Me and my boyfriend have been together about a year now, living together for about 5 months. I'm a little under two years younger than him, and about two months ago he met this guy who is more than ten years older than him and is gay. I don't have a problem with gay people, I have gay friends, it's just that I think there might be a problem. He seems to attract gay men to him all the time, usually older ones, and after only knowing this guy for a short period and only getting to talk to him and a while at work the guy is wanting him to spend the weekend with him (and his gay partner) and he wants to do so too! He says it's just because they're friends, but he could be friends with so many other people and I don't mind that they're friends but this guy lies and it's odd that he wants him to spend the weekend with him... is he gay? Or could he possibly be telling the truth?

Well, maybe he is bi.

Do you have a great sex life? Regularly?

I think he might be experimenting. I assuem you're not going.

Straight men DON'T spend the weekend with two gay men without their girlfriend along.

You must ask what's going on her for your OWN protection.

I think your gut tells you he's bi. Or even straight gay - some people are confused on their orrientation. Maybe he is coming out?

CAT is right here. Something doesn't smell right. A straight guy staying with 2 gay guys. Maybe he is experimenting.

How old are you two? Has he asked you to go along?

Sounds fishy to me too. Men have married women just to cover up the fact that they're gay, so him dating you and living with you is no stretch.

I would sit him down and ask for the truth once and for all. If your gut is telling you that he is gay, then he is. Pack your bags and get out, no one should be used this way.

Yeah - I have never heard of a straight man taking off with 2 gay guys for the weekend. It might not be wrong - but it just doesn't happen.

He is either gay or curious and I think it is highly inaproprate to leave you in the dark and spend a weekend with this gay couple The red flag is waving franticaly, so don't sit back and passively accept this behavior.

If something is telling you that the situation isn't right, then it probably isn't. It certainly doesn't sound right to me. Huge red flag here. You may need to take a break from each other for a while and let him sort everything out for himself.

This could go down in the record books as the longest wool pulling ever but while in my late twenties, I was deeply in love with a young man who had friends like that. Only he was very hot to get married and have kids! I wouldn't be rushed like that and he eventually lost interest. I was painfully heartbroken by this. I reluctantly left him and he found a wife and cranked out the kids almost immediately. That hurt even worse and I didn't understand it very well apart from he really really wanted kids.

Cut to present day (almost 30 years later, I hate to admit) where I am watching Brokeback Mountain (great film, too) and I suddenly get it about him. BONK! ALL the lights go on. Think about it, okay?

PS - I am happily married today to the only other man I have loved like that.

Yeah - I'd talk with him - if he doesn't give you straight answers you want. Take a break. This is not right.

You have heaps of great answers here and I have to agree. There is definitely something not right. A stright guy doesn't spend weekends with gay men. At least not without there girlfriend.
Talk to him. Be honest and ask for hoinesty in return! You will be able to tell by his reaction if he is telling the truth or not and I hope you take the appropriate course of action if you think he is lying.

Tabitha - wha thappened?

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Originally Posted by Wildcat21

Tabitha - wha thappened?

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I would like to know also. Did he go? Did she go?.