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-   -   Burned Bridges. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=381297)

  • Jul 29, 2009, 04:13 PM
    cocogir123
    Burned Bridges.
    I was friends with this girl named Trisha for like 2 months. We always gave each other hugs in the hallways and talked. I told a secret to one of my friends, named Sierra, who then told it to the whole school. We were friends for a long time and she tricked me into believing trisha told everyone. Rumors started flooding in like a waterfall. I wasn't exactly popular but I was friends with everyone. Kids in our school started coming up to me asking if the rumors were true but I denied them. My close circle of friends talked me into bullying Trisha until she admitted she started the rumors. We gave her dirty looks, pushed her around and one day things got too serious. Sierra told me that Trisha was planning on fighting me that coming Friday afterschool. I didn't want to do it because she was my former friend. My friends pushed and encouraged me to do it so I did. At the end, me and Trisha got in truble with the princepal and she hates me. I want my friend back badly and its been a month since the fight. But the bridge is already burned. Please tell me what to do.. :(:(:(:(
  • Jul 29, 2009, 04:59 PM
    taoplr
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by cocogir123 View Post
    I was frends with this girl named Trisha for like 2 months. We always gave each other hugs in the hallways and talked. I told a secret to one of my friends, named Sierra, who then told it to the whole school. We were friends for a long time and she tricked me into beleiving trisha told everyone. Rumors started flooding in like a waterfall. I wasnt exactly popular but i was friends with everyone. Kids in our shcool started coming up to me asking if the rumors were true but i denied them. My close circle of friends talked me into bullying Trisha until she admitted she started the rumors. We gave her dirty looks, pushed her around and one day things got too serious. Sierra told me that Trisha was planning on fighting me that coming friday afterschool. I didnt want to do it because she was my former friend. My friends pushed and encouraged me to do it so i did. At the end, me and Trisha got in truble with the princepal and she hates me. I want my friend back badly and its been a month since the fight. But the bridge is already burned. Please tell me what to do..:(:(:(:(

    You did some really dumb stuff, and you let people talk you into doing it. The first thing to do now is decide that you will keep your own counsel, which means to use your judgment and don't let other people make decisions for you. Ever.

    Then, make a sincere apology to Trisha, in private, expecting nothing in return, not even acceptance of your apology, and letting her know how much you miss her friendship. Let her know that you are really sorry.

    If you can make it right with the principal by telling him/her that you were the one who forced the fight to happen, do it. This will earn you respect.

    Finally, be patient. At your age, people forgive more easily than when they are older. Be nice to her, be available, don't push for her to do anything, look for opportunities to build friendship again. They will come. If she never turns around, let go.

    Tao
  • Jul 29, 2009, 06:20 PM
    HelpinHere

    Agree with tao on the stupid decisions thing, and what to do about them.

    I would like to know, if you've gone through all of this, how do you know it is Sierra that told your secret? You don't say anything in your story about that.
    By "we were friends" do you mean you are no longer friends? If not, you need to make it that way.

    Also consider dumping your "close circle of friends", as they pressured you also. If Sierra is the ringleader, and she is encouraging all of this, then they need to choose you or her. I'm sorry to admit it, but in school they can't be friends with both of you really, it just leads to more trouble.
    Especially if they encourage you to fight someone, and you are the only ones in trouble.

    Appologize to Trish. She sounds like a good person. Explain to her what happened, and tell her the truth. It doesn't matter what she says.
    Trust me, at your age, she doesn't really "hate" you, and it will be much easier to get her back on your side than you think. At the very least, just appologize, and have her as an aquantice rather than an enemy right now. You can worry about a friendship later.

    Did you ever find out why Sierra did all of this? Chances are she was jealous of your friendship with Trisha, so if you do decide to stay friends with her (which you shouldn't) watch out around any other new good friends. It may be a good idea to tell her other good friends that she may do these things too, so they don't screw up other friendships...

    Aah, school drama... :rolleyes:
  • Jul 29, 2009, 06:27 PM
    N0help4u

    Also learn never to believe what somebody tells you. If they said that somebody said something about you go to that person and ask them what's up. Get to the truth before you go assuming and believing others.

    Tell Trish she was your best friend and you blew it by believing stupid lies and you definitely learned a hard lesson the tough way.

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