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-   -   Do I deserve him? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=381559)

  • Jul 30, 2009, 09:23 AM
    hot2hndle
    Do I deserve him?
    I'm with my him for about 2 1/2 years now. We're like married couple, we plan to get married, to have kids unfortunately I had miscarriage last December. We're happy for quite a awhile although he had messed up few times but still I tried to forgive because for me he's my life. I cared about me, he showed love, he's honest, almost everything. The only problem I am dealing with-- he admitted he can not be with 1 woman for his entire life. He said he doesn't understand himself because he find other girl attractive for him. He's afraid he'll hurt me someday. He just can restrain his self from temptation. He admitted his weak, he thought about other girls. I appreciate his honesty and for opening up his thoughts.

    3 days ago he went out with his friend. He went out so drunk and starting to be on his reality.
    He said there was a girl in the bar with his friend that looks hot for him. They talked and he asked for the girls number. He was crying while telling me his story. He was confused why he easily get attracted with other girls at the same time he loves me and he said I could be the best woman for him because I take good care of him, love him, everything. But he's not sure if about me. He find other girls interesting or maybe they can do the same things as I did. He keep on asking himself why human doesn't feel content in life. I was hurt so bad after I heard his thoughts. Day after we've talked when he was sober and feel sorry about he said. I felt so confused because I thought we're on the same page. We talked deeply and he said maybe we can take a break and take the break up as a positive part. For him he wants to have 3 wives and I do want to have 1 guy that I could spend the rest of my life. It hurt so bad that we're going to break up because we want to test if we really want to be together. Or may there is someone out there for us. Its so confusing and painful. Could he really not love me? Or he's just a man that wants to have a lot of woman.

    Its crazy to hear the truth that he can not be with 1 woman. If we continue this realationship we might end up hurting each other. Its hard for me to deal with this because I love him so much but I am scared to that If stay around and I would find out that he's cheating on me that would hurt more.

    Please let me know your thoughts. Its been 3 days now that I am crying so hard. I didn't even go to work because I feel so bad about my relationship. I was planning to go for a vacation just to clear my mind.

    I would appreciate your comments. Thanks!
  • Jul 30, 2009, 09:37 AM
    kctiger

    He has been more than honest with you, now be honest with yourself. Sometimes two people just aren't on the same page as far as long term goals... that's all right. Better to find out sooner than later. No one should be your entire life, as he is to you. You need to build a separate life without him, as he can only hurt you.

    Why don't you think you are good enough without him?
  • Jul 30, 2009, 09:45 AM
    Justwantfair
    I would say that a men that can't be faithful, as he is admitting, doesn't deserve you.

    Not the other way around. If you are faithful and true to a man, you deserve the same in return and he is stating that he can not give that to you.

    Move on to someone who deserves your devotion and will give you the same in return.
  • Jul 30, 2009, 11:21 AM
    hot2hndle
    I don't know. Maybe he's my comfort zone. It just hurt so much thinking we're not meant to be. I'm so confuse right now and feel so much in pain. Thanks for the wonderful comment.
  • Jul 30, 2009, 11:59 AM
    hot2hndle
    Thanks so much! Maybe someday.

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