Ask Me Help Desk - What is 'normal' and what could my daughters vision be?

I'm not worried about it. So don't think I am.

But I am curious.

I've been asking a lot of health questions lately. That's because my 5 year old starts school in 18 days and I've been doing the whole checkup, dentist, vision, hair cut, etc sort of thing. Making everything nice and fresh lol.

So at the eye doctor, she got checked. And I'm almost positive she will need glasses. Everyone in my family has them, and everyone on her bio dads family has them.

But aparently she does not.

The doctor said she has a SLIGHT near sighted ness. But not enough to make her need glasses.

So I'm curious to know what that means?

Mmm. That doesn't help explain my question.

What would be the accuall prescription of 'normal vision'

There is no such thing as "normal" vision for any age or gender. Genetics certainly plays a role in it, so does nutrition and habits.

It's good that you are concerned. If the doctor says that she has a slight prescription but not enough to warrant glasses that means it's probably around a -.50. Meaning not quite 1 diopter. So not very serious at all. You could go to another eye doctor who might prescribe her glasses, and another that says that she has 20/20 vision. She's young and her perception of things like exact instructions and multiple choice are more limited than an adult. Some kids honestly get tired of the "which is better, 1 or 2" so they just started rattling off numbers. If you notice her squinting when she shouldn't be take her in again. But for now, she is most likely fine. Annual check-ups are a great idea as well.

Hope that helps and somewhat answers your question. Good luck to you and your little one, Jenni.

And OBVIOUSLY, feel free to ask more questions in the Vision section. I don't get nearly enough ACTUAL questions here. Give me some work, woman! LOL. Wish you all the best. HUGS.

Hehe yes ma'am plenty of questions. :P

I buy my glasses online at a place called www.zennioptical.com and I have for years. I love their glasses, and at 8$ for frames and another perhapes 10 for the lenses, you can't beat that price! LOL.

However they don't CHECK the prescription you put in. and while I have never lied on my prescriptions myself, do you think there would be any harm in getting some glasses for her at perhapes a -.25 prescription? She is DYING to wear glasses lol. And she is being very very good about it (not throwing fits, not asking over and over and over again, not DEMANDING it) so I was curious if it would be OK.

EDIT* and don't worrie, of course I know I would need to see another doctor for her accuall mesurements, if she is anything like me she will most likely not have spherical eyes :P my eye balls are shaped like eggs ;)

Yes Zenni is well known, the radio and TV host Clark Howard does a lot of talking about them. Of course issues of fitting, no customer service and the classes being made in a 3rd word nation. But for people on a limited budget they do provide needed eye wear

Quote:

Originally Posted by jenniepepsi

however they dont CHECK the prescription you put in. and while i have never lied on my prescriptions myself, do you think there would be any harm in getting some glasses for her at perhapes a -.25 prescription? she is DYING to wear glasses lol. and she is being very very good about it (not throwing fits, not asking over and over and over again, not DEMANDING it) so i was curious if it would be ok.

Munchausen Syndrome, I am now convinced.

Are you serious? You would like to get your daughter glasses? Do you not understand that you just had her checked and the qualified eye doctor did not believe that she needed eyeglasses yet.

Will she need them in the future? Probably, but you honestly believe that it is a good idea to let your daughter have her every wish? Do you see in anyway how this could be contributing to dysfunction?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

Yes Zenni is well known, the radio and TV host Clark Howard does alot of talking about them. Of course issues of fitting, no customer service and the classes being made in a 3rd word nation. But for people on a limited budget they do provide needed eye wear

I never had any problems with no customer service. Once my glasses were late, and I called them and I got no waiting on hold, and they apologised and said that when they first made them, the tint didn't turn out properly so they had to redo them, and they would be shipped over night due to the delay. And they DID ship it right away.

Yeah not having a fitting is sometimes difficult, but usually as long as you have your pupillary distance they usually come out OK.

I didn't know they were made in a 3rd world country. In a good way like outsourcing? Or a bad way like slave work shops? If I am getting my glasses from a slavelike warehouse, I am going to stop using them.

Jennie, why would you get your daughter glasses if she doesn't need them?

My daughter wants a pony, she's been really good about it, not throwing a temper tantrum, should I get her one?

You've said that she has behavior problems, well getting everything she wants can contribute to that.

There are some things that you have to put your foot down on. Glasses, when she doesn't need them, is one of those things, IMO.

I have to agree with the prior sentiments.

Getting her glasses when she doesn't need them can cause her more problems - like do you really want to deal with a 5 year old that's having headaches?

CM made excellent points - pay attention to her behavior if she's squinting, etc. Otherwise, put your foot down and tell her she can't have glasses because she doesn't need them.

Yeah fine. Maybe ill just stop being concerned about anything. Because its obvious that being concerned about my daughter makes me a bad parent. (implied in more than one place, not just on this thread. At least that's the way I took it. Sorry if I am wrong)

NO ONE here spends all day with her like I do. No one here sees her sitting really close to the TV, no one here sees her squinting once I ask her to back up so that it doesn't hurt her eyes. No one sees her stick her face REALLY close into a book we are reading together so that she can see it. No one sees her mistake a B for an O or F.

I'm not going to argue with you guys on this subject anymore. Yes, it SEEMS like I am over cautious, over zealous, however, it only seems like that because when I grew up, it was a routine for my family before school starts each year to visit the doctor, dentist, barber, and eye doctor (and in aylas case, her dermotoligist for ezcema (which gets very bad sometimes) and her allergist and pulumnologist for her asthma, and her speech therepist, and her occupational therepist) so this is what I have done with ayla over the last week, because school starts in 2 weeks for her.

So yes, I have questions, due to these apointments, that I forget to ask the doctor/specialist, and I simply assumed that's what this board was here for, so that I don't have to pay a copay to ask a simple question that most people on this site can answer...

I'm not going to bother to explain myself anymore...

Jennie, read your threads, Ayla seems to have a lot of issues, every day you start a new thread or 2 or 3 asking about things that you've already discussed with a doctor, or things that shouldn't be that hard to figure out.

It's just a bit odd. You have more threads then I do and I've been here since 2007 and usually start all the chat threads (no one else wants to :()

As for sitting close to the TV and your other concerns, that's normal for her age. My son and daughter do the same thing, they have to be reminded to move back.

If you really think she needs glasses, that the eye doctor is wrong, then get a second opinion, but buying her glasses just because she wants to wear them, not a good idea.

Have you ever wondered if she's squinting because she wants glasses and knows that you'll get them for her if she pretends to have problems seeing? Kids can be very manipulative in order to get what they want.

Quote:

Originally Posted by jenniepepsi

she is DYING to wear glasses

What about glasses with just plain glass in the frames, or a cute pair of sunglasses for when you two are out and about?

That's a really good idea WG I didn't think of that. Thanks. I bet that would be perfect.

That's a good point alty, about her possibly pretending to squint so that she can get them. She has done that before lol.

She mostly wants them because a few of her friends have them. And while I know its wrong, I just can't help but wanting to get her stuff she wants simply because (and please don't take this as an excuse, I know it doesn't excuse me being over critical) my mother played favorites with me and my brother and sister. My brother was the popular jock, my sister was the popular smart cheerleader girl. Where as I was the adhd kid with no friends, getting Fs and Ds, but at the same time trying to be SO social it got annoying. (if you can't tell just from talking to me on here ;) ) my sister and brother always got exactly what the wanted, new clothing, new shoes, that cool purse because everyone else had it. Where as I never got any extras, my mom took me to good will or the thrift store to buy me out of date 'wierd' clothing. And while I understand that money can be tight (I am living proof) if she had enough money to spoil my brother and sister, why did I not merit a spoiling every now and then? I also did not get to go to the dentist or doctor unless it was an emergency or going to a vaccination clinic.

So while I am trying SO SO HARD not to turn into my mother and put her through what I went through, I agree, I tend to go over board and over compensate... and I'm trying hard not to do that too... its just.. well hard sometimes (sorry for using hard too often lol)

*also that's the main reason I tend to let her 'get away' with things when she has 'melt downs' or throws fits. Because my mother was the opposite of me. Very abusive and even the slightest infraction, evet at the age of 6 or 7, would get a severe beating with my dads leather belt (while it was wet and my pants were down I might add) so again, I try so hard not to be like that, that I end up on the opposite side of the spectrum. And I can't seem to find a happy medium.

Your daughter and you have countless issues, I am not disagreeing with that but...

Quote:

Originally Posted by jenniepepsi

NO ONE here spends all day with her like i do.

Like I stated yesterday, for someone logging more than 10 hours a day into one site (and there are other sites that you participate in)... how much attention are you really paying to help your daughter?? Maybe you need to spend more time with her and a lot less time with us, if you want your daughter to have a chance at a healthy life. Come here when you have a question, not when you need a new chat about something.

I have lost my patience for someone who wants to act so concerned, but then is not taking the suggestions and time needed with her daughter to correct the situation.

It's like talking to a brick wall and I have been patient and I have been trying but personally I am extremely frustrated that we all seem more concerned for your daughter's welfare and you are more concerned with just telling us about your concerns then to do the right thing.

Quote:

Originally Posted by jenniepepsi

yeah fine. maybe ill just stop being concerned about anything. because its obvious that being concerned about my daughter makes me a bad parent. (implied in more than one place, not just on this thread. at least thats the way i took it. sorry if i am wrong)

NO ONE here spends all day with her like i do. no one here sees her sitting really close to the tv, no one here sees her squinting once i ask her to back up so that it doesnt hurt her eyes. no one sees her stick her face REALLY close into a book we are reading together so that she can see it. no one sees her mistake a B for an O or F.

im not gonna argue with you guys on this subject anymore. yes, it SEEMS like i am over cautious, over zealous, however, it only seems like that because when i grew up, it was a routine for my family before school starts each year to visit the doctor, dentist, barber, and eye doctor (and in aylas case, her dermotoligist for ezcema (which gets very bad sometimes) and her allergist and pulumnologist for her asthma, and her speech therepist, and her occupational therepist) so this is what i have done with ayla over the last week, because school starts in 2 weeks for her.

so yes, i have questions, due to these apointments, that i forget to ask the doctor/specialist, and i simply assumed thats what this board was here for, so that i dont have to pay a copay to ask a simple question that most people on this site can answer....

im not gonna bother to explain myself anymore...

I have no reason to believe that you are a bad parent. AT ALL. Everything I've read from you indicates the opposite.

Sitting close to the TV and sticking her face close into a book are easily things that can contribute to needing classes too early. If she is doing these things she needs to be told to sit farther from the TV. Kids do this all the time, its usually nothing to do with vision. And if she is sticking her face that close into a book its time for a rest break, because that simply means that her eyes are working too hard. At five, its easily to confuse letters. She may not know her alphabet well enough to know the difference, or she might just be purposely saying them wrong to get attention.

Sorry that you are frustrated. I think you're a good parent. Doctors orders are doctors orders, I don't think it's a good idea to purchase glasses if your prescription is below -1.00 or +1.00. And most doctors would stay the same. That's only going to make her hate glasses before she actually needs to wear them. I've yet to meet a kid that has worn glasses for more than 6 months and LOVES them. Kids don't like glasses. Why start a battle before it begins? And as far as that website, I think its horrible. You don't know where your lenses and frames are coming from. And they're obviously not quality. Who knows what their acceptable tolerance levels are where they are made. They could be allowed to give you -2.00 glasses for -1.00 prescription. But does that matter cause they don't require a prescription. These are places to be skeptical of. I don't assume that just cause some dude on the street corner hands me vicodin and SAYS he's a doctor, I think that's true. Sorry for the crude analogy. But I've heard of this site for years, and truly wish it would be banned. Do you have a Wal-Mart near you? The one near me has $38 glasses. A whole shelf of $18 frames and $20 lenses (scratch resistant).

As far as the plastic vs. glass discussion. NEITHER are appropriate for children under 18. Neither are shatter proof. Get Polycarbonate or Trivex. A website won't tell you this, but a licensed Optician will.

I'm sorry, I have to have this thread closed.