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Well I guess this is a question. I am a woman and I like women and I have this friend who I think she is straight. Well anyway she knows about me and I am starting to have feelings for her what do I do? Bc I am not even sure if she is interested and I would hate to ruin our friendship if I take the wrong approach. And then again I don't know how much longer I can hide my feelings what do I do?
I say be honest with her. If she is a true friend, and really cares about you, it will not ruin your friendship.
Sure it may be akward, and she may turn you down. But again, if she is a true friend she will simply say 'im sorry hon, I just don't like girls the way you do'
And then everything can be OK again :)
But you got to ask honestly. Or you will go your whole life wondering what could have been.
I don't think I would be telling her.
I don't think it would do anything but make her feel awkward around you.
You can't make her any more interested than she or anybody can make you straight.
If she is straight heterosexual then she isn't going to want you interested in her like that.
If she is interested like that, she already knows you like woman so I would leave it to her to make the first move if she were interested.
I've had lesbian friends express interest in me sexually and I haven't taken it badly or felt awkward. As far as I was concerned, it was much the same as a guy that expressed interest who was a friend, the friendship just continued.
However, I think that you need to gauge it according to your knowledge of the person. Only you can know this.
My advice is - if in doubt, don't do it.
Thank you so much for your advice . I really don't know what to do because I don't want to take any chances in losing her as a friend. So from here I will have to see what happens because sometimes I feel like there is a chance they way she may look at me or touch me. But then again she is just a person that shows her affection anyway so really can't tell.Quote:
Originally Posted by Gemini54
Thx for your input. I think I will be safe in just letting her make the move as well because I value the friendship that I have with her and it is not worth it.Quote:
Originally Posted by N0help4u
Would you be offended by a male friend hitting on you? Probably not. You would just be upfront with your interests.
Would a male friend that knows you are a lesbian be able to convince you to be straight to be with him? Probably not. You know that you are a lesbian, you know that she is straight, becareful because while she may not be offended, you aren't going to change who she is. Just like someone else would be unable to change who you are.
Yea but if I tell her and she turn me down then I will feel akward. So, its just a tough situationQuote:
Originally Posted by jenniepepsi
I will see her today so who knows today could be the day. I may not have to say anything she may be the one but if she doesn't I am to afraid to take a chance
No I am not trying to change her I love who she is. That's why I am so careful about it because I don't want to ruin our friendship. So, therefore I am willing to just hold my peace and not say a word because our friendship is more important then how I feel.Quote:
Originally Posted by Justwantfair
I know that as soon as any of my male friends even think I have some real interest in them they back off and then I feel awkward around them.
I wouldn't take this chance. I have had the experience of a male friend hitting on me and he is a very good friend, but because his feelings are out in the open he always refers to them. It's difficult sometimes to be around friends that you know have feelings for you and it is also difficult to be around friends that have been turned down. Hard feelings... So think long and hard before you say anything. Once it's out, it's out.
I have this one friend that is always trying to get me to like him as a gf/bf for the past few years or more and I don't even like being around him because I know he wants more and it makes me feel awkward that I am hurting him by not wanting that. I also feel quilty because he always wants to spend money on me. Then I feel like what am I giving him in return. Then I go home feeling like I am using him when I don't mean it that way. So basically I have come to avoid him more often than not.
You are right. Maybe I should just cut the friendship off all together. We have known each other for about a year and I just told her about me liking women. And she handled it well but in the conversation I wanted to tell her then but I didn'tQuote:
Originally Posted by MsMewiththat
If you can't control your feelings that may be the right thing to do. Otherwise if you can contain your feelings there is no reason to give up a good friendship
So,basically you are straight. And you are speaking from how you may or may not feel if another woman approached youQuote:
Originally Posted by N0help4u
Not woman but relationships in general.
I think you can relate some things with either on some things.
Like many people come here claiming they are not cheating on their husband because they are 'seeing' a girl therefore they are not cheating. But it is the same difference whether it is bf/gf or gf/gf or whatever.
That is not what she is saying
She is saying that her friend already knows
She wants to know if she should tell her she has strong feelings as in interested in her as more than friends only.
Thx nohelp4u don't know you but I apperciate your opinions on today.
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