Do we curse God or use it as a "teachable moment"? As in your case, there is no guarantee any of our relationships will ever be perfect. We are all human and fallible; we all make mistakes and forget to show each other love and respect. We think about what went wrong, figure out our part in the wrongness, forgive ourselves and the other person, and eventually move forward into a stronger and more God-pleasing relationship.

Life is about lessons and being a good student and applying what we have learned to become a better person.

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Originally Posted by Pixiedust123

Please help.

I am losing my faith in God. Actually, Im a roman catholic, I hope it doesnt make much of a difference under this Christianity catagory.

Lately, I've just gone through a really upsetting break up. I cannot take the pain. I've been talking to God alot about my r/s and asking him to give me strength to handle my r/s to the best of my abilities and I prayed long and hard to not get hurt. Because this is my first serious r/s where I actually made an effort for a guy. I know alot of people will tell me, maybe god has something better. Or, its a test of your faith.

Well you knw what? Im sick of tests of faith. I'm sick of having to deal with this kinda pain. This is not the first time I've prayed for guidance and prayed for God to be here for me.. but everytime it just seems to make me feel even more miserable. How am I supposed to believe in God anymore if I'm made to go thru trials and tribulations. Im tired of it. I know of friends who dont have religions or are christians but dont practise their faith. AND yet, they arent sufferning as much as I am.

I really hate this pain. Please help.

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First, Sorry about your suffering. Break ups suck; and it hurts, and life a lot of times sucks, whether you have faith in God or not.

You are doing the right thing by telling God of your pain. David did this a lot in the Psalms.
God will you give you strength and comfort and though it may take time you will come out better in the long run.



G&P

I lost my faith a long time age and it's worked out for the better, I live to sin because I have to make this life livable. I also love not going to church on Sundays, Now I can really enjoy football. Just go out pick up 3 inches of blood CD and blast the song deadly sinners and you'll feel way better!

When we ask God for things and we do things and we think that was God answering our prays but really we were just TAKING what we wanted and thinking God was in it. Then we think God was testing our faith.

Testing our faith is more when God says NO he is not the one for you and we don't go after the guy or whatever we prayed for.

When we go into his permissible will it rarely works out because God knows what is best for us. So what you need is to heal your hurts, learn your lessons and move on asking God to reveal his will not what we want.

Our faith is not strong if we look to the things that please us and gratify us to see God in it.
It is the simple things that God reveals himself in. Not what happened or didn't happen in your life.
It doesn't work God didn't give me that boyfriend so my faith is low and weak
God gave me a house so my faith is strong.

Our faith is based on knowing God in spite of what we have or don't have.

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

First of all, Roman Catholics are Christians. In fact, they were the first Christians.

Even if you weren't a Christian, there would still be suffering in your life. You may not see suffering in the lives of other people, but it's there. Just being in this world and living life means there will be suffering along the way--suffering in relationships, suffering when losing loved ones to death, suffering in disease, suffering in economic hardship.

It's difficult to see someone else's suffering when we are so wrapped up in our own. Many people hide it or rise above it or deny it, but it's there. It's a guarantee for being human. Also, there's suffering and there's suffering--suffering as a bump in the road of life or suffering that freezes us into immobility. We are subject to both kinds, and to all forms in between.

It's how we handle suffering that is important. Do we curse God or use it as a "teachable moment"? As in your case, there is no guarantee any of our relationships will ever be perfect. We are all human and fallible; we all make mistakes and forget to show each other love and respect. We think about what went wrong, figure out our part in the wrongness, forgive ourselves and the other person, and eventually move forward into a stronger and more God-pleasing relationship.

Life is about lessons and being a good student and applying what we have learned to become a better person.

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Yes, I do know that the Roman Catholics were the very first Christians, Im just not sure everyone knew that. :)

I know that everyone has sufferings, I just don't get why believers of God just seem to have even more pain and suffering. Why? Just to make up for the fact that God died for us? I used to be a strong believer of my faith, I believed so hard that God existed and that everything that happened, happened for a reason.

Now I just ask myself, if so, what are the reasons? I just never seem to know what the reasons are, how do I find them out? I talk to God, but it doesn't work. Honestly, I feel like Im talking to myself. And, maybe I am. I'm just glad no one sees me talking to myself.

I started telling myself that because I really did not know how to make better decisions in life and how I didn't have the wisdom to do what's really best for myself, I told myself that anything else that happens, I'll always try to take them as a sign from God in tellign me what I have to do next.

Guess what? It obviously didn't work, I had too many "signs" I didn't know which was best or which was really even coming from God or just my own overactive imagination.

It's how we handle suffering that is important. Do we curse God or use it as a "teachable moment"? I tried the latter at first, then it got to be too painful to really believe God is teaching me. If he is, why can't he spare me some of the pain? I'm not like Him, I'm only human.

We think about what went wrong, figure out our part in the wrongness, forgive ourselves and the other person, and eventually move forward into a stronger and more God-pleasing relationship. Yeah, I hoped that would be the case in the future, but I'm now at a low point. I don't think I'm just very convinced anymore that there's a God.

In fact, I'm slowly stopping going for masses and taking the eucharist and such. I got confirmed last year... Ironic huh?

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Originally Posted by inthebox

First, Sorry about your suffering. Break ups suck; and it hurts, and life alot of times sucks, whether you have faith in God or not.

You are doing the right thing by telling God of your pain. David did this alot in the Psalms.
God wil you give you strength and comfort and though it may take time you will come out better in the long run.



G&P

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Yeah, maybe Im tired of waiting already.

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Originally Posted by Pixiedust123

I just don't get why believers of God just seem to have even more pain and suffering. Why?

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They don't.

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I don't think I'm just very convinced anymore that there's a God.

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That's okay. God is carrying you in the palm of his hand. He wants you to take care of your depression by seeing your doctor or a psychiatrist. God will be with you all the way.

A famous man once said that "doubts are the ants-in-the-pants of faith." That's where you are now, with a bunch of ants in your pants. Faith is there too. If it weren't, you wouldn't be asking the question in the first place.

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Originally Posted by N0help4u

When we ask God for things and we do things and we think that was God answering our prays but really we were just TAKING what we wanted and thinking God was in it. Then we think God was testing our faith.

Testing our faith is more when God says NO he is not the one for you and we don't go after the guy or whatever we prayed for.

When we go into his permissible will it rarely works out because God knows what is best for us. So what you need is to heal your hurts, learn your lessons and move on asking God to reveal his will not what we want.

Our faith is not strong if we look to the things that please us and gratify us to see God in it.
It is the simple things that God reveals himself in. Not what happened or didn't happen in your life.
It doesn't work God didn't give me that bf so my faith is low and weak
God gave me a house so my faith is strong.

Our faith is based on knowing God in spite of what we have or don't have.

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When we ask God for things and we do things and we think that was God answering our prays but really we were just TAKING what we wanted and thinking God was in it. Then we think God was testing our faith. [

Exactly! So my question is, how do I know if it's really God answering me by showing me the way or is it just my over active imagination? I really want the signs because I know at this point, I'm not good at making the right decisions. I know, we make mistakes and learn from them but at this point, I don't wna keep making bad decisions.

When we go into his permissible will it rarely works out because God knows what is best for us.

So.. why do we bother? Since it rarely works out.. then why bother trying if we're just going to fail?

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

They don't.

That's okay. God is carrying you in the palm of his hand. He wants you to take care of your depression by seeing your doctor or a psychiatrist. God will be with you all the way.

A famous man once said that "doubts are the ants-in-the-pants of faith." That's where you are now, with a bunch of ants in your pants. Faith is there too. If it weren't, you wouldn't be asking the question in the first place.

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Are you sure that believers of God don't have more suffering? Why is it that when I observe.. around me it just seems that way? I know of friends and family who are catholics but don't bother practising it. Yet, they just seem to not have much sufferings. I know of friends who are staunch Christians. And yet, they seem to go through so much of sufferings and pain. I know because they're my good friends/closer family members. So it's really not as though I'm just being paranoid or thinking too much. They tell me their problems.. and I wonder.. why would "God" make his own "children" suffer if they really want to follow his ways and him??

Faith is there too. If it weren't, you wouldn't be asking the question in the first place.
Yes of course. I want to believe. I obviously don't want to completely ditch my religion. But.. like I said, I just really need convincing to believe that there really is God out there helping me out. How can I know? He doesn't speak to me. Like I said earlier, it's as though Im talking to the wall/myself.

The reason is because people in the world can just do whatever and it doesn't phase them. If their boyfriend breaks up with them Yes they do suffer emotional hurt but they cuss them out in their mind and figure out what they are going to do next to get them back or get even or whatever.
Christians suffer more because they want God but they want THEIR will.
We chase after what we want and don't truly ask God to show us what he wants.
We want this boyfriend, God wants us to go without a boyfriend for awhile and wants us to find our direction in life and where we should be. Guess who wins! We are running around with the boyfriend that isn't the one God has for us and ignoring where we should be. Then we wonder why God hasn't brought the right guy into our life.
Its because we aren't making our priorities right about God's perfect will for us.

I use to always be getting into the wrong relationships and not finding where I should be.
Now I do ask God to show me and tell him that I want his will rather than chasing after the wrong things.
The more I do the more I do hear him speak to me.

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Originally Posted by Pixiedust123

In fact, I'm slowly stopping going for masses and taking the eucharist and such. I got confirmed last year... Ironic huh?

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First let me say I am not Catholic, however I am Christian, and I strongly believe in Christ.

What I would ask you is who is the winner?

We can be so weak at times, and give into our own weakness. We blame God when instead we should open our eyes. Are there others around us that lead us? Are we accepting, and being held accountable to others, and their actions. Why do we not see, what we have accepted and made ourselves accountable to?

Are we so in love with the mistreatment of that r/s, that we don't see that it hurt us?

I don't believe God reached down, and took the r/s away. I believe instead that God sees the pain you are suffering. And God can give you HIS help "if" you stay tune to HIS open door.

Is there something learned during our experiences in life? Most assuredly we do become stronger from our weakness. What I would say is stand with God, and allow HIM to carry you for now.. But when the time comes to stand strong, remember who can guide you to be a stronger. Pray that weakness of flesh bows down and flees from you, so no harm is caused to you or others.

Compare your pain to what Christ suffered on earth: For though he was crucified through weakness, yet he liveth by the power of God. For we also are weak in him, but we shall live with him by the power of God toward you. (otherwise there is no hope)

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Originally Posted by Pixiedust123

Are you sure that believers of God don't have more suffering? Why is it that when I observe.. around me it just seems that way? I know of friends and family who are catholics but don't bother practising it. Yet, they just seem to not have much sufferings. I know of friends who are staunch Christians. And yet, they seem to go through so much of sufferings and pain. I know because they're my good friends/closer family members. So it's really not as though I'm just being paranoid or thinking too much. They tell me their problems.. and I wonder.. why would "God" make his own "children" suffer if they really want to follow his ways and him???
.

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Yes it seems true. The apostles all became martyrs.

I know of widows and widowers that rely on their faith to get them through. I've known parents that have lost children or have children with serious medical problems and they keep the faith.

God does not promise a pleasant life. His son suffered more than I can imagine.

But what faith is it if it is not tested? Or only present in the "good times?"
Would we want friends, family, our spouse to be that way?


Hang in there, Pixie... I hope your suffering will diminish.





G&P

I wanted to add to what Inthebox said
Martyrs are martyred for Jesus name
What we do when we are in God's permissive will is our own suffering and what we learn from it is what is important.
Every lesson, every trial we go through either makes us or breaks us. It is how we utilize what we learn from the choices we make.
Do we draw closer to God, do we become bitter toward God, do we turn from our ways and become more submissive to God's will rather than what we want?

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Originally Posted by Pixiedust123

Please help.

I am losing my faith in God. Actually, Im a roman catholic, I hope it doesnt make much of a difference under this Christianity catagory.

Lately, I've just gone through a really upsetting break up. I cannot take the pain. I've been talking to God alot about my r/s and asking him to give me strength to handle my r/s to the best of my abilities and I prayed long and hard to not get hurt. Because this is my first serious r/s where I actually made an effort for a guy. I know alot of people will tell me, maybe god has something better. Or, its a test of your faith.

Well you knw what? Im sick of tests of faith. I'm sick of having to deal with this kinda pain. This is not the first time I've prayed for guidance and prayed for God to be here for me.. but everytime it just seems to make me feel even more miserable. How am I supposed to believe in God anymore if I'm made to go thru trials and tribulations. Im tired of it. I know of friends who dont have religions or are christians but dont practise their faith. AND yet, they arent sufferning as much as I am.

I really hate this pain. Please help.

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Try giving up your faith and see how you feel. I'd bet you'd feel a lot better.

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Originally Posted by N0help4u

The reason is because people in the world can just do whatever and it doesn't phase them. If their bf breaks up with them Yes they do suffer emotional hurt but they cuss them out in their mind and figure out what they are going to do next to get them back or get even or whatever.
Christians suffer more because they want God but they want THEIR will.
We chase after what we want and don't truly ask God to show us what he wants.
We want this bf, God wants us to go without a bf for awhile and wants us to find our direction in life and where we should be. Guess who wins! We are running around with the bf that isn't the one God has for us and ignoring where we should be. Then we wonder why God hasn't brought the right guy into our life.
Its because we aren't making our priorities right about God's perfect will for us.

I use to always be getting into the wrong relationships and not finding where I should be.
Now I do ask God to show me and tell him that I want his will rather than chasing after the wrong things.
The more I do the more I do hear him speak to me.

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Okay, then tell me how am I supposed to know what God's will is. I mentioned before that I tried talking and everything but I don't get answers on what I'm supposed to be doing. I know of people who are so devoted and stuff then that's when they hear what God wants them to do.

If that's the only way to hear God, or know of God's will.. (by being so into the bible, etc) I don't think I can do it. It's not like I didn't try... no matter how hard I tried (and I did try my best) I still don't seem to hear anything.

I hope this isn't confusing, it's just kind of difficult putting my thoughts and annoyance into words.

Pixie,
I was raised Roman Catholic, went to those schools, the whole nine yards. It never really caught on with me. I'm atheist now, so is my wife and kids and life is good (not that it wasn't before). Just wanted you to see one option available to you. Not having a belief is not the end of the world.

You keep praying, asking for direction and don't jump into things because you desperately want them. Listen to your gut instinct over your head and your feelings that you have to have something.

I ended up divoriced because I just had to be married because I wanted it so bad. In the meantime something kept telling me it was a bad decision and I kept excusing it as pre wedding jitters. I was wrong because I get the feeling every time I want to do something and it isn't what I should be doing.

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Originally Posted by tarnoldwild

I lost my faith a long time age and it's worked out for the better, I live to sin because I have to make this life livable. I also love not going to church on Sundays, Now I can really enjoy football. Just go out pick up 3 inches of blood CD and blast the song deadly sinners and you'll feel way better!

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This is exactly what many of us have experienced (with the exception of the football--not interested in that).

One more thing,

I was thinking about this today.

One thing that might be good for you is to look to God and not religion. Look for the spiritual things of God. There is a difference between religion and being set free in your spirit.

Every real Christian goes through valleys where they don't feel God's presence. Like a writers block or an artist not feeling the inspiration to draw. God allows us to go through the highs and the lows to learn to lean on him through it all. He also wants to make us stronger in that.

Here is a story in the Bible that may help you.

mark Bible Study - Mark 4:1-34 - The character of people in God's kingdom